My boyfriend broke up with me but now we are back together and he still wants me to abort our child. He said he wants to be with me regardless and if i do keep the child then he will make my life a living hell.
2007-03-23 06:21:41 · 28 answers · asked by shawty_red_atl 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
DON'T DO IT !!!!!! your unborn baby needs you, It's called murder~~~~~
2007-03-23 06:30:45 · answer #1 · answered by K F 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
the question you need to ask yourself is, do you want this child. And if you do, how will you support the child. Boyfriends may come and go but a child is forever. You can be a single mom and still have a good life. if you give the baby up or abort it, how will it make you feel. Abortion doesnt end when the baby is removed from your body, and you will still have feelings for a child that you give up for adoption. Abortions cause deep emotional scarring that you may not understand until much later in life. everytime you hear a baby cry, or see a mother and child together it will affect you. if you choose abortion please seek couseling, even if you don't need it. If you give up the baby you can know that he or she is going to a good home. your boyfriend is being selfish. he only cares how being a dad makes him feel. you need to figure out how being a mom makes you feel. you may lose your boyfriend, and you may struggle with a child being a single mom, but the benefits are worth it. If he doesn't want a child now, how will he feel if it happens again. if you get an abortion, how many abortions will you have to get to keep him happy. remember this is your body. think of the baby as your baby. i think adoption is your best answer and I would never recommend an abortion after having had one.
An abortion stays with you. you will remember the child you lost, mourn it even. you may have nightmares and someday when you have another child, do you really want them to know you aborted their sibling. If you can take it I would say go for adoption, and either your bf stands by the decision or not. If he doesnt agree then oh well. Its your body and your child and you have the right to dictate it. If you want the baby then raise it, just be prepared to do it alone. He sounds like a jerk so I wouldnt expect child support, and I wouldn't expect him to take responsibility for his actions. he hasn't so far. but never put yourself in this situation again, its not fair to you. he is not the one who has to make the descision you are. he has already demonstrated that he doesn't care enough for you, or he would support you. he would help you through this if he was to step up and be the man he needs to be. but you need to figure out the answer you can life with.
2007-03-23 06:44:29 · answer #2 · answered by lydia manning 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know exactly what to do. I guess you just need someone to verify your decision. So if you need someone keep it real with you, here it is.
Anyone who threatens you, is not on your side. Your man told you he was going to make your life hell. What, you don't believe him? Why does he want to be with you if he feels he'll be so unhappy where he has to make you unhappy? No offense, but it isn't because you're the baddest thing in town. He probably feels like he has some influence over you. I'm guessing he broke up with you after finding out you were pregnant; but what got you two back together if you hadn't changed your mind about having the baby? He clearly hasn't changed his mind so why would you go back to him? He doesn't care about you or the baby and you know it. Your man is trying to force you to choose between him and the baby and you're giving him fuel to think he has that kind of power over you.
If tells you up front that he'll make your life hell if you have the baby, how do you think he'll carry it with the baby once it gets here? He might, at the sight of the baby, warm up and decide to take his responsibility as a father seriously but there's nothing you said for me to assume that about him. He doesn't sound that mature. Where your maturity comes in is whether or not you allow him to dictate your actions. He is not your husband and from the way you describe him, he's not husband material. You are wasting your time with him. If you suffer from low self esteem and self doubt, now is the time to get over it. You have that baby to think about it and I can tell you from experience that if you don't have any self worth, you can teach your child any.
2007-03-23 07:03:19 · answer #3 · answered by Honey 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I haven' t ever had an abortion, but have friends who have. They told me that it is physically, and emotionally painful. I was told by my boyfriend, to abort it, but I refused, the thing is men can't feel what we feel, so they may say some horrible things, also because they are scared. I know my boyfriend fell in love the moment he heard our son's heartbeat at 9 weeks. After that you couldn't have paid him enough to want to abort his child. But I can't tell you what to do, it's all about what's right for you, it's your body, and any decision you make you will have to deal with it the rest of your life. The boyfriend sounds like a loser to me if he will really make your life a living hell, just for not killing a baby. But if you know that he is better than that, give him time, when he see the ultrasound to determine the sex he will fall in love instantly, if not you are on your own. But you can do it, your a woman, one of the strongest creatures God has ever made.
2007-03-23 06:31:03 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
well thats an easy answer. first get rid of the boyfriend if he really loved you he woudl support you no matter what your choice and would never make idle threats or anything of the sort.
As for the abortion. That is a living child with a heart beat... if you don't want the child thats fine but at least consider blessing some unlucky family that is unable to have children with your child. Otherwise if you want to keep your little person, then that is your choice, and your alone to make.
2007-03-23 06:28:25 · answer #5 · answered by K. A 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I guess you have to ask yourself why you don't want to abort. If its because you believe that life begins at conception and abortion is murder, then your bf is asking you commit murder against your unborn child. Is that really a guy that you want to have around you?
He sounds manipulative and cruel. And I think that your life will be a living hell if you stick with him regardless of whether you decide to keep the baby or not.
I think that your best choice is NOT to be with HIM, regardless of baby or no baby.
2007-03-23 06:33:06 · answer #6 · answered by Heather Y 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't believe in abortion. I believe that you also have the option of having the baby and putting it up for adoption. But, this is something that you are going to have to decide for yourself.
I do know one thing for sure. Dump the boyfriend. Anyone who would try to pressure someone into this kind of decision and would even think of making the mother of his child's life hell is a loser.
2007-03-23 06:26:34 · answer #7 · answered by Sharon M 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
If he is asking this of you then he doesn't respect your or love you. He is being manipulative and he is blackmailing you into killing your child.
My advice, get rid of this guy. He is worthless and he is going nowhere. Don't waste your time.
Keep a journal of all the times he threatens to "make your life a living hell" if you keep your child. After the baby is born, get a court ordered paternity test, sue for sole custody of your child and get after him for child support. What an ***.
2007-03-23 06:38:01 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
He doesn't sound like the type of boyfriend you would want to keep around. If you decide to have this baby he will make your life a "living hell", is that what you want your child to be around?
2007-03-23 06:27:25 · answer #9 · answered by krispeds 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Scar tactics? How Wrong!! You really need to do what you want to do. You said you do not want to abort the child....Then don't! You have a responsibility to yourself and to your unborn child. Do not let anyone tell you what to do. Stand up for yourself and for your defenseless child. Get rid of the insensitive ***. You and your child deserve better.
2007-03-23 06:49:06 · answer #10 · answered by SAMMY 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont do it!! if thats not what you want! its up to you and how u feel about it (not him), If you do end up doing it when you dont want to then you will more then likely regret that decision for the rest of your life! now if he threatens you by saying he will make your life hell then i would just leave him! thats very mean to put you in a situation like that!..its basically making you choose between him and your baby!...if you want that baby, keep it! you will do just fine without him and raising the baby on your own!.. Just DO NOT let him make that choice if you dont feel the same way! Do what you feel is best! goodluck <33
2007-03-23 06:29:33 · answer #11 · answered by babygirlz3n2 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋