My almost 12 year old daughter has recently been begging me for a Chihuahua puppy! I am not sure if I should get her one as I doubt her resonsibility. She is getting C's in most of her classes, doesn't do her chores, is very picky but has promised me that she will look after her.
I asked her why she wants a Chihuahua, her response; "because they are cute and small".
She thinks she knows all there is to know about dogs but doesn't even know how to spell VETERINARIAN.
I am not sure what to do. She has said that she will "mature" when she gets the dog and she will train her and make the dog be the best dog in world...
I am lost at what to do. Does anybody else have any experience with their young daughter asking for a puppy? I know that Kelly won't want to get up at 2am to take her out to potty or to give up her social life with friends for a puppy.
2007-03-23 19:55:13 · 38 answers · asked by julie m 1 in Pets ➔ Dogs
One other thing that worries me about getting her a puppy: her "role model" is PARIS HILTON! Kelly seems to think it's cute to dress dogs up in dresses, clothes and shoes. She said she wants to carry her puppy in a bag and show it off to everyone she can show.
I know how much Kelly wants a Chihuahua and I always give in to things.
I bought my now 17 year old daughter, Natalie, a 9 week old Lhasa Apso from a breeder for $800 when Nat was 13 and we had to surrender Jack to the SPCA when he was 2 years old because Nat didn't train him, he was aggressive, not housebroken and his fur matted as Nat didn't groom him. Luckily as Jack was purebred and still only young, he was adopted out only a day after we dropped him off. It was a lot of heartbreak for me especially as I was the one left with cleaning his mess, feeding and grooming him. Ultimately, I was Jack's owner and I don't want a dog of my OWN to care for.
I also have a 5 year old daughter who I am afraid will mistreat the pup.
2007-03-23 20:00:30 · update #1
Mandy; I took her down to the shelter 2 weeks ago and told her that if I get her a dog and we abandon him, he will probably be put down. She simply said "So? Can we go to the pet shop? I saw a dog dress I want you to buy"! Word for word!
My sister has a Beagle x Rott and my friend has a St. Bernard and a mutt. They have both offered for Kelly to come over for a few days while they go away but Kelly said that she was "too busy" to look after "dumb" dogs for other people!
2007-03-23 20:08:34 · update #2
I think you've answered you're own question. I think you just needed someone to just sound it off of.
She is not ready. Reread your question and you will see that you have your answer. Sometimes it just takes talking to someone to figure it out ourselves.
2007-03-23 20:07:19 · answer #1 · answered by Teresa t 5 · 5⤊ 0⤋
Ask yourself this: If you were a puppy, would you like you're daughter as your new mommy?
If she just wants to show it off, then no way!! If she is looking for a companion and friend, that is different. Would she be interested in a different breed? Is it the friend she wants, or the fashion statement?
It sounds as if she's not interested in the needs and wants of the animal, but rather only interested in what she wants. I would suggest telling her no until you can observe her behavior around other dogs. If she's not willing to doggy sit another dog, then she isn't much of a dog lover.
When I was 12 (I am 31 now), I wanted a puppy badly. I had poor grades in school and was not the easiest kid to raise. I finally got the puppy and it changed my life. The puppy was my best friend for years to come. BUT, I wanted a puppy. I didn't much care what kind of puppy because I wanted the companionship. If you're daughter really wants a puppy, she will settle on a different breed.
Also, the local animal shelters often will let you take a dog for a trial period before fully committing. I've known plenty of dog breeders that would do the same. If you do give in, at least try to find someone that will take the dog back if it doesn'y work out...
2007-03-23 20:58:00 · answer #2 · answered by stardust23716 3 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Julie,
Well, you have a lot of good advice already. My two cents would be this. As someone said before, Chihuahuas are not good starter pets. Unless you're ready to take on the responsibility for the dog, just in case the child doesn't know herself well enough, don't. On the other hand, a family dog is one of the best things that can happen for children. It sounds like your young lady wants to emulate Paris and that would mean dressing the puppy up once or twice until the novelty wore off and then turning her attention to other more important things such as learning how to look glamorous (would that it were not so). If you want to do something great for your kids, get a Cocker Spaniel. You would still have to take care of the dog, but you would have a wonderful companion and so would the kids.
One more thing. Getting her a dog and then her learning to be responsible is like jumping out of an airplane and then learning to sky dive (not a good idea).
2007-03-23 20:33:39 · answer #3 · answered by elden w 4 · 2⤊ 2⤋
This would be a good opportunity to have her learn some responsibility. Tell her there is no way you will even consider it unless she can become more responsible in other areas such as school and chores. Give her a time period of several months or so to prove that she can be responsible with these things before you will consider it. If she follows through, you still have a very important decision to make. You have to remember that a dog is a living being with feelings, not just some toy. If you have any doubts about whether she (and you) can make this HUGE commitment, DON'T DO IT!!!!! There are too many animals without homes in this world already, so don't support people who are breeding more unless you are SURE that you and she are ready to make a commitment for the life of the dog (which could be 20 years). Think long and hard about this decision, and don't just give in to her begging.
2007-03-23 20:08:53 · answer #4 · answered by animal lover 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Well first of all I wouldn't be bagging on your 11 year old daughter for not knowing how to spell veterinarian. that is a big word for an 11 year old. second it is normal for a child to be irresponsible. SHE IS A CHILD. I would get her a dog when she is a little older, probably around sophomore in high school. jr high is a big adjustment and so is high school and i think when she is 15 or 16 she would be ready. a dog can't be just a childs responsibility. you have to help out as well. she needs to focus on school or chores. that is a lot of responsibility for such a young child. and Chihuahuas WEREN'T bred for children! They naturally don't like them and don't get your child a dog just because they are "small and cute" that is not a good enough reason. also she is not old enough to "mature" i know they say that and they do it for the first week or two or until the excitement wears off.
ALSO: if your other daughter couldn't care for the lhasa apso why would you think your even younger daughter would be even better?? i don't think you should hand over an $800 dog to an 11 or 13 year old. they need to earn it. If Paris Hilton is her role model, wouldn't that explain the lack of responsibility as well? maybe you should get her focused on better things while she is still young.
2007-03-23 20:06:55 · answer #5 · answered by DaisyMae 1 · 6⤊ 1⤋
Sorry to say it but per all the info you have given Id have to say that a puppy doesnt sound like a very good idea for Kelly. She sounds a bit immature for her own pet & the fact tht you are not wanting to be stuck w the responsibilty then Id have to say NO. You already went thru this w your older daughter & though each child is different Kelly isnt sounding like good candidate right now. Just the reason she gave for wanting the dog makes me knda cringe, and also you have to look at the fact that she already saw her older sister get a dog when she wanted one & then when it became too much and/or she just didnt want to deal w the responsibility the dog was wisk off to a different home & again her older sis got her way....(Im not saying you did anything wrong there, it was for sure the best thing to do to give up Jack so that all involved could be happy &healthy) What I am saying is that in Kellys mind it "may " look like ..." oh I can get a pup but if it turns ou too be too much we can just get rid of her" Id wait till Kelly matures a bit despite how much whining you may have to endure, its REALLY would be better for al linvolved I think. Best of luck
2007-03-23 20:09:51 · answer #6 · answered by *♥* ♥* FaeGoddess*♥*♥* 6 · 4⤊ 1⤋
First rule with kids and pets is never expect the kid to care for the animal themselves as you'll end up doing the work instead! You don't want a pet that will be eventually given up because you're tired of doing something you don't want to do. There's enough unwanted pets out there without adding to the mix.
With that said, pets help kids in numerous ways. They teach a kid responsibility and kids who have pets tend to better in school (especially if they do extracurricular activities such as obedience!), live happier lives and tend to bring a family together. I found that when my friends weren't there my dogs were. You may want to ask your daughter to research the subject and give you a report. If she's serious about the dog, she'll do the work to prove herself.
I'd also encourage her to research breeds that are better for your family. As others have said, Chihuahuas aren't the best family dogs.
I had a similar situation when I begged my parents for a dog. In the end my sister and I got two whippets as my sister and I did the research on how to care for it. We even looked at the house to see where was a good place to put the dog house. The entire family went to obedience school when our first dog was a puppy, which taught all of us a lot about what was acceptable and what wasn't. Our Family life wasn't perfect, but it was certainly improved with the family pets!
2007-03-23 20:10:31 · answer #7 · answered by white_ravens_white_crows 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I don't think your daughter should have a puppy at all, unless you are willing to take care of the puppy as well. It's sad to see how much influence Paris Hilton and other celebrities have on people. When the taco bell commercial came out so many people went and got chihuahuas too. Unfortunately, the chi fame had died and a lot were abandoned. Now the craze has come back, and I truely pray that the same story doesn't happen over again. But chihuahuas need a lot of attention and care.
When I was 12 my cousins chihuahua had puppies and I begged my mom to let me have one. I was ready to do whatever I needed to get it. When I finally convinced her, I was so ecstatic. I fed her, played with her, and tried my best to train her. So I thought at the time. But to be honest, I don't remember ever cleaning her pee and poo. And I don't remember ever waking up in the middle of the night to check up on her...my MOM did. Soon enough I was going to school seeing my dad on weekends and really just wasn't as devoted to the chi, so my mom gave her away to a friend. I really don't think a chi is good for her now, maybe when she is older and shows responsibilty. Unless you are willing to take care of it too.
2007-03-23 21:34:42 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I don't have any children, but I’ll tell you what happened with me. I’m 22 now, but I was only 7 or 8 when this happened.
I used all the same lines on my mom. “I’ll take care of it.” It’ll help me be responsible” I could go on forever. The point is, I made all the promises I could think of that would make her say “yes.” I had an intense interest in animals (and still do), so my mom was convinced. Did I keep any of them? No way. My mom was saddled with all the hard work and financial commitments that comes with a dog, and I did nothing to help her. She had two kids, a puppy, a full-time job and a failing marriage to deal with. She ended up falling head-over-heals in love with the dog, but that didn’t change the fact that I had broken all of my promises. All of the work fell to her.
Did I change? Yes. I loved the dog to death, and all throughout her life, I never got bored of her or tired of her, but it wasn’t until I was 14 or 15 that I really started helping out with the dog. By the time the dog was in her final years, she had become my responsibility completely. No one else did a thing for her, and my mom has told me many times that if I had not taken the job of caring for a very elderly dog onto my shoulders, she would have been put to sleep, because the huge task of caring for her was too much. I got barely any sleep and was cleaning accidents daily. It was my love for her that pulled me through, until the day I decided that she was no longer living a good life and tearfully had her put to sleep. Still, my mom had to take care of her for years without any help. Having the dog did not help me become responsible, age did.
If you already suspect that your daughter wants the dog for the wrong reasons or won’t be responsible, then follow your instincts and don’t get the dog. It is not fair to the dog, or to you, nor is it fair to let your daughter to become a spoiled Paris Hilton clone. A dog is not something your daughter should be getting so she can dress it up or make people jealous of her. If that's all she wants, buy her an expensive purse with the money you would have used for the dog. A purse cannot suffer emotional distress when it is not taken care of properly, and it sounds like putting a life in your daughter's hands is just asking for a sad ending for everyone.
If you already had to give one dog up, I'm not sure I understand why you would even think of repeating the same mistake again. By not giving in to your daughter's selfish demand, you are being a good mother, not a bad one.
I know my mother wishes she would have waited until I was older. Until she knew I would be responsible. You know your daughter best, and it sounds like you already know the answer to your own question. If your daughter can’t even take care of her own responsibilities like chores and grades, then how can you expect her to take care of another living thing, especially one that requires everything a dog does?
Please do the right thing. So many mothers give in to their kids because they don't want to be hated. My mom always told me "You'll understand someday that I'm not doing it to be mean." She was so right. Any bad feelings your daughter develops towards you over this will not last forever, and you can rest easy knowing that you did the right thing for you, your daughter, and the dog you never got that instead got to go to someone who really would appreciate it.
2007-03-23 20:24:59 · answer #9 · answered by Mandy 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
No, do not buy your daughter a Chi. It is unfair to a dog for it's well-being to be entrusted with a child. Little puppies are cute when they are little....but the newness will wear off. This will be a repeat of what happened with your older daughter. If your daughter is sincere about wanting to care for a dog/dog(s)...let her volunteer at your local animal shelter. See how that works out.
I do not feel an 11 year old will enjoy cleaning up after a puppy. If it were to be a family pet it would be different, however, you have stated that you do not want a dog.
Please, give careful consideration to this! I have a very tiny Chi, and they are a lot to care for. If you do decide to get her a Chi, learn the breed. They are very susceptible to hypoglycemia (low blood sugar), and need to be fed often. If their blood sugar should happen to drop, immediate measures must be taken to prevent death. Chis are Not generally good with children. Whatever you decide, Best Of Luck!!
2007-03-23 20:17:05 · answer #10 · answered by Pebbles 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Ok i hate to be rude but are you seriously asking this question? I have been that little girl, i wanted a kitten - i cuddled it, i loved it, and i slept with it but other than that it was my mom that fed it, watered it, cleaned its litter box, gave it medicine etc. Also your daughter shouldn't be rewarded for making c's or refusing to do her chores. When your daughter goes to college in 6 years where is the dog going to be? I doubt your daughter will pick up its poop if it poops in the floor and since you already seem to have a pretty full load being number one a MOM (the hardest job EVER) and then when your daughter is supposed to be helping you out by doing a few chores you end up having to do anyway. That is a big no, a big fat no. That is just reinforcing negative behavior in children she's going to see that she can make poor grades, disobey, and throw all of her responsibilities onto someone else and get away with it. Also if you think by giving your 11 year old daughter a dog will "mature" her thats not good, because i don't know many "mature" 19 and 20 year olds i doubt that from the description of your daughters behavior that she will mature with a dog. I hate to be harsh but dogs are not accessories, toys, or something you can give a KID. Thats irresponsible pet ownership.
2007-03-23 20:07:41 · answer #11 · answered by revenantxheart 2 · 7⤊ 1⤋