I hate my mother, how do i deal with this?

Question

My father died not too long ago, and im 15. Before you know it my mom has a bf and I am moving from Austin 8 hours away to west Texas. Going from a fabulous place to the middle of nowhere (literally). I hate him too, he dosn't know me yet he says he loves me, and tells me what to do! And all I have to say "f" u, your not my dad! And yet through all of this my mom is still a fuc*ing bitc*. I am at a healthy weight yet, im fat and i need to work out. really, im 5' 8" and i weigh 145 is that bad? am i obese? no! and i know that!
Worst of all i moved from all my friends and my sisters, they stayed in Austin with their dad, now im here alone.
Today I left my bedroom light on, and she called me while i was in the middle of a movie demanding me to come home i was so mad! and so was my ride. Not to mention my mother used to be so modern, pretty, wore make up, had a really good job and now she is a hippe just like the guy im living w/ now.

Cant i have a normal free mom just like my friend

Answer 1

to bad you had to leave austin i used to live there and it is my favorite place, where intezas do you live now? email me blue

Answer 2

You'll realize later what a black mark you have put on your own heart by hating your mother because you don't like her present choices in her life.

15 year old girls get away with murder, you are a BRAT. When you get out of the house, you can live your perfect life, without an education and as trailer trash probably. OR, you could use a little reason; allow your mother some happiness and stop being so selfish.

Your mouth is like the bottom of a garbage pail as well, and that denotes that you are trashy. Clean up your act. NO sympathy for you at all, leave that to all the bleeding hearts here.

Answer 3

Chill out. What you're going through is called life. Everybody has felt the way you do now towards their mom at some point. But, how can you disrespect her by calling her those nasty words? She didn't teach you any manners or to respect her? I don't care if you're 15 or not, you're old enough to know better. That is your mom, your family. You should go along with whatever regardless. She's a grown woman. She can do whatever she wants. When you get older, if you aren't trashy and have some kind of sense, you might look back @ all this and feel hella bad.

Answer 4

You sound more like your mad at your dad because he past away and left you here alone. What happened , happened. Your taking things out on your mom cause she found someone so soon, but it probably won't last. You should at least let her find love again even if his more hippy then you want him to be. If shes in love then why wouldn't you want her to be. You sound like your trying to make things as hard on her as you can. It's not going to get you anywhere , so look on the bright side your 15 and in 3 you can move back if you want.It seems like a long time but try to make new friends and if you learn to deal with this and not cause problems then you'll be able to go out at night and not have to be home that much with them. Right? Hide your anger or learn to control it. Don't let it back fire on you and mess up your chances of being with your friends.

Answer 5

first of all, my heart goes out to you because my dad passed away when I was 16 and I know the hurt you are experiencing

the fact that so many things in your life will never be the same with your dad gone - one of which is your moms' sudden attachment to someone else .....
but you must realize that altho she may not be showing it, she is hurting in her own way - people have different ways of dealing with being alone and some women just do not cope with it well and connect with whoever next pays attention to them .....

being 5'8" and 145 lbs is not extreme by any means ...... with the stress it is natural that you will lose or gain weight ......
do not be so hard on yourself

give yourself some time to adapt to all the changes - new school, new friends, new partner for mom, new environment.....take it one hour at a time .......
try to look at what the positives are of where you are now - the city I mean .....

opportunites can come from all kinds of life adventures - see what good you can make come of this also

God loves you - simply share your burdens with Him.....He is right where He has always been - waiting with outstretched arms!

Will be praying for you!!

Answer 6

You sound desperate and miserable. I just wanted to let you know that someone heard you and is thinking about you and will be praying for you and sending you lots of angels to get through this. What you're facing is hard and you seem to be very strong so far in some ways you may be stronger than your mom and I know how hard that can be. I wish that I could give you a big hug. You sound like a very smart and cool girl. Oh and 145 at 5'8" is definitely not fat!

Answer 7

When I was 14, my mother remarried and moved me to Matador, Texas. You didn't tell me the town in west Texas where you're moving, but I'll bet you ten million dollars that Matador is more "in the middle of nowhere" than where you're going! My move turned out to be one of the best things that ever happened to me. I met some fabulous friends. There wasn't anything to do in town, so we had to be creative, and I ended up having more fun than most people in larger cities do. People now tell me they are envious of my teenage years in west Texas. My stepfather turned out to be a fantastic person who helped me all my life. He's dead now, and I really miss him. He introduced me to his niece, who became my best friend. We're still best friends.

Here is the advice I'd give you:

1. Go willingly and don't complain. Make the best of it.
2. Be open minded. Make as many friends as you can. Look for fun and creative things to do.
3. Be kind to your stepfather. He could turn out to be one of the best friends you'll ever have.
4. Be kind to your mom. Try to see things from her point of view.
5. Talk to someone you trust about the death of your father. I'm sure you still have a lot of grief associated with this.
6. Study your head off and make straight A's so you can be accepted to the University of Texas. It's getting harder and harder to get in. This is a good way to get back to Austin.

Answer 8

Well it sounds like your Mom is expecting alot from you to just turn your life 180 degrees so quickly. You were raised by your father too and are already your own individual, even if you are young. They do have a right as your parents to determine your life to an extent, but they have no right to force you to like it or not. They also have no right to say you are too fat if you feel comfortable the way you are. You should try to stay in touch with your sisters, regardless of what your mother says on that. They are as much your family as your mother is, and family is important, no matter how dysfunctional it is. As for the bedroom light thing it is obviously important to your Mother and/or her new boyfriend (possibly because they are as you say hippies and likely have great concern for the environment.) It is kinda good to turn the lights off when not in use for that reason(the environment), but I think everyone over reacts on that. The environment was doing fine before people came along, and is doing fine now and will be when we are gone as well, regardless of what we do. People give themselves too much credit in regards to theri opinions on how bad we can mess up the ecosystems. We fail to consider that nature does it too from time to time and makes anything we can do seem like a slight temperature change.. I think your mother over reacted on calling you home in the midle of a movie and if she wanted you home that bad should have picked you up herself, not relyed on you to get your ride to change plans. I only hear your side of the story and maybe she isn't all that bad, but from the way you put things she does sound like a miserable *****...

Answer 9

Just finish your highschool and make sure you get into college! That's the surest way to move on. Then you're free and you can get on with your life. And then you can focus on the things that are important to you. And focus on those values in life that are important to you.
But also grieve for your dad. Grieving is a normal and important process. And missing him is normal. It helps to imagine that he still looks out for you, to make sure that you're all right. But make him proud.
Maybe see a counsellor at school about grieving. Don't let anger (against your mom) cloud what is really your way of mourning.
Hang in there.

Answer 10

It sounds to me like you really miss your Dad. I'm sorry this happened to you. Life is not kind sometimes. Your Mom probably missed him too and is trying to start over. I hope you were just cursing on the question and not really to them. If you are talking to them in this manner, no wonder you are having problems. I don't think anyone should use such language. You should quit being so rebellious and try to get to know this man your Mom loves. You might get along, if you try. As for your Mom, you are just mad at her for trying to start over. You should be ashamed and try to start over,too. Talk to your Mom and try to get along. It will make life a lot easier.

Answer 11

You should try to think of your mother a bit too. When i was young my father died, and we had to move several hrs away to live with my new step-dad. I know it can be rough on you just for a moment try putting yourself in your mothers shoes though. She just lost her husband, probably the love of her life, and now she is just trying to be happy.