Is it inappropriate to go out drinking with an ex or am I overreacting?

Question

My girlfriend made plans to go drinking with her ex boyfriend for this Saturday. They are going with a couple of his friends.

I don't have a lot of relationship experience, but I'm pretty sure it's not considered appropriate to go out drinking with an ex. I could easily stop her from doing anything that would instantly end our relationship by coming along, but I'd almost rather have her screw up now rather than wait until we're married and she's messing around with other guys.

She told me that when she drinks she gets turned on, so I suspect the worst results to happen this Saturday.

What do you think? Should I go along or let some disaster happen now rather than later? Are her actions inappropriate or am I overreacting?

Answer 1

You need to relax and tell her that this is making you uncomfortable. Tell her that you trust her, but because alcohol does things to her and to her mind you'd rather that she didn't go. If she truly cares about you then the two of you will talk it out and come to a reasonable agreement. It's obvious that you care about this girl. No matter what happens Saturday the two of you will be just fine.

Answer 2

It's VERY inappropriate for her to be going out drinking with an ex and is disrespectful to you. Alcohol takes away peoples inhibitions and I could bet dollars to donuts, those drinks will bring up fun times they used to have and the obvious physical attraction they once had for each other. Drinking does strange things to otherwise very level headed people. You either need to go along and/or she really never should have asked to go. If she is THAT interested in seeing an ex, then why is he an ex? And if they are still interested in each others lives, then I think that a mutual dinner or lunch involving all would be appropriate to catch up. Anything they couldn't say or do in front of you they shouldn't be doing or saying anyway and I think even asking for a lunch or dinner to catch up really is going too far itself.

Answer 3

You do have reason to be worried. Ask her before she leaves if she still has feelings for this guy. The important thing is to belive her if she tells you she doesn't. Don't be the control freak, that will freak her out and then something really may happen, because she'll get mad at you...(or I would)


Just ask her if she still has feelings for her and if she says no, respect it. If she does something that ruins your relationship with her now, then that is her decision and it's better it happened before you two were married.

Answer 4

Did she invite you along? If so, then go - she's obviously not planning on anything happening - and doesn't want it to.

If she is going and didn't invite you - then dont go. You have to trust her. If she screws up, then atleast you know now that she's not trustworthy. If you have no reason not to trust her, then let her go - but let her know it bothers you. I mean, if you went drinking with an ex how would she feel? Ya know?

Answer 5

It depends on how much you trust your g/f. I also get horny when I drink but that does not equate hooking up for a girl. That just means we will prob go f@$%k the hell out of our b/f if we are not to plastered when we getto him.lol My past relationship ended because AI loved going out and my b/f always thought i was cheating.. I never did. But he never trusted me. So it is up to you if you trust her, but I can tell you if you tell her no it will put agreat crappy strain on your relationship.

Answer 6

Do you love her? Does she love you? Why would she want to go out with her ex-boyfriend?

Answer 7

i would just ask her to turn the situation around and see if she has a problem with it. also if it is harmless why cant you go

Answer 8

don know
if going out make sure u bring fresh new batteries

Answer 9

sounds inappropriate. but you have to have trust.