I don't have that Father/Daughter relationship with my dad. As a matter of fact, I really don't have any relationship with him. When my financee called to get his blessing he left my dad a message requesting a return call. My dad waited a month to call me- not my financee- back. He was drunk and told me he wanted to make him "sweat it out", make him think about it first, so now he is saying its ok, he'll allow it. My dad hasn't given my financee a chance, if he took the time to get to know him he would see how wonderful he is. I was upset by this call and wonder if I should not let him give me away. Am I being to harsh?
2007-03-23 08:43:03 · 21 answers · asked by dynamicduo79 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I got married last September. I also do not have the best relationship with my father. However, I let him give me away because even though he may not show it, its an important event for him. When you think about it, it only lasts for a moment. You will be more focused on the wonderful man waiting at the alter to really worry about who is walking next to you.
2007-03-23 08:48:31 · answer #1 · answered by rhythm_3b 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You should have whoever you want walk you down the isle. Obviously, I don't know anyone in the situation enough to make any difinative statements, but your dad sounds like a jerk. He doesn't seem like he's taking this seriously and if he'd had respect for you and your fiance he would have called sooner, and sober. I'm assuming you two are adults so it's not like you couldn't get married without his blessing- and he was asked for a blessing, not permission. What did he think your fiance would do if he refused? Not marry you?
If there's a relative that you're particularly close to or a good friend that's not in the wedding party- ask them to walk you down the isle. It doesn't have to be your dad and they don't have to be male. Have someone you care about give you away- it'll have more meaning then.
2007-03-23 16:23:18 · answer #2 · answered by K S 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't feel guilty about not having your father give you away at your wedding. If he's acting like that over a phone call just to give a blessing and on top of that called drunk! I wouldn't give him the honor of walking me down the aisle. I would suggest a brother or grandfather or someone really close to you. Congradulations on the engagment/wedding. It's your day enjoy it and don't feel guilty!
2007-03-23 08:55:36 · answer #3 · answered by Babe 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It seems a shame, but better not have your dad as a major part of your wedding ceremony. He might be drunk that day and decide to pull some kind of hijinks and make a fiasco of the tradition of giving away the bride. Of course he might pull some stunt in protest, because he is not giving you away, you just never know what a drunk is going to do. (Lots of us here have had experience with them)
It no longer means anyone "owns" the bride; even brides in their 30's who have been living with their fiances for years, do the giving-away thing. It is just part of the show.
2007-03-23 08:52:13 · answer #4 · answered by danashelchan 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My dad and I have always had a really close relationship and I know that it is important to him to give me away especially since I moved out at such a young age and we don't see quite as much of each other as we used to. Your dad sounds like a jerk who wouldn't care about or deserve the honor of giving you to your fiance. I would walk down the aisle alone in your position.
2007-03-23 09:47:21 · answer #5 · answered by orangeflameninja 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't have much of a relationship with my father either. My fiance didn't even call him to get his permission cause to me it doesn't matter. I'm not letting him give me away either. My grandfather is. He has been there for me 100 times more than my father ever has. If I was you, I wouldn't ask him to give me away, you can ask one of your grandfathers, or an uncle, brother, cousin. Whoever your close to. You can even have your mother walk you down the aisle. Don't let him ruin your special day. Good Luck!
2007-03-23 08:57:01 · answer #6 · answered by warriorchic84 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Giving away the bride is a symbol of her parents, who have raised her, nurtured her, and protected her, giving this responsibility to her husband. If your father was never there for you and you have no relationship with him, then he does not need to walk you down the aisle. Ask someone who has been invaluable to you, your mom, a brother, uncle, grandparent, or go it alone.
2007-03-23 10:54:02 · answer #7 · answered by Janice O 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is your right to let anyone give you away. If you do not have that sort of relationship with you father I would choose another person. Besides what he did was wrong making someone wait that long
2007-03-23 08:48:02 · answer #8 · answered by Mike 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your father sounds like a beauty. You don't have to have him or anyone "give you away". I've personally always hated that custom-you're a person-how can you give a person away? I would walk down the aisle on my own, and just tell your father you aren't doing that. end of story.
2007-03-23 09:18:38 · answer #9 · answered by melouofs 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The person who gives you away should be the perosn who has protected, cared for and supported you the most in your life. Your father is not that person - you should pick someone else - a uncle, grandfather, aunt, brother, your mom, sister, best friend - etc. and yes IT CAN be a girl!
2007-03-23 16:42:54 · answer #10 · answered by Chrys 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋