I like it when it rains cuz no one can tell that i'm crying,
I know people want to see me i know their just trying,
Cuz i've got tares in my heart,
and i've got tears in my eyes,
and I know that i'm not alone!!
2007-03-23 12:28:28 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Education & Reference ➔ Quotations
This is my first poem so I know I need work!
2007-03-23 12:35:19 · update #1
sounds very insightful.
2007-03-23 17:08:54 · answer #1 · answered by fox mulder 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are many definitions of good. It can be good to you personally, and I can tell you that this kind of good will be all this poem will ever be. I have been studying poetry for quite some time, and I would challenge you to buy some books and attend some workshops on writing poetry. It is an art, but it takes research and practice. Its not something everyone can do, just like playing in the NBA or becoming a ballet dancer. Most people just don't have it and will never have it no matter how much they try.
But a point to consider, subtlety, subtlety is always a good way to approach a subject in a poem. Your poem is an overt complaint about your poor pitiful self. People will not appreciate reading poetry like this. Try to make it universal, i.e. not just about you. And choose a particular image to build a poem around. Perhaps write about watching a bird getting pelted in the rain trying to get cover under a few leaves and that image relates to how you feel, instead of directly telling the audience I feel like xyz. I don't know how old you are, but I assume very young, but keep up your interest and read all the poetry you can get your hands on.
2007-03-23 12:45:45 · answer #2 · answered by Blake T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dang com, thats a beatiful poem you got there. I think that first and on the second last line shouldn't be there. Other than that, that's a pretty poem.
2007-03-23 12:38:23 · answer #3 · answered by Robby M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you write something that comes from your heart and deep within your soul, only then will you question it's validity. The heart always speaks the truth.
2007-03-24 00:21:41 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Great answer Green eyes. Poetry is a form of personal expression. Who are we to judge your thoughts and feelings?
2007-03-23 12:36:45 · answer #5 · answered by oilerfan 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Pretty good. Reminds me of the old Temptations Song "I wish it would rain" (link below)
2007-03-23 16:19:28 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It started out ok. You should definitely spell check. And practice before you even think about publishing.
2007-03-23 12:34:14 · answer #7 · answered by littlechrismary 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Poetry is personal.
NEVER ask for approval of your poetry.
NEVER write poetry for other's approval
It is an art form, and it is beautiful no matter what others think.
2007-03-23 12:32:39 · answer #8 · answered by ♥ 1 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Beautiful.
Don't stop.
Write from your heart as you do now.
Look around.
Write from your soul.
2007-03-23 12:36:02 · answer #9 · answered by mim 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ok ok
2007-03-23 12:36:43 · answer #10 · answered by r1114@sbcglobal.net 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋