In a nutshell:
best friends for 3 years, just recently found out we've liked each other the whole time but didn't know. feelings are mutual BUT decided not to risk everything now and have a relationship. Said he wanted a "long lasting real serious" one when the right time comes - not now.
He's HAPPY that we're best friends again because he said he can "talk to me about everything and anything again" and not like before where he didn't know what to do, say, and was more nervous around me. He mentioned (hinted) that beautiful girls intimedate boys and says that guys always check me out b/c i have "looks". He "fishes" for answers to see if i'm interested in anyone. He says, "would u get mad if i went out w. someone in a month, 2 months?" just to get my reaction - he responded, "if i ever break up with someone, at least you'll still always be here"
when i said, "everything's gonna be normal again - guys will be at me & you'll be the friend always there" - he sounded sad...
2007-03-23 18:44:55 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
**** he's the "shy boy" type*****
oh yeah and i think he's trying to get over me by talking to his old crushes (even though they are taken) because he knows i can bounce back easily with other guys...he loves our history - turns out this whole time we've sercretly admired each other but never knew it...i think he wants to make more history with me..
2007-03-23 18:45:09 · update #1
Actually it seems like you pretty much already understand the situation. I'm assuming he fears he'll lose you if he tries going any further but at the same time he'd like to find out how far things can go.
If you feel like you can both make a more serious relationship work I suggest going for it. I had a similar situation where I ended up not trying anything and to this day I wonder what might have happened if I'd tried.
Good luck with whatever you decide and I hope you both find happiness.
2007-03-23 18:52:16 · answer #1 · answered by mudsplitter 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he is not normal or he has a problem. And you too because you are actually accepting this situation like that.
Common, if you two like each other, you should date for real, and give it a try. It is not like you two are a “backup” incase a relation fails with someone else…” oh is ok, I have my backup with me, let me restore it…” LOL
That is stupid, and retarded if you ask me.
Just date, and find out more about each other. Real couples are also best friends. It sounded like you two are best friends, and there is a mutual attraction too, so what are you two waiting for?
You never leave things for later as later might never come. Never forget that. I am telling you for my own experience. And tell him that too, is an advice for both of you. Just say a friend of yours told you that. Go for it, and agree before you do it that if you two discover that are not really meant to be together a s a couple, then you two will be happy that you gave it a try, and will stay friends forever.
That is what really is to be a mature adult.
Good luck.
2007-03-24 01:53:40 · answer #2 · answered by Dan D 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is tricky. I have had, and am still in, similar situations. I have had a best guy friend confess he liked me, but I did not want a relationship at that time, and our friendship has gone from being wonderful to awkward at best. The situation I am currently in, this guy & I have been friends for about 6 years. He confessed to me several months ago that he has liked me the whole time, and I have liked him as well, but that he does not want to date right now. We hang out, and he fishes for information about whether I date or not, and makes sure to tell me that he does not date or hang out with other girls the same way he hangs out with me. In his situation, he has been seriously hurt by girls in the past & is afraid of starting another relationship only to have it go just as bad as his prior ones. He wants to be my best friend, hang out and I don't know if it'll lead to dating or not. Whatever you do, do not wait around on this guy to make up his mind. If someone interesting pops up, check it out because you are not in a relationship with him, and that may make him wake up and take some action to keep you with him.
2007-03-24 02:34:57 · answer #3 · answered by miac84 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok. I have been in this situation. Yet it was a long time ago. In high school. I had this friend named Jeffrey. It's funny how we were introduced. He had a friend named Mikey. And I knew his gf. I was a threat to her. So she decided to call herself. Hookin me up. Jeffrey and I hated each other's gutts at first. After spendin some time with each other. We were attracted too each other. Yet as time went on. I grew to love him. As a brother. Or good friend. And that was what I treated it as. Yet one day we were hangin out. And out of the blue. He just kissed me. And that kiss put a damper. On our friendship. He then confessed. And told me that: He wanted to pursue a relationship with me. I let him know that: I only liked him as a friend. I noticed he was more distant. And our so-called friendship was over. I was hurt. We were so close. We use to giggle on the phone. I loved to be around him. Yet not like that. I felt that we were cool enough. To get pass that little bump in the road. Yet in a sense he resented me. I was pissed off. And confused by his coldness. That I quit dealing with him. Each time thereafter. It was like this tension between us. If his behavior grows more awkward. You may need to sever ties. If he can't respect your feelings. Yet if you really like him. The way that he does you. Then go for it.
2007-03-24 02:06:32 · answer #4 · answered by andelagdn 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think taking a friendship to an intimate relationship is just scary to him. If it doesn't work out, he is afraid you won't be friends anymore.
It sounds to me like he really cares, he is just afraid to move forward. Plus, he might not think the level of emotion he has for you is returned.
2007-03-24 01:50:23 · answer #5 · answered by Smooch The Pooch 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sometimes u just wanna save some1 until l8r. u no, wait until there r no limits, and both of u have matured and made enuff mistakes that this relationship could b perminant. u have his heart, so take it easy on that whole talking about other guys thing. but, yea, he is so serious about u, lol.
2007-03-24 01:50:29 · answer #6 · answered by lily 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just kiss him and see his reaction...
2007-03-24 01:49:01 · answer #7 · answered by babygirl07 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes and no
2007-03-24 01:47:26 · answer #8 · answered by Kemma 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋