My bf of 9 months has a demanding job as a project manager for a contsruction company. He is on the field for 8 to 10 hours being pulled in all directions. He does try to call me during the day to say "hi," but somtimes it's after 2:00 and i haven't heard from him. He's a completely different person after work though. He calls me a lot, but during the day, he's a completely different person. Should I be hurt that he sometimes doesn't call until late in the day?
2007-03-23 12:11:26 · 12 answers · asked by wotevu 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
No, it sounds like he's focusing on his work when he's at work. By expecting him to call all the time, you're just setting yourself up for a huge disappointment. Especially since it sounds like he cares for you a great deal.
There's something in what you say that makes it sound like you may have a fear of abandonment. You seem to expect him to call you every day whenever he gets a break, and if he doesn't then you equate that with him not caring about you. This isn't a rational belief.
Obviously, there is no way he can spend all of his day thinking about you. He has to spend time worrying about his job and his own problems. Like you say, he's a project manager with a lot of demand placed upon him. The fact is that when he's done with work and his problems he stops to talk to you.
I think you're just scaring yourself. You're so worried that he'll stop loving you that you're putting the wrong meaning to his 'day' behavior. It's time to stop before you drive yourself nuts. Focus on the good points, and trust that he will call when he can. Right now you're just beating yourself up. It's not fair on him, and it's not fair on you, either.
2007-03-23 13:13:05 · answer #1 · answered by stedh1 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You already answered your own question right there hon. He has a demanding job, and he does try to call you. Thats more than what most men do. And hey, after work and such, he's probably tired. Being a Project Mgr for a Construction Co. isnt exactly a stress free job. So in the evening, let him unwind, relax, his job is stressful enough. You dont need to worry.
Might I suggest giving him a back rub a massage, hell even telling him to just sit back and you have him soak his feet in some epsom salt, and you give him a foot rub. Trust me, he'd totally appreciate that. And its not a sexual thing either.
Try to put yourself in his shoes, 8 to 10 hours in a demanding job. Imagine how you'd feel.
2007-03-23 19:19:50 · answer #2 · answered by jeff the drunk 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you already understnad the demands of his job, so take it for what it is, nothing personal. I want to call my wife everyday from work but just cant find a moment to do it, dont be hurt, if he stops calling you after work then worry, untill then keep being that understanding person you seem to be, he will love youo all the more.
2007-03-23 19:16:40 · answer #3 · answered by Papa Joe 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no not at all. I'm sure your boyfriends is going through the same pain not being able to call you until later. I'm sure he loves you and really wants to call you but you know how it is. you never know when something might come up when he would normally call. don't worry.
he has to be a different person at work. he has to be more professional and serious to keep his job, i would be proud of him.
i would be totally estatic that he calls you from work, its a real tough situation for him and he's still thinking about you!
2007-03-23 19:15:43 · answer #4 · answered by sarabearr 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He already has a demanding job. Does he really need a demanding gf too? Enjoy the time he can give you. Busy men will dump girls who can't understand the pressures of their jobs and exchange them for women who do.
2007-03-23 19:16:22 · answer #5 · answered by Shepherd 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he has a demandinmg job right ???
trust u av all to grateful for if it were some other guy they would probably be tinking of themself and getting even sleep for the hassle that is yet to come..
what i see in him is a bf trying to talk to u as much as possible in the little time he has available..
2007-03-23 19:19:52 · answer #6 · answered by sweet_oreo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i wouldn't. if he works hard on his job, it's a great quality that he focuses on that and feels good about himself. i am a completely different person at work and at home. it's actually a good sign that he calls when he's off work and thinking about you. how good is that!
2007-03-23 19:15:14 · answer #7 · answered by xyz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For god sake woman he's at work ...If one of my employees was on the phone to his insecure girl friend all the time I'd be pissed ...DO NOT BE HURT!!!!!!!!Be thankful he is working..And he always comes home to you
2007-03-23 19:18:32 · answer #8 · answered by huckleberrie 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No you could be mature. He has a job, you don't. Think about it. Everything in its place.
2007-03-23 19:14:00 · answer #9 · answered by Jim R 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no way he would much rather talk to you than work he's just busy don't worry about it
2007-03-23 19:15:46 · answer #10 · answered by krasy k 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋