Why do people get jealous or posessive of their sexual partners?

Question

You aren't jealous if your friends have other friends. But if your sex partner (bf/gf/spouse) has sex with someone else, it's called "cheating."

Why is that? What's the difference?

This is a serious question. If you could honestly try to analyze or explain the reason(s) that you feel that way, I would really appreciate it.

Answer 1

Life experiences have taught me the following.
All too often folks, both men and women confuse sex, which is a physical need. with love which is an emotion. Two entirely different things.
Great sex is possible with complete strangers or with a significant other. Conversely terrible sex is just as possible in either situation as well.

Answer 2

To me jealousy is just a stupid thing which solves nothing.
Cheating between boyfriend/girlfriend relationships isn't cheating. Just because your going with them your still free. However, if your in a sexual relationship with them you are open to all the diseases in the system and there is quite a lot of them, most were curable but now there are a few that are not like herpes and hiv.

With a spouse its different you make vows to forsake all others. If your not ready to keep a vow, than don't marry.
However, people like the comfort, constancy, and security of a real home life which not only makes the partners feel secure but gives the children security.
When you can't keep the vows you see families in chaos which you see more nowadays because 50% of the population can't keep a vow and the poor kids suffer because of the selfishness of the parents.
Again there is a chance of getting some catastrophic disease and to give that to someone you vowed to love is way past jealousy your into betrayal. It's really down to people not keeping a simple promise anymore.

Answer 3

People will answer that they feel betrayed, hurt, etc because the person made a commitment to them and broke that commitment and so on and so forth.

What it comes down to is, society and people have developed moral rules and values over thousands of years. So people are taught from birth that relationships should be faithful and they should be devastated if they are not.

If society had different rules and people were taught from birth to mate like animals i.e. find a partner, do the nasty, and part ways without a second thought, then nobody would care.

The real question is why has society developed these rules and where did they come from? That's something you'd have to study throughout history. Some people will tell you it's a result of following the bible or something similiar.

Answer 4

We are a very social animal...aside from that, sex is a big intrinsic need within us. Sex is, generally, an act that makes relationships more intimate than a friendship without sex.

Cheating is only cheating if it is "understood" (whether it is implied or explicitly stated--in many cultures it is automatically implied that you don't have sex with other partners--unless it is agreed and understood by both) and agreed by both that they will not have sex with other partners.

Some partners don't want their partner having sex with others because of the issues of STDs, "accidental" pregnancy, and the emotional infidelity that can potentially make a relationship end or become more complicated. Couples become couples for a variety of reasons. They want to have children; they want to work to become financially secure for their elder years--a couple has more success at this than a single person, especially if children are involved; etc.

Answer 5

Friend with benefits: You get down with the get down, there physically and in some cases emotionally but there is no commitment to one another just a helping hand.

Bf/Gf/Spouse: You pretty much make it official/Commitment. When you are in a relationship with meaning there shouldnt be a reason to look around for more a**.

Conclusion: If you want you cake and eat it too stay SIngle! No one and nothing can hold you back from doing what you want! Makes life much easiar.

Answer 6

To you having a sex partner is just having someone to have sex with. But most people whether they want to admit it or not feel like they form a bond with someone when they have sex. So to them it is cheating, because deep down they really want more than just sex.

I tried just to have a friend with benefits once and I couldn't separate my emotions. I was hurt more by that relationship then by any other.

At least for most women, sex is tied to the heart.

Answer 7

Well it is because there is a different emotional attatchment in a sex or love relationship rather then a friend relationship.
It is good if you or the other person gets jealous of you cheating physically or with your eyes. They want you (and hopefully the other way around) to be theirs and no one elses it is a good thing if this happens

Answer 8

It's all about intimacy, sex is not something you have with "just" anyone. When people become lovers, they bond in a special way...just like animals do. Well we are animals right? If you have a regular sex partner of course you will feel some sort of possession...if you want to or not...It's normal and expected.

Answer 9

If you are in a relationship and have a commitment with another person it is cheating if you sleep with someone else. But as far as why your partner is jealous-maybe you dont give her a reason not to be jealous.

Answer 10

Instinct. Nature has designed us to try to pass our genes on to future generations. If we weren't possessive, there would be no telling whose genes were passed on. And since raising a child is very expensive and time-consuming, we - as part of the animal kingdom - want to make sure that the child we are spending all this effort on is really ours. We can theorize about emotional bonds, religious taboos, social pressures and the like - and they are all valid to an extent - but nature is the root cause.