Does anyone know a Golf Joke?

Question

If you have any, please share...

Answer 1

A woman went out to play nine holes. It wasn't a very busy day so she had to play alone. After about 45 minutes she came back to the clubhouse crying. The pro asked her what had happened. She told him that she had been stung by a bee. The pro then asked her where at? She told him between the 1st and 2nd hole. The pro then told her that her stance is way too wide.

Answer 2

A young man who was also an avid golfer found himself with a few hours to spare one afternoon. He figured if he hurried and played very fast, he could get in 9 holes before he had to head home.

Just as he was about to tee off an old gentleman shuffled onto the tee and asked if he could accompany the young man as he was golfing alone.

Not being able to say no, he allowed the old gent to join him.

To his surprise the old man played fairly quickly. He didn't hit the ball far, but plodded along consistently and didn't waste much time.

Finally, they reached the 9th fairway and the young man found himself with a tough shot. There was a large pine tree right in front of his ball, directly between his ball and the green.

After several minutes of debating how to hit the shot the old man finally said, "You know, when I was your age I'd hit the ball right over that tree."

With that challenge placed before him, the youngster swung hard, hit the ball up, right smack into the top of the tree trunk and it thudded back on the ground not a foot from where it had originally lay.

The old man offered one more comment, "Of course, when I was your age that pine tree was only 3 feet tall."

Answer 3

Give a man a golf club and he'll golf for a day..
Teach a man to golf and he'll sit in a cart and drink beer all day.

Answer 4

A foursome of men were playing golf on their usual Sunday morning. At he 7th tee, a funeral procession drove by on the road outside the course. One man bowed his head and stood silently waiting for the procession to pass. Afterwards one of his playing partners commented on his gesture. His response was "It's the least I can do. We were married for 40 yrs."

Answer 5

St. Peter and Jesus were playing golf in heaven. Jesus is faced with a shot over water and asks St. Peter, "What should I hit over the water?" St. Peter replies, "A five iron". Jesus asks what Tiger would hit. St. Peter replies, "An eight iron". Jesus pulls out an eight iron an lands it in the water. Of course Jesus can walk on water and he walks out on the lake to play his next shot. Moses comes up in the group behind and asks St. Peter, "Who does that guy walking on the water think he is, Jesus Christ?" St. Peter says, "no, that IS Jesus Christ but he thinks he's Tiger Woods".

Answer 6

A man comes home after a round of golf and his wife asks him how it went:

Husband: "It was the worst round ever. Bill died on the 3rd hole."

Wife: "That must have been horrible!"

Husband: "Yeah, the rest of the day it was hit the ball, drag Bill, hit the ball, drag Bill."

Answer 7

What do you call 100 white folks chasing a black man.

The pga. (Tiger Woods)

Answer 8

charles barkley's swing...(puhleeze get a look at it on video if you can)

Answer 9

colin montgomery

Answer 10

I dont think i have 1.