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My boyfriend and I have been dating for 1 ½ years. It’s been pretty rough recently and we have been fighting almost everyday for the last month or so. He went on vacation with his family and since he’s been gone he told me that he needs time to think and didn’t know if he wanted to try to make it work. Then he told me that he was no longer in love with me. But, the next day he called and told me that he is in love with me but he feels like we have different values. Yet again the next time we spoke we decided to “work it out”, but he kept emphasizing that we weren’t in a relationship. He has taken me off his myspace/facebook and has what looks like a dating add up, even though it still says were in a relationship. I feel like his yo yo, and I don’t know what to do. PLEASE HELP!!!

2007-03-23 12:06:05 · 13 answers · asked by Confused 1 in Family & Relationships Singles & Dating

13 answers

You only get what you think you are worth. That was the best advice ever given to me, its so simple.
Do you think you are worth somebody deciding you are not worth fully being with? Are you worth somebody who wants to keep you an the back burner untill something they like more comes around?
Anyone can use that "we have different values aproach" or "I just feel we need to date other people" but in reality what they are saying is simple, "although I love you, I don't think you are right for me but I am to scared (or pick another great term) to be alone."
Its hard to break up, it rips out your heart. It also makes you think of the person differently than what they really are.
So make it simple, decide what you are worth. Are you worth more than what this person is willing to give you? If you answered yes, move on and find somebody who can give you what you believe you deserve - somebody who has the same "values" as you do!

2007-03-23 12:16:09 · answer #1 · answered by Chasity 2 · 0 0

I think that he probably isnt sure what he wants. Which in anycase is bad especially if your in a relationship. It's obvious that you love him, but if he was really in love with you then he would try to work it out. When you truly love someone it doesnt flip flop depending on the day. You would be willing to go through hell to ensure that whatever the problem is it would be resolved. Then he took you off of his myspace and facebook? If he took u off of facebook he must've wanted everyone to know it was over, you know how those damn mini feeds are(i hate those-it tells everyone your business). But i can really relate. Unfortunently I am on the other end of this one. My bf loves me but I am not to sure. We have been through a lot and one day I love him but the next day I dont. And finally I had to realize if I had to question my feelings for him it wasn't worth it. I would be hurting him more going back and forth. So I decided to let him go. And the worst part is it was the hardest thing I had to do, but I know it was the right thing. So all I can say is follow your heart. but from my personal standpoint, you may need to just move on if he cant get his head together.

2007-03-23 19:17:47 · answer #2 · answered by carolina gyrl 3 · 0 0

If you really care about this young man, give him some space and time to get over his confusion. It will be good for the both of you to have a break from each other because it can't be healthy for the relationship fighting all the time. You really have to work out your differences, because you don't want to go through life together, if you make a commitment to each other, fighting every day.

2007-03-23 19:15:17 · answer #3 · answered by Alwyn C 5 · 0 0

He told you he is no longer in love with you....he wouldn't say this if it weren't true. However he realized without you he can't get laid (assuming you two are sexually active), so he wants to try and make amends and lead you to believe that there is still something there so that he can get laid but not have to commit to a relationship. Sounds like a dog..dump him. Not a healthy relatoinship when you are fighting everyday and he tells you he doesn't want to work it out.

2007-03-23 19:12:50 · answer #4 · answered by TI 2 · 0 0

Sounds to me like he really wants his freedom and doesn't want to be in a committed/ monogamous relationship. Yet at the same time it seems he wants to keep a connection to you (might be ego? might be fear he won't find someone else?) so he can reel you back on whim.

Dont call him, don't write him, dont chase after him. Go live your life, get very busy and give him the distance he says he wants.

How can he miss you if you are still there?

Give it a month and then re-assess how YOU feel.

2007-03-23 19:16:26 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Do you like being treated like this and feeling this way?

If so please continue what you are doing, it's working great.

If not then it is time for A-C-T-I-O-N. This relationship is not working for you. It is NOT going to work for you. You are being driven nuts when you could be out there meeting someone who wouldn't do this to you.

Hint: try the shy guys.

2007-03-23 19:11:35 · answer #6 · answered by outlaw_tattoo_biker 4 · 0 0

He's playing with your feelings. Call it quits with this guy. He's a jerk. You'll find someone else who's nicer. He acts like he doesn't know what he really wants, which is a signal for you to go your own way.

2007-03-23 19:13:38 · answer #7 · answered by Suzie 4 · 0 0

well hes really bi polar. he knows your an eassy target he acts like he can like you when he wants and throw you away when e doesnt. set him straight tell him you dont like his stye your either together or not?! and he if he says i dont know say im threw with you

itll be hard i know but try not to show him your vulnerable
best luck =]

2007-03-23 19:11:33 · answer #8 · answered by your a joke... spell it? 3 · 0 0

Seems as if its over.
Sorry for the bad news.
He is just ignoring you by saying..wait i'm thinking.
You know he dosen't care right>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

2007-03-23 19:11:28 · answer #9 · answered by maggpuppy 1 · 0 0

i say you both should sit down and talk it out...it seems u really LUV him...dont let the one you really love slip away...i had that happen to me and i tell u, u will be thinkin about that "one" who slipped away day after day after....

2007-03-23 19:11:46 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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