Whenever someone says "I love your shoes" or "I love your shirt," I always feel compelled to respond by complimenting them about something. I usually get a funny look. Isn't it polite to compliment someone after they have complimented you? I'm American... if that makes any difference.
2007-03-23 21:12:54 · 15 answers · asked by Mrs. Travolta 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
you don't have to compliment them back. "thank you" should be enough. if you honestly DO like something they're wearing, go ahead an compliment them. but if you're just saying it to compliment them back, it will most likely not sound genuine and they will know you're lying. that's why you get a funny look.
PS - i guess i'm the only person who understood why you told us you are American. most cultures are different and etiquette is different in some places.
2007-03-23 21:24:06 · answer #1 · answered by ♥ it's katie 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, I'm an Aussie brought up with English etiquette, so I'm not sure about the US. But generally if somebody compliments you then it is gracious to say, "Thank you." If you deprecate yourself by saying something like, "This is just an old dress", or such, then that is rebuffing the compliment. Just accept that you have received a compliment and do not feel compelled to return one.
It is nice, however, to compliment other people if you genuinely like something such as they have a new hairstyle, or you like their shoes or whatnot; and not expect a compliment in return.
I do hope this helps!
Blessings, Gypsy Queen
2007-03-24 08:16:44 · answer #2 · answered by Gypsy_Queen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's polite but probably doesn't sound very sincere... like you did it out of obligation. It's better to just say "OH THANK YOU!". They'll feel better about giving you the compliment if you sound as if you really appreciated it rather than seeming uncomfortable by "blowing it off" and giving them a compliment to take the focus off yourself.
A trick I have learned, if you really feel compelled to give them a compliment in return is to say, "Oh thank you... I WAS JUST THINKING THAT YOUR HAIR LOOKS REALLY NICE TODAY"... then they think that you were already thinking something but they beat you to the compliment.
2007-03-24 08:55:29 · answer #3 · answered by THATgirl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it's a little impolite.
Not as impolite as, say, feeding someones new handbag to her dog.
On a 1-10 scale of impoliteness, with 1 is showing up two minutes late on a birthday party and 10 is to cause world war III, I'd say you make a 2 or 3.
You probably do it because the other person is 'nice' to you by giving you a compliment and you feel compelled to do something nice back - and you give in to that feeling right away.
It's not done because you give the other person the feeling that
a) you don't want to be in their debt
b) they were fishing for compliments themselves.
So next time, try to say 'thanks, how nice of you to say that!'
2007-03-24 04:27:31 · answer #4 · answered by mgerben 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You don't need to return a compliment.. unless of course you have one that you could sincerely give! The polite thing to do is to be gracious and accept the compliment... something like "Thanks, I like them too" or whatever... It IS rather rude to be dismissive of the compliment .. it's not being modest to go "Oh this old thing.. I've had it forever". Not accepting the compliment is an insult to the person giving it, rather like throwing their gift in their face!
2007-03-24 04:27:28 · answer #5 · answered by endorable 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds insincere if you compliment someone out of "obligation" & the person recieving the compliment will know your full of b.s. Just say "thank you" & try to work on your self esteem. They complimented you because they wanted to. Try to learn to accept it. Good Luck.
2007-03-24 04:18:39 · answer #6 · answered by Toni 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's polite to say thank you. Etiquette says nothing about complimenting back. That just makes you look insecure or obligated to carry on conversation. A simple thanks and a change of subject is all you need.
2007-03-24 04:19:04 · answer #7 · answered by Chris 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I completely agree. It can be awkward because you don't want it to seem like you are only complimenting them because they complimented you.
2007-03-24 12:18:17 · answer #8 · answered by CedarledgeWIT07 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is the polite thing to do. You do not have to return a compliment, it is just a nice thing to do
2007-03-24 04:34:38 · answer #9 · answered by Lov'n IT! 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Everybody feels good with a compliment!Giving or receiving!!!
2007-03-24 06:51:22 · answer #10 · answered by lady2 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋