Eventhough me and this guy are seeing each other, we still haven't spent much time together getting to know one another and testing positive for pregnancy doesn't seem like it's going to help either. I'm planning to keep the baby.
2007-03-23 09:05:26 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
Tell him, his life is runied
2007-03-23 09:09:01 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 4⤋
well i am glad to hear you are not terminating your pregnancy. I have 7 wonderfully, beautiful, and smart adopted siblings, that are only alive because someone else made the same choice. Telling the father, well, no matter how you do it, it is going to be a surprise/shock. Just make sure you include in your "announcement" that you are just as surprise/shocked as he is but at the same time you are excited, and anxtious. Talk about the wonderful parts of parenting, put a major positive spin on this to help soften the blow. You never know he could be crazy happy about it. I don't know if you are religious, but I would pray about it, alot.
Just sit him down and tell him, in an atmosphere that you know he is listening to you and not distracted. Unless you think he is totally going to go crazy mad, then maybe in a public place or at a gathering. lol. Turn down an alcoholic drink in front of him, or caffine, maybe he will ask you why and you could then tell him....i am sorry to say i have never been in your situation. I was pregnant once but lost it before even finding out. So I am a survivor of the sad side that your body can take. First maybe a good question is are you out of the water yet??? you know, everything is not totally for sure until about 3 months along, so becareful how many people know. I would not wish this on anyone, but if something is going to go wrong, it is usually within the first Trimester, just keep this in mind. He needs to know now, but maybe keep things quiet until you are out of the woods.
Good Luck and Congrats.
2007-03-23 10:16:29 · answer #2 · answered by casady96 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, this is very familiar b/c me and my now husband went through this. We were together about 3 months, and then I wound up pregnant. His first reaction was that we were meant to be, should get married. But I felt like he was jumping the gun and reality didn't set in yet for him.
He is a very intense dramatic person, part of what I love about him. But I actually took myself out of the picture, and let him adjust to it. He knew I was keeping the baby b/c I wanted to, not to try and trap him. It was VERY hard for me to remain his friend when I knew I was in love with him, and he was seeing other people.
We stayed friends though, and around the time my son was 5 months old, we started spending more and more time together again, not just so he could see his son. Now we have 4 kids and have been married almost 5 years.
I think me giving him space made him realize I was doing it for me, and even though I loved him I would've let him go. That did make him trust me all the more, and he does admire that I did that.
So make sure to not pressure him in any way, explain that you're keeping the baby, that it is up to him what his role will be, if you do love him, tell him that, but tell him you understand what a shock this must be and give him space if he needs it. Desperation is a HUGE turnoff, and it will only make him want to get away instead of winding up trapped.
2007-03-23 09:19:33 · answer #3 · answered by nymom 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well congrats! It's a beautiful thing to have a baby. I think you just need to tell him and take that chance. I mean you'll really find out about your relationship. I know first hand what your going through me and my man were only seeing each other 1 month picture that call from the doctors office. But i knew i was keeping her no matter how he reacted. And know we wouldn't change it for the world. Honey its you and the baby now and the baby is the only thing that matters. If he stays around that's great but your about to be a mom, enjoy every minute. Good luck mommy!!!!!!
2007-03-23 09:49:53 · answer #4 · answered by missy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best way to break it to him is be straight forward and tell him you took a pregnancy test and got a positive reading. Go to the Dr. to confirm it, you may ask him to go with you. Since you are planning on keeping the baby you need to face the fact that this guy is a part of your life forever now, regardless of the route the relationship take. Hopefully he is mature enough to accept responsibility for his actions. Good luck.
2007-03-23 09:17:08 · answer #5 · answered by Just D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a tough situation. When it happened to me I just disappeared and never said a word, well until my daughter was a year old. The best thing to do is be straight with him. He will be angry at first but at least you will know where you two stand in raising the child. It will give him enough time to calm down before the baby is born. Good luck to you and if you need any help with resources to help in your pregnancy or even after the baby is born email me and I will see what I can do.
2007-03-23 09:09:40 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I went through the same thing. You just have to tell him. There is no fun or cute way about it. I called my man and told him I needed to talk to him. So, he came over and I just handed him the test. He looked like a deer in headlights for a second because he didn't know what the hell he was looking at. So, I had to tell him what it was. He was shocked for a few days. But, now we're good. Just try to take your time with the relationship and try not to rush things too much as far as the relationship is considered. I'm almost 22 weeks now, and we're doing great.
2007-03-23 09:42:43 · answer #7 · answered by *karasi* 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are sure this is what you want, then you should just go ahead and tell him that.
Tell him that you want to keep the baby and that you hope he can be there for his child, just don't count on that because you know it might not work out.
I was a single mom for three years and I can tell you that it's all gonna be all right, just focus on your baby and relax.
GOOD LUCK!
2007-03-23 09:11:03 · answer #8 · answered by mother_of_three_ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends, if you think he will not flip out, I would just say you have something to tell him and hand him the test, or, you can just tell him. I wrapped my test up and gave it to him with a note that says "You are going to be a daddy". But if you think that will not go over well. Just tell him.
Either way, you need to let him now now, don't wait.
2007-03-23 10:13:21 · answer #9 · answered by blebert2002 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well you need to tell him ASAP because the longer you wait the more upset he will probally be because you didnt say anything...ALSO you need to sit him down when you tell him about being pregnant and what your relationship is going to be after that because if he doesnt want to stay with you or take care of the baby then your best without him save the stress from coming later on.
2007-03-23 09:11:42 · answer #10 · answered by sjeboyce 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just tell him, he will either support you or he won't. I know that isn't a great answer, but it's the truth and I would get it out in the open as soon as possible so that he can deal with it. Good luck.
2007-03-23 09:09:54 · answer #11 · answered by BeThAnY 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋