My boyfriend and I joke about getting married all the time. Knowing that I'd surely say yes if he did ask I always tell him that you don't have to marry someone to spend you lives together. We've both already been married twice, and I'm too afraid to ask him myself. Should I not worry about getting married? I can't help but to dream about it.
2007-03-23 09:02:55 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Nothing changes? getting married is that special commitment to someone. now alot of people really could care less about it, but it is a bond that only 2 people can share together (unless you live in utah). you get to be on the family insurance, you get to wear a ring, the honeymoon?!?! im not married, never been, but dang, i truly love the woman i've given my heart to. i dream of that moment i will finally be able to call her my wife. yea you dont have to get married, you can be together the rest of your life, but what is that? be 60 and say to a friend "you want to go to bingo? let me ask my boyfriend of 40 years"? you say you've both been married twice, and maybe the next time he jokes about the two of you getting married, tell him how you truly feel. you tell him that you dont have to marry someone, but how do you feel?
2007-03-30 20:31:43 · answer #1 · answered by Redskins Baby! 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If you've been married twice (is that once for each of you or twice each?) you ought to know that marriage is not just a piece of paper, duh.
You know yourself divorce is the way it ends and divorce is no day at the beach. It's harder to leave a marriage than to walk out the door.
What do you know about social security benefits? Of the two of you, if one of you fell sick, whose health insurance would cover the extensive costs of recovering (if you survived whatever it was) and to whom would your estate go if you didn't survive? Do you know what an estate is? Do you have an IRA? Do you think you will be able to 80 years old and put food in your mouth based on the money you have saved now? Do you think about the future?
Either you are incredibly sophisticated about all of this and know because you have dealt with lawyers and know your rights and obligations - in which case, great! Or you are clueless. You live in the moment, think you are a teenager and shacking up and playing house is the same as marriage.
If you (either of you) have children, it's really important to be married - for all the reasons above and more. But I'm assuming you don't. You just need to learn about all this stuff if you haven't yet - your question makes me think you are dreaming about a wedding, not commitment. All of the legal rights and obligations come from commitment.
You can have all of these things addressed by seeing a lawyer and putting everything legally in place without marriage as much as you can. Divorce is hard because marriage is such a strong institution to begin with. When you walk out the door and there is no marriage, there are hard feelings and heartache but you're pretty much where you started to begin with otherwise.
One would think you had never been married! How did all this escape your notice?
2007-03-31 02:33:34 · answer #2 · answered by kathyw 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You look to assume that the ones emotions of infatuation you had early on your courting final ceaselessly. They do not and also you must be blissful. Living with butterflies could be laborious. Love deepens, grows and alterations in the course of a wedding. Mature married love is BETTER than butterflies on your belly. Real love is a deep understanding, believe, and companionship in which you'll depend at the different individual to maintain you and also you for him. Those emotions of affection ebb and float for the duration of marriage; in many instances they're very powerful, in many instances they're weaker. The dedication you may have made earlier than God and your households is what maintains you going for the duration of occasions whilst the affection feels weaker. But, relaxation confident, it'll come again and on the whole even more potent. Concentrate at the nice characteristics your husband has. Think approximately his well individual and why you married him. Don't seem for the ones emotions of infatuation--that is schoolgirl stuff. What you may have now could be greater.
2016-09-05 13:30:39 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
marriage , is the only natural connection between a man and a woman . and about that you've been married twice before , has nothing to do with this , if you had a bad luck twice before does not mean , that all marriage are the same , there are millions and millions of happy marriages , the most important things in marriage are faithfulness and honesty if they are exist , I think the marriage will be very successful .
2007-03-31 07:56:52 · answer #4 · answered by m 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If u have both been married twice in the past then dont get married...if you really want to then wait at least 10 years.
2007-03-31 00:22:42 · answer #5 · answered by fajita 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since you both been married already, you know the good and bad sides of it. If you both truly love each other, then you should get married. Hopefully both of your experiences can actually make this marriage work. Good luck.
2007-03-31 08:58:28 · answer #6 · answered by bluegirl5 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have answered your own question and you explained it further with the word: I am afraid to ask... etc.
You are experienced with broken marriage. You know why and why not to get married.
I will not go into major shpieeeeel.......but marriage is necessary to show each other that you are committed for life. It is something you tell each other in front of God, friends, family and others as witnesses.
2007-03-23 09:12:13 · answer #7 · answered by Nightrider 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If "nothing really changed" the first two times you were married, that's a good start on explaining why those marriages ended. Don't do it again.
2007-03-23 09:08:31 · answer #8 · answered by wmp55 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
My insurance will cover her if we got married.
2007-03-30 19:41:42 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
marrige is better for u faliure twice dosent mean everafter
2007-03-31 08:59:20 · answer #10 · answered by lilbluemag 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋