Well my best mate broke up with her bf a month ago but he has just asked me out and I tried talking to my mate about it but she totally ignored me and said that ' You do what you want' but she looked really upset and the next day she said I was doing this by purpose . I don't know what to do, I am so confused. What do you think I should do??
2007-03-23 05:36:02 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Wow !!! This is one of what I thought was a no-brainier. It's in the pool of questions like, should I use a hammer to swat a fly on my forehead or should I start smoking. You seem to know the answer to your own question. If this guy is the love of your life, I mean you guys were made for each other and you are ready to say goodbye to your friendship over it, well . . . go for it. But you know that's not what we've got here. Do what you already know to do and move on.
If the guy was a good guy he would not even try to date his ex's best mate. How heinous!!!
2007-03-30 20:24:42 · answer #1 · answered by Di'tagapayo 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hooking up with your best friends ex is the smartest idea. In the long run your friendship can become sabotaged . 9 times out of 10 your friend may still have feelings for this guy and they may get back together never know. So, be considerate of your friend and her feelings cause right now I'm going to tell you girlfriend your walking in a danger zone starting with your boundary line has her friend and your about to cross it. You never date you best friend's ex or even much sleep with her ex. That's something you just don't do. Think about it if the roles were reversed would you want her to do the same thing to you. If you really care about your best friend you wouldn't do this. Plus you should no better if this guy asked you out and you knew that he use to go with your friend you should have said no immediately from the start. Your a smart woman. I honestly don't think your concerned about your best friend, you wanted that man while your friend was with him. Your not really much of a friend now are you?
Just keeping it real.
2007-03-31 04:15:52 · answer #2 · answered by diva22 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When someone says: " You do what you want"....it does not mean to do it.
It is a way of saying,
"are you kidding" or
You have got to be joking" etc. etc.
It means no...and " just by you asking means your considering it."
If she is your friend, try not to pick up the leftovers from her life.
Even if they broke up because it was not good for either one of them, she is still going to feel sad about it all.
You have offended her, by not being sympathetic to her loss, and your acting like a vulture, picking at the leftover pieces she left behind.
It would be decent to let her get over it and grieve for a bit. And think she needs a friend in you.
This guy was not a dress or outfit, she grew tired and asked you if you wanted it.
Reverse what you asked of her, by saying you were not thinking at the time. And that she is more important right now. Maybe down the road, once she gets over him, she won't mind if you date him.
So, Don't date your best mate's friend.
She has had her problems with him, and it looks like your telling her, that you can do a better job with him, then she did.
2007-03-23 13:05:09 · answer #3 · answered by sweetcitywoman2002 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
DON'T go out with him! It's one of the most important rules of friendship; never go out with an ex that meant something. If she got upset, it's obviously because she cared (and still cares, probably) about him. It's only been a month. Besides, he asked YOU out, but do you really like him? If he's not an awesome guy, and that you absolutely can't live without him, then don't risk your friendship over it. And go apologize to your friend for even considering it, because you shouldn't.
2007-03-31 10:46:24 · answer #4 · answered by IKO 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sorry honey,
but I have to agree with your friend.
If you do what YOU want,,,
you won't have a friendship or best mate anymore.
I am sorry, but that is just a cardinal rule amongst
best friends, you DON'T go out with their ex's,
and they don't go out with yours.
IT'S JUST THAT SIMPLE.........
IT RUIN'S FRIENDSHIPS!!!!
I am just fare warning you-
if she is truly your best friend,
and she has always been there for you,
you ask yourself, if the roles were reversed,
and it were your ex,,,,
would you like it?
I think not.
Always put yourself in their shoes if you can't figure things
out, you will see things from a completely different perspective.....the RIGHT one.
I did it to some people I called friends,,,
and we are no longer,,,
and I have had friends do it to me,
and we are no longer,,,,
either way,,,,you lose your friends,,
THOSE men were not worth those friendships,
cuz those guys are long gone.....
is it worth THAT man when I am sure
you are able to find YOUR OWN MAN?
Good luck regardless.......
2007-03-30 23:17:11 · answer #5 · answered by trinity3x3 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You know, its not really a good thing to date the ex of your best mate.Its very awkward for your best mate that you were dating his ex.Maybe your best mate is not over with his ex, that's why she reacts that way.Go find another man, if you dint want your friendship to be ruined. Just a piece of advice.
2007-03-31 12:37:28 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't date you best mate ex any way. I mean why would you start to date him any way.She might still have feelings for him .If i was you i would not do cause dating him will call so much confusion . she said do what you wanna do because she is upset so don't do that its the wrong thing to do
2007-03-31 12:24:17 · answer #7 · answered by missnewshawty_08 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If this guy isn't good enough for her to stay with, what makes you think he will be good enough for you. Do you like taking someone Else's leftover's? How can you call her your best friend and still want her ex.? Best friends don't do that to each other. That's a good way to break off your friendship with her. If this was her husband and they were going to break up, would you date him if he asked you to? I'm glad your not me best friend! Good friends are hard to find so think hard about this. He may have asked you out just to get even with your friend for breaking up with him.
2007-03-31 11:19:19 · answer #8 · answered by Tinkerbell 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If u broke off with your ex for some reason,would u try to click with his best buddy one month later?
Play along with that guy and avenge your best mate!!!!
2007-03-31 11:10:28 · answer #9 · answered by Zod i 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What if it was your ex boyfriend and the situation was reversed - how would you take it?
Besides that - if you are living together, it will cause a rift in your relationship. You must decide which relationship is worth the hassle
2007-03-23 12:41:34 · answer #10 · answered by fancyface1 l 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋