Can you pls help me to come out of this ?

Question

Hi , I am 24 yrs old female and have no one other that my mom i this world. I feel very upset these days for no reason. I cannot even dream or think postive about myself and i do not think anything can make me happy.I feel myself to be very lonely. I have a job as an HR Executive in a pvt software company but i do not see any stability in my carrer. I am not able to trust myself or anyone these days.
It is very hard to see my mom struggle to get me married as i am not good looking and it is impossible to get me married. I feel miserable about my life. I cannot discuss this with anyone whom i know because i know they will make fun of me. I am sometimes very scared to think that how i will be when i have to lead my life all alone without anyone with me. I want u to pls let me know the ways how i can come out of this fear of living alone and give some confidence before i loose it completely. Pls fo not make fun of my question

Answer 1

Hi .. U have to understand and make yourself believe that there is a lot to life than finding company. I know its difficult to live alone but your present mental state is because of a combination of conditions...
1. Your job which isnt stable..
2. You feel lonely and you arent confident professionally..
N this makes u think how u will take care of everything else in life alone
3. You think one of the reasons for all this is that U dont look good.

U might have more problems.. which only u know of.. think of all the problems u have. make a list.
Then think of ech problem individually.. think wat U can do to make thngs better.. there is always a way. N if we really want to improve things we can always think of somehting.. remember that the only 1 who can stop u from making changes is your own mind. You can take other ppl`s advice for ways of tackling individual problems.. think abt the advice n if u see any slight positive in wat u have been asked to do.. just go ahead with it.
Initially U might find it difficult to start cuz the 1st step is always the most difficult. Once U start making things happen
U`ll gain confidence in yourself.. Atleast U`ll realise that U can change things on your own and you dont need any 1 else to deal with issues in your life.
Just do it.. fight it out. Persistance pays

Answer 2

I am bipolar and have struggled to make sense of all these wrecking emotions, the ups and downs, the fear of failure and success, inability to open up for relationships. However, I came to an awakening last year that I will not let these events control me, that I was not going to get better unless I got help. I had to suck up my pride, check into a hospital and let the professionals take over at that point. They analyzed me (as I was open and forthcoming - very important) and decided what kind of meds might work. I can say that this was a very vital decision; I have made a lot of progress. But meds are not the only answer. Counseling and cognitive behavior practices are even more important. And you know what? In the interim, I still have struggled! However, I do not let this deter me, as I know that this will take years to bring under full control. I found a great support system (try www.nami.org to see if there is a chapter in your area) and became open with my illness (this took some work too). All it boils down to is you need to take that first step; see a professional and they can direct you on the right path. You did a good job by asking for advice here. Pat yourself on the back, as you have to give kudos for the smallest acheivments! I hope this advice has been helpful.

Answer 3

Does your company have an Employee Assistance Plan? Use it.

I did not meet my husband until I was 25. And had totally given up on men. Be careful, guys can sense desperation a mile away.

Tell yourself you are going to give yourself a set period of time off without worrying about getting married, say 6 months to take the pressure off.

Start looking at what you want to do for the next 40 years of your working life. Do you need some career testing - if you are a forest ranger trapped in a cubicle, I can see that as not being good.

I went back to school at 25 and never regretted it.

If you are thinking about hurting yourself, go to emergency and talk to someone. They can refer you to help. Remember, suicide is so much a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

No one will make fun of you. Asking for help - here, and elsewhere is the hardest part.

Hugs,
Sue

Answer 4

I don't think your Mum has the right to get you married. Marriage will happen if you fall in love etc etc.
You earn a wage, so go places and meet other single young women, not with any expectations, just mingle and see if you can chat once or twice, go home . Try it again another time, slowly you will get confident and be able to mix better.
If you are phobic about failure in social settings you can get help from professionals.
Don't focus on your Mum for company, and certainly not on marriage as a way to set up your future!
There are millions of not very good looking people with great lives and friends. Mostly they are happy because their focus in not on what they look like!
Try to spread your wings a little, but always let someone know where you go and plan to stay sober. have a set time to leave and stick to it just to be safe.
The world is a beautiful place with many great friends just waiting to meet you, really.

Answer 5

To tell you the truth you should not feel bad or lonely. It takes longer for some people to get into deep relationships then others. I am 18 years old and not once have I had a girlfriend. You need to find something you are good at and build on that it can easily build your confidence. I use to not be happy and feel like someone who does not deserve anything and I always felt bad about myself. But then I found something I am good at and that is lifting weights and making myself stronger. I don't care what others think of me because that is their opinion and you should do the same. So find something you are good at and build upon that believe me after a while you will begin to feel good about yourself.

Answer 6

Haha, no we dont have steel detectors, video cameras and so forth in our institution. Nor do we've got defense. I accept as true with Bill Kaulitz is scorching ~ MY MAN =D, i could suppose as ive been stalked. You wish to suppose that your competent to visit institution with out continually being on tape, or any person looking you. Even although it is only institution alot of men and women could nonetheless wish a few privateness. What if they'd cameras within the bogs? Freaky : And additionally with steel detectors, i dont get the factor of that. No one within the correct brain could carry whatever like a gun to institution, and for the few that experience and been at the information, good theres not anything we would have performed approximately it. If someone institution is that 'tight' approximately defense etc, then might be there's whatever they are able to do then making the youngsters suppose stalked. And no it wouldnt make me suppose more secure, simply on account that a few cameras or and so forth are hooked up, whatever unhealthy can nonetheless occur to you. And our institution for instance is lovely nontoxic, they lock the bogs and recess and lunch so that you ought to use the employees ones in the event you have to pass in bewteen elegance. They will violate prosucters or what ever its known as if they arrive into our institution, they lock the entire gates so nobody can are available in. The most effective front is close the workplace. They even have academics on backyard responsibility. So what i've now makes me suppose lovely nontoxic, then all this 'defense' stuff. Hope i helped. Haha, sorry its alot approximately my opinion. =D

Answer 7

The very 1st thing is to take a moment and pray to what ever God you worship for salvation from your fear. We live in a world of fear now, and bringing more on yourself is useless.

2nd...........understand that you are very special because you were created by God for a personal relationship with Him. He wants you. That is all it takes. Understand that one principle and nothing else matters. Download some "BarlowGirl" music because they really talk about being single and strong.

3rd.........join a new group or church and meet some new people. We make our family in this crazy world where the vast majority of people are not married. You are a wonderful person and need only to let others into your life to show you that.

4th........Believe in yourself. Say it every day, every minute. I am special and beautiful. Say it, write it until you believe it.

Answer 8

You sound as though you are suffering from depression. You may not be able to 'come out of it' without assistance from a doctor and medication. Trust me, I know. You pretty much described me, only older. You should see your doctor about these feelings and tell your mom to lay off the marrying thing. If it is meant to be, it will happen when it happens. Hope this helps!!!

Answer 9

Getting married is not about looks. It's about personality and connection. Guys are attracted to confident women. Believe me, guys will be attracted to you when you accept yourself for all of your strengths and weaknesses. Everybody has them both. Look at what your strengths are and focus on them.

It sounds like you are depressed. What you really need is something that will build your confidence. You should see a therapist right away. We are not doctors here and you may benefit from some medication like Zoloft, besides just realizing that we all are who we are, and we create our realities with the mindsets we keep

Answer 10

You have my full sympathy for your situation. I suggest that you go to the free online course on Bach Flower Essences at the following location:

http://floweressencesintro.onlinecourse.com/
and after a few hours or days or going through the simple lessons, I am sure that you will be able to pick out the suitable flowers for you.

Reiki will also help you. Prayer and meditation are other useful tools. Wish you all the best.