My son and husband have a new-found relationship. It's golf and I don't know anything about it.?

Question

I have always close to my son, but he always also wanted to be close to his dad. It finally happened when my son decided he liked golf like his dad did - here is the deal.

It has taken over our lives. That is all they talk and think about when together. Lately I have been laughed at when inquiring about their day at golf, I think they think it is wasting their time explaining (I assume, anyway). I try to engage, but don't think they want me to even be there when they get home from the course. They want to talk their talk and they are just trying to amuse me if they even go on about it... how I feel, anyway.

What now? How do I make it back into their lives as golfers when I'm not one? How do I make it OUR time, not tee time every day?

I have always, I mean.
Also, I know how to play golf. I took lessons in college, but don't enjoy it like they do. Sorry for all of the bad grammar.

Answer 1

you've touched on a mystery sister, GOLF! A man will give his eye teeth for a round!!! I'm an avid golfer and I can hardly wait for the day my son is old enough to chase the little white ball around!!!

My advice to you is go on the course with them. You can drive the cart, buy the snacks and generally make yourself useful!

If you want to hang with your son, then find a common interest with him, like your hubby has!!

My 2 cents. good luck.

Answer 2

I understand that you are feeling excluded. I know it's not easy to just let them have their time together when you're not a part of it.

Right now, your husband and son are "blinded" by golf - since it's fun for them, that's all they choose to see. To get them to see how you are feeling, you must first get their attention. To get their attention, you must speak their language. Right now, that language is golf. Here's some things I invite you to try:

1) Use golf talk. You mentioned that you've taken lessons before, so you must know some stuff about the game. When they get back, instead of asking them how it was, ask "Hey hit any hole-in-ones today?" (sorry, I'm no golfer myself.) This way, you show them that you do understand the game.

2) Use a positive remark, instead of a question. Instead of asking about their day, say "Hey, there, Tiger Woods!" It will get their attention in a good way, and they'll want to talk to you.

3) Join them, even if you don't play. You can watch and support them or take pictures. Then, you should have plenty to talk about, since you were there!

4) Golf with them. The easiest way to become included is to include yourself. Golf may not be your favorite thing, but even if you went a few times with them, they'll understand that you want to be a part of the activity.

5) If you want nothing to do with golf at all, then maybe you can find an activity that all of you like. One thing to remember here - all of you must be interested in it or else the same thing will happen as it's happening with golf and someone will feel left out. Maybe you can think of a time you all had fun together and try that out again. Or you can suggest something entirely new.

If you show that you're interested in them, they'll be more likely to consider what you're feeling, and they'll stop leaving you out. I know it will take some effort, but remember that they're your husband and son. They're worth it, and you deserve to be a part of their lives.

Answer 3

SOUND LIKE YOU'VE GOT A BIT OF JEALOUSY. THATS OK IT'S NORMAL, BUT YOUR ALSO STRESSED ABOUT IT.

FIRST TAKE TIME TO THANK GOD YOUR SON HAS HIS FATHER IN HIS LIFE. LOTS OF HOMES GET REALLY JACKED UP WITHOUT A MALE FIGURE.

SECOND SAY TO YOURSELF "IT'S OK FOR THEM TO HAVE THEIR "THING". (ALSO THEY ARE OBSESSED WHICH IS OK UNLESS IT PUTS YOUR FAMILY AT HARM)

THIRD IF IT'S BOTHERING YOU SO MUCH YOU HAVE TO ASK STRANGERS ON YAHOO WHAT TO DO, YOU REALLY SHOULD BE TALKING TO THEM. LET THEM KNOW YOU DONT WANT TO HEAR ABOUT GOLF ALL DAY. ASK THEM IF AS A FAMILY COULD WE DO SOMETHING EVERY FRIDAY EVENING BESIDES GOLF BECAUSE I'M NOT AS INTERESTED AS THE TWO OF YOU AND I FEEL A BIT LEFT OUT.

LAST LET YOUR HUSBAND KNOW YOUR FEELINGS. EVEN THOUGH IT MAY NOT FEEL LIKE HE'S YOUR BEST FRIEND NOW, HE SHOULD BE, SO TALK TO HIM LETTING HIM KNOW THAT YOU WANT SOME OF HIS TIME TOO. (HOLD HIS HAND WHEN YOU SAY IT, THEN SEAL IT ALL WITH A KISS)

GOOD LUCK!

Answer 4

Well it doesn't take all twenty four hours of the day to play golf. why don't u go watch ur son and dad play golf. Maybe you could slowly learn, and have fun watching!

Answer 5

tell them you think its the biggest waste of real estate (I do)

here's a golf joke they've probably heard:
two guys were on the 3rd hole about to tee off when off in the distance they spotted a funeral procession. One guy takes his hat off and places it over his heart. The other guy says " Did you know the deceased"? the first guy says "Know her, hell I was married 25 years to her">

Answer 6

it seems 2 me like ur jealous of ur husband. k, u and ur son got a thing ya'll like 2 do 2gether, u and ur husband got a thing ya'll like 2 do 2gether so why not give them space and let them bond. they'll give u a sign when they wanna hang wit u. juss give em space and let them have that father-son time.

Answer 7

YOU may just half to show interest in golf to gain their interest. good luck. THEY sound like children to me both of them.

Answer 8

let them have their time togeather.
you don't have to be in on it. not everything should involve you. go about your business and be happy they are having a good time.

Answer 9

take lessons i got them

Answer 10

SELL THRER CLUB SAY THEY WAS STOLD