I've been with my fiancé for 3 years now, and things were fine with his mom the first 2 weeks when I loved in with them. Then she did a 360° change on me, and started to really ruin my love life. Well, she hates me bc her son no longer gives her money like he used to. He used to pay all the bills, food, etc, and when I moved in I made him stop. So to get back at me she makes up stories, calls my man's ex gfs, and talks about me behind my back.
Fortunately we moved out 6 months later into my parents home, and things are great now. Except that she still haunts us, she calls for money (but gets none lol).
I really hate her, what should I do. I can't imagine myself forgiving her for all the crap she put me through. I've never cheated on her son, I cook and clean for him, I give him everything, he has more with me than he's ever had before.
HELP SOMEONE, what should I do with this pain in the @$$ mother in law?!
2007-03-23 09:06:22 · 8 answers · asked by PinkRose 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I'm in the EXACT situation!! It's ridiculous and I can't stand it.. She's a complete loser that doesn't work and ALWAYS calls my bf for money to support her ***.. it's just ridiculous. I told him that he needed to cut all ties when it comes to giving her money and that she needs to get off her *** to get a job!!!
He talked to her and she actually got pissed off at him and stopped talking to him for months.. I've even talked to her and she just completely ignores the fact that she's a loser and needs to get her own job if she wants to continue to support her alcohol habits!! but he doesnt give her money anymore and to be honest with you, i could careless what the hell she says about me..
I give my bf my all... exactly what you said and more and she still treats me like complete ****.. I dont care anymore.. she needs to face the fact that im in her son's life whether she likes it or not.. You're lucky cause his father is even worse than this!!!!
2007-03-23 09:37:07 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
This is just my approach, but I've come to learn that efforts made to understand the possibilities DOES go a positive long way towards easing negative feelings of hate/resentment.
The mystery is why mom in law can't pay her own bills--which greatly were reduced when you and her son moved out. Is there some physical/mental challenge of hers that won't allow her to work for a living, assuming she's single. Or are there darker reasons she does all these nasty things when turned down for $$$ by her son; is she addicted to illegal drugs or alcohol???
Whatever reason, it's unfortunately sad your man's mother has such a dependency on him and feels overwhelmingly threatened by your approaching marriage to him.
Brace for impact as wedding day nears, for she's sure to get even nastier and nastier still afterwards and years on.
If she doesn't have the sense to get into the honest workforce and/or find a rich "sugar-daddy", she's really not worth the focus of you, me or anyone else.
2007-03-23 16:19:46 · answer #2 · answered by Mr. Wizard 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi
Well for starters as long as you hold a grudge in your heart towards his mom you will always be haunted by this . I would let it go . His mom was wrong for telling lies on you to her son and others because he is a grown man and can make his own choices .
As far as the financial situation he is supposed to be a help to his mom but at the same time he also has his own responsibilities . I feel that maybe the mother is carrying negative feelings because the money stopped and may also feel abandoned by her son .
I would be the bigger , better person and let it go .
Good luck with everything
C
2007-03-23 16:20:32 · answer #3 · answered by Constance M 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well to tell the truth my mother in law and I don't see eye to eye either. Matter of fact I think that the movie "monster in law" is a fitting idea of her!! What I have done is have my husband do most of the communicating with her. Also, we have agreed to disagree about most things. This is not to say that she holds up her end of the bargain! What this boils down to is you can't change her, you can only change you. Whether that is trying to change how you feel towards her, how you react towards her, etc.. You are only hurting yourself when you are angry and bitter. Do you think she gives a hoot if your upset?! Hope this helps and GOOD LUCK!@!!
2007-03-23 16:14:33 · answer #4 · answered by Stacy S 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just give her the facts without the hatred. You can get along with her without the financial aid. You must forgive because if you don't your character is what is effected and you are a very kind hearted person and one day his mom shall see this and thank you for those kind things you have done for her...
2007-03-23 16:12:45 · answer #5 · answered by *DestinyPrince* 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately when it comes to your man's family the only you can do is be respectful to her. If it was anyone else I'd say to stick up for your self but it's a difficult situation especially when you're talking about his mother.
2007-03-23 16:11:43 · answer #6 · answered by ljoc421 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well she was good enough to let you live in her house, and why wasn't your boyfriend giving her money for bills and food when you lived there???? You sound pretty ungrateful to me.
2007-03-23 16:11:54 · answer #7 · answered by Stuck in the middle of nowhere 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
what does your fiance have to say about all of this? maybe he can talk to her, and tell her to stop all that ****.
good luck
ljoc421 is right, you did live with her, both of you should've given her rent money at least.!
2007-03-23 16:10:48 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋