My Thoughts About The Video On The Web About Children Misbehaving In Restaurants?

Question

I saw a video from ABC News on the web about children behaving in restaurants. When I was a youngster, I behaved that way. How about you? You know what would I do if I had children and they misbehave in restaurants, I would give them a warning and if they keep acting that way, they will be in the car full stop (I would roll up the windows if hot outside.). I learned that technique from ABC's Supernanny. To keep them occupied during the visit, I would have them bring crayons and coloring book and other stuff. Would you have a plan in place if you have children that misbehaves in restaurants (You would probably whip them but with all due respect, I am completely opposed to spanking; Spare the Rod, Spoil the Child, etc.)? What would you agree?

Answer 1

IF my daughter misbehaved in a arestaurant we would leave. We taught our daughter very early on to behave by taking her to "fancy" restaurants when she was young. We always had things to keep her occupied plus I always had a small stash of graham crackers, raisings, animal crackers, carrots because small children don't follow restaurant chef's schedules. I never allowed my daughter out of her seat to run around in a restuarant and very often have wanted to shake a few parents who do so. I once saw a beauitful little toddler all dressed pretty for easter run into a waitress carrying a tray of hot coffees wind up with it all over herself and 3rd degree burns because she was allowed to run around in a restaurant. If parents want to allow their kids to run around then they should take them to McPuke's or Burger Crap where they have the playland facilities, or to Chuck E Cheese where kids CAN play and run around.

Answer 2

My first thought I guess is, are you a parent? If not, it's easy
to say what you would do or would not do.

Regarding behavior, all children are going to misbehave from
time to time...but the degree to which they misbehave is in
direct correlation to the parenting skills of Mom and Dad.

Whether in a restaurant or in any other public place, children
must be taught how to behave, what to do and what not to
do. Yes, plenty of things to occupy them are needed. I can
remember being bored stiff as a child...but I also knew to behave and what would happen if I didn't.

As for spanking...or corporal punishment as some would
say...it works - but there MUST be plenty of love where it came from, and you seldom have to resort to it. There are other ways to go along with it, one of which you mentioned. These probably should be resorted to first. But personally, I never ruled spanking out.

My son was misbehaving in the back seat with a "Slinky" one day....my father in law warned him once, warned him twice....then calmly reached back and grabbed the slinky and threw it out the car window. I believe my son would rather have had a spanking than to lose his slinky. But he never misbehaved like that again.

If a parent's only means of discipline is spanking, hollering
and screaming at the child....yes I am opposed to it. But,
if you love your child and your child fully knows that, a little
spanking never caused anyone to be warped for life. It hurts the child's feelings a heck of a lot more than it hurts his behind.

People wonder why children are not behaving or respectful
like they use to be...its because too many parents have
quit being parents.

Answer 3

Well, I wasn't really spanked as a child, other than a few minor swats as a toddler. But I don't remember ever misbehaving like that in a restaurant. Probably because I knew we would leave immediately if I did and I would get to just eat a peanut butter sandwich that night for dinner instead! lol. I think most kids misbehave because their parents just don't set any rules for them or they don't plan accordingly and bring things to keep their child occupied. I see parents who just keep threatening their child but don't actually follow through, because it would be too inconvenient to actually leave! So they just sit there and finish their dinner and don't care that their child is getting away with acting like that and that the other diners are being disturbed. That is just rude.

However...why on earth would you leave your child in a hot car with the windows rolled up as punishment?? Have you not heard all the news stories about kids dying after being left in vehicles? Again, my parents weren't big spankers, so I'm not really for spanking either, but I have to say that "punishing" a child by locking them in a hot car is way worse than spanking! Not to mention, if someone saw you doing this they would likely report you to the police and you'd get arrested. Bad BAD idea.

Answer 4

I saw the one you're talking about, and I have to say that I agree with the restaurant owner. I didn't act that way when I was younger, bc my aunt and uncle (who raised me) taught me to respect other people and not act like a hellion. My kids (5 and 1) do not act that way, either, because we teach them right from wrong, and again, to RESPECT others. I would never leave them in a hot car, WTF is wrong with you? When my son was about 4 he was acting up at a restaurant and disrupting the other diners. I got onto him right there and made him apologize to the man he ran into. I understand that children aren't perfect all the damn time, but the other people there paid just as much for their food as I did, and they deserve the same respect and courtesey I expect from them. When I go out, I pay for the food, not to be annoyed by non parented brats. If I wanted to hear screaming and be pestered, I would stay home and eat for free. And I think you have the anology mixed up--if you spare the rod, you are spoiling the child--as in ruining the child. Parenting a child is a 24/7 365 deal--it doesn't come into play just when you go out--if you teach your kids at home, they are less likely to do wrong outside the home. Parenting begins at home.

Answer 5

I saw show that you are talking about, i as a server, see parents who let their children act like that, I will ask them to calm their child down and to sit down, It is out of respect for others in the restaurant. It is a danger for them to run around. I usually try and have some extra toys ( hot wheels ) to keep some kids busy. I learned that with my son. If I was sitting next to those kids I would have said something knowing that everyone else wanted to. And if it was my child, they would get spanked right there in-front of everyone. They know it is wrong to act like that at anytime, and do not get away with it. My son does get spanked in public...some do not like it, but it is what I see fit. and it works.

Answer 6

Ok I have a real problem with rolling up the windows in the car on a hot day!!! What the hell? Its supposed to be discipline not torture! I believe in a good swat on the butt to get their attention! When children get bored or have been sitting for a length of time they will get restless and act out. Thats when you redirect them to something like coloring books and such. If that doesnt work, I would take them into the restroom and have a stern talk with them. Persistant communication gets good results.

Answer 7

What's the link to the video.....I would love to see it. And as far as my own kids go, they get one warning, then if it still doesn't help, we go to the car, they get one last chance, then we leave. So far I haven't had any trouble with them past the first warning. I hold spankings for the REALLY bad stuff.......have only had to spank once with each child and even then it was a mild tap on the bottom--fully clothed. They still got the idea. I won't tell anyone how to raise their children (unless I actually see abuse). I feel that it's every parent's right to raise their children as they see fit. I know from experience that one punishment doesn't fit all.......

Answer 8

People watched in amazement when I would take my FIVE children to a restaurant because they all behaved like I expected them to. They sat quietly and ate their meals without running around, screaming and carrying on. They were polite, said please and thank you, used their napkins and enjoyed themselves without running amok.

How did I do this? I parented my children at home. Parents who have unruly children have them because all they do is yell and make threats to their children. The kids don't take them seriously. The parents don't have any control because they are lazy in execution when it comes down to disciplining that makes a difference.

I was consistent and spent all my time with my kids. I didn't expect them to do my work.

Over the years, I received many compliments on my children's behavior. People would walk right up to us and tell us how wonderfully behaved our children were. A no brainer for me.

What parents put into their children, they get out of them. It is that basic.

Answer 9

my son is just under 2 and he bahaves himself bc that is what we expect i would not put up with anything else we frequently go out to eat and he behaves every time we also go other places where i am in awe of how children act the other day at the grocery store there was a boy about 9 or 10 acting horribly running all over the place and the mother finaaly said something when i just about hit him cuz he darted in front of my cart i wanted to ask her why my son who is not even 2 can behave and her son can;t but i held my toungue one day i will ask someone though

Answer 10

Could you provide a link to the story so I can see the exact behavior that was being reported on?

We've taken our son into sit-down restaurants since he was born, so he has learned proper behavior. But if I felt his behavior was inappropriate or bothering other patrons, we would pack up our food and leave right away.