i know there is visitation guidlines is there guidlines for revoked visitation?

Question

my husband and i were granted soul custody of his daughter and the natural mother was ordered no visitation..the mother keeps calling wanting to talk to the daughter but she upsets her all the time..do i have to let her talk to her? is there guide lines for this? i cant find them on the internet..and i thought there might be somthing saying if the natural mother has any rights what so ever? please help me if you can...

Answer 1

Oh boy, you are in for a very long battle honey. Yes, there are guidelines, but getting them enforced can be a nightmare. Something major must have happened for the courts to grant your husband and you sole custody with no visition. And no visition, means just that....no visitation. By phone, letter, appearance, etc. No means no. If they would have okayed any type of contact, it would have be written into the order. I normally don't advise this, but based on what you said about her being upset with your daughter all the time, I'm going to give you a little confidential insight. Have this woman's number blocked from your phone through the phone company. Take a copy of your order to the school and have them make a copy of it and instruct them this woman is to have NO CONTACT with this child what so ever. (once you shut off the phone access, the school usually comes next). Then sit down with your daughter and explain to her that her mother has some issues that she needs to work through and the court gave you guys some time for her to do that. Tell her that if she wants to contact her mother, she can do it through letters or cards (don't discourage the love she has for her mother...no matter how bad, it's still her mom), and that you guys are taking some steps to make sure that she is safe emotionally, physically and mentally. The next time the mom calls, calmly inform her of your reasons, remind her of the court order and then tell her that until you see some sort of major change in her behavior towards this little girl, that is all she is going to get. Then tell her if she has a problem with it, she can take you to court. It would probably be best if dad did the talking, so you aren't the one to blame for this. You should also know that this is legal in all 50 states honey. You aren't breaking the law, you are just enforcing what is not written. Because there are so many situations on how a parent could lose custody/parental rights, our law books generalize the statutes, leaving it up to individual court jurisdiction by having the judges use their own discretion. The bad thing about that, is that many judges don't have to live with the decisions they hand down and they often aren't as detailed as they need to be when it comes to the general public.

I wish you all the patience in the world honey....things are going to get worse before they get better. Keep your chin up and your mindset on that little girl....she needs you.

Answer 2

What the others have suggested is a great idea. You must consider the govern laws and the court order involve. What I would do if I were you, persuade the mother to send only letters to her daughter, and you might want to give her a P.O. Box address.

This way you can read the letters and have the daughter to write back when she want to. Don't use the computer, because it sounds like her mother is not put together right! If her mother agrees regarding the writing letter, she must promise not to call.

If this don't work out, change the phone number and put a restraining order on her. What ever happens you and your husband must be careful of her. Talk to your step-daughter, make sure she understands she's not to have any contact with her mother. Educate her on what to do if she come to the school or she's walking home from somewhere and she sees her mother. Make she knows how to call 911. Everyone don't go according the rules and you know that. The primary goal is for you to educate your daughter and you and your husband to use ever precaution at all times. Please be careful and talk to your daughter.

God Bless

Answer 3

Most of the answer to this question depends on the state you reside in, and the terms of the custody agreement. First I would read the papers carefully to get a good idea of what you can and cannot do. If you still get no help from that, contact the attorney that you used during the custody or divorce proceedings. They should be able to tell you what your rights are. If that does not work, contact your state's bar association for more information. Sometimes you can override the conditions in an agreement, sometimes not. Above all else, put the well being of the child first.

Answer 4

You need to consult an attorney until then restrict the Mother's access to the child via phone. If you have soul custody then you should act in the child's best interest. If the mother was ordered no visitation it is unlikely that you have to allow her to talk to the child on the phone. However, I would contact the attorney who handled the custody hearing/divorce and make them clarify that point for you.

Answer 5

If no visitation was ordered then one would assume that there would be no phone contact. When we gained custody of my husbands daughter we were told that if mom attemped contact to deny her. We were told to tell her that she needed to file with the court and ask the judge for permission.

Answer 6

I would assume not but allow me to explain. In the world of social services and foster care, parents who have their children taken away do not have the right to call their children without the permission of the judge. If the child is old enough allow her to make the decision as to if she wants to talk to her biological mother. If not support the her decision not to talk to her. The worst case scenario you go back to court (given the mother has enough ambition to take you to court) and explain that she "harasses" the child and you feel it is in the best interest of the child to not have contact with her mother.