I need spiritual advice, please!?

Question

I've been a Christian for a little over a year. Previously, I was an atheist. I experienced things that proved to me personally that there had to be SOMETHING higher out there.

I also realize that becoming a Christian does not mean you will not suffer, and that The Bible tells us that we will suffer because Jesus suffered. I understand that suffering in this life is inevitable, but when does the happiness begin? This has been the worst year of my entire life.

I've devoted myself to my relationship with God and prayed for closeness and understanding. I don't feel any comfort. I've been told that God can deliver us from anything, but when does this happen? I don't want to hear that I should "pray about it" or just accept that its part of God's plan. I want some real answers to my real questions!

In the past year: I lost my job, my previous employer blackballed me, I've had my identity stolen, my car was repossessed during the time I was between jobs, my longtime boyfriend and I broke up, and my daughter passed away. I was also accused by my friends and loved ones of playing a part in her death. I was questioned by detectives for 16 hours before I was released. I was also accused of having a drug addiction (which I previously struggled with but gave up YEARS ago) and my family attempted to have me involuntarily committed -- until my drug test came back negative.

Does being a Christian mean that I have to lose everything and everyone that is important to me before I experience the positives?

Answer 1

Go back to being an atheist, you'll have less disappointment in "God"

Answer 2

I'm sorry that you have been through so much this year, especially with the loss of your daughter. Some of these awful things may have been the devil trying to undermine your new faith. Some may have been the result of the life you lived before. (God forgives our sins when we believe in Jesus, but we still can have earthly consequences.) And some may have no reason behind them. We live in a fallen world, and -- as they say -- "stuff" happens.

You ask when the happiness begins. If you mean the emotion you feel when everything is going great in your life, then I can't say. However, you can right now experience the JOY of knowing that Jesus has paid for your sins, that they were forgiven as you believe in him, and, no matter what happens to you in this life, you will spend eternity with him in heaven. I know it's hard to keep the perspective that this earthly life is just a drop in the ocean of our entire infinite existence, but having the assurance that eventually everything will be alright FOREVER affects how we live our lives now.

Think of going to a movie and accidentally sitting in on the last 10 minutes of the previous showing. Now you know how it ends. And knowing that will affect how you view the movie. You know who turns out to be the bad guy, so you won't be fooled by his pretending to be noble. You know the heroine is alive, so you won't be scared or sad when it seems she is killed in a car accident.

This is the "positive" of being a Christian during this life. And, "No", you don't have to lose everything that is important to you to experience it. You already have it. [However, if there are things in your life which are more important to you than God, so that they endanger your relationship with him, he may decide to remove the competition.]

It sounds like you are kind of going it alone. At least, some of your friends and family are not the support you need right now. If you don't have anyone to talk to who listens and accepts you non-judgementally, I urge you to seek out a minister or Christian counselor. You have been through a lot. Any one of these things could trigger a crisis in faith even in someone who has been a lifetime believer.

Answer 3

It's important to understand the difference between happiness and pleasure. Pleasure depends on things. Happiness does not.

Fortunately, we may have happiness even in the absence of pleasure. You do not need a reason to be happy. Happiness is your nature.

What may be the case is that the difficulties and trials which you have had to endure are serving to illuminate how pleasure is not the key to happiness. Happiness comes when we recognize the purpose that we are serving in God's will for mankind.
No doubt, all the anxiety and difficulty which you have gone through has made the world extremely fertile with opportunities to grow. Crisis is often the thing that leads us to our greatest periods of growth.

...as an excersize you might sit, take a few deep breaths, and simply imagine happiness itself...see how close it is...available for you to experience whenever you would step back and simply hold it in mind.
Trust that God Loves you...because you ARE loved by God.

Once you realize that you are already delivered from your suffering(happiness is yours NOW, not conditionally), and once you accept and trust that God loves you, truly, then you will see that your suffering is only an experience...it is not a reflection on who you are. Once you realize that it's not you, then you'll be free of it. The shell of suffering that you identify so closely with now will fall away like a loose garment.

-Rob

Answer 4

Stay in the word. Read your Bible everyday. I know that might seem like a meaningless mantra, but it's going to bring the word of God into your lifestyle. Believe me when I say that it will grow on you. Read aloud when you can.

The Bible says that faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God.

Here, let me introduce you to a few pastors that can be heard on the internet:

http://twft.com/?page=C2000
http://www.drgenescott.org/live_internet_feed.htm

Just listen to them while you are on the internet, or doing certain chores near your computer.

Dr. Scott is the best Bible teacher I've even heard of, and met.

EDIT: It MIGHT mean that you have to lose everything. But for you, that's a part of the trip. You are being tested, trust Him. You have to trust God in order to be a Christian. That's what makes you a Christian in the first place.

You will learn to pick a promise out of the Bible, a promise that God spoke, and trust it no matter what the consequences.

You can e-mail me if you want to talk about anything, okay?

Answer 5

Wow! You really have been through a lot! When you say that you've devoted yourself to your relationship with God do you mean that you look forward to spending time with him each day more than you look forward to anything else in the day? That you talk to him daily and praise him daily, yes, even in the midst of all this tragedy. Do you read your Bible every day and really learn from it? The reason I ask all these questions is that I know first hand that God will do whatever it takes to get our attention if we don't put him first in our lives. If it means losing everything, then we might. If you look in your Bible you will find that you're in good company. Most of God's most beloved followers were put through the ringer. The good news is that if you can keep your faith and your relationship with God all through these trials and if you can keep believing, he will bring you out of this better than you ever imagined. "All things work together for the good of those that love him." "Seek first the kingdom of God and all these things will be added unto you." Words from the Bible and God does not lie. I know it's hard to believe right now but just keep holding on, keep praying, keep asking God for strength, keep reading your Bible. Make God your focal point and I believe things will begin to change. Like I said...I know cause I've been there. God Bless You!!

Answer 6

"Suffering" is not something like this in the Scripture. The suffering that every believer will experience is also the same suffering that Christ experienced - to lose one's life for the sake of the gospel. I hope you follow.

When people starts persecuting you for the sake of the gospel - that's suffering. I suspect that these things happening to you right now are only product of previous mistakes - product of not believing. Now, you said you believed - started experiencing negative things - why have these things connected on your "convertion"? NO. it's not that way. God never plans like this for His TRUE followers.

Happiness starts once you FOLLOW the TRUTH. However, just be glad - the worst things are yet to come for those who refuses the TRUTH.

Remember, anything you do in this life is still your choice. God is - always the last resort. TOO BAD.....

Answer 7

Hey, I am so sorry! That is all so horrible and I can only imagine how confusing that must have been for you right after becoming a Christian. I don't want to preach at you and tell you all the basic things like "wait on the Lord"(although this is true and necessary) , because you seem to realize you need to do that. He does love you, I promise, and these things that are happening to you are not a punishment from Him. God uses evil in our lives to draw us to Him, and while it may not seem worth it right now, I promise that when you are in Heaven with Him, you will realize His love even in this. I will be praying for you! Hold onto Him...the peace and strength will come.

Answer 8

Well, all I can say is to become even closer to God, read the bible, follow his laws and rules, and you might become happier. Go here, www.ucg.org, and you may find some things there interesting. It also explains prophecies and other things. I know that you don't want to hear this, but pray every night, dedicate at least 10 minutes every day to study the bible, and try to look at life with an optimistic look. I hope you will be feeling better soon.

Answer 9

It's difficult to know how to answer you when I don't know you or the specific problems you are having. I do know, from scanning your "best answers", that you are intelligent and that you know a great deal about medicine. From one answer three months ago, you were 33 weeks pregnant and confined to your bed. It appears you have had some real challenges in your life very recently.

I don't really understand why we have to go through pain and suffering, but I think it has to do with soul development. I remember a time 25 years ago when all I did was cry. Looking back on the horrible experiences I've had in my life, when I was finally able to get through them, they gave me a depth of perspective I had never known before. The pain of the difficulties finally left me, and I was able to use my recollection of events to help people going through similar problems. I believe I appreciate life more as a result of the bad times I have had in the past. Please don't give up. Keep going, realizing that better times are ahead. Reach out to others for help, as you are doing, and find other people who have experienced the same difficulties you are now going through. People who give answers that seem "too easy" may mean well, but may not have endured the suffering you are enduring. Keep looking, and you will find people who can understand and help you. When you find these people, look on them as Jesus Christ Himself, who is reaching out to touch you.

Please don't give up. Keep reaching out and praying. Jesus Christ knows exactly what you are going through, and He is with you now. I pray that you will feel his presence.

Addendum. You added details about your life while I was composing this letter. You have been betrayed by many people and have suffered many losses. Your story reminds me of mine about 25 years ago. I won't bore you with the details, but I found new relationships, and everything is wonderful now. It will be for you as well. Being a Christian did not cause these things to happen. There are awful people in the world who do awful things, and you got a boat load of it all at once. Keep on trying. Never give up.

Answer 10

Being a Christian is not about "losing everything" but it IS about GIVING everything. You will have your good times and your bad times and God is with you through all of them. It's more than praying. You should realize that accepting Christ means giving your life to Him and letting Him do with you what He wants with the knowledge that the "world" will do everything to make you give up. Christ will win. You will win. It's not about you, or how much you pray, or how good you are, or anything like that. It's about God and what He would want you to do in your situations. Don't give up on Him... instead accept Him and thank Him for being with you through this. This too shall pass...

I hope everything works out for you soon. It can be very hard to go through all the things you are saying. I can't even believe that is all in one year! I'll be praying for you too. If you would like to vent or ask more (I can tell you about how He pulled through in certain situations in my life), just email me.

Be blessed... He loves you.

Answer 11

Wow, that's horrible. I feel for you dude. My mom died and then a couple months later one of my cats died, and then a couple months after that my kitten got hit by a car. I became an Atheist for a year and a half after that.
I personally don't think of God as a dude in the sky that punishes us or answers our prayers. I definitly feel higher powers, I personally see them as nature forces, but the important thing is I don't think the divine is something that changes things. I think we need to find peace ourselves. But I do strongly believe you can draw strength from the divine to do this.
If you want understanding and to feel one with something, sitting alone on a beach, or in the forest might help you. Doing that has made me feel connected and strong.
We do make our own plans, but we have to go with ourselves and who we are instead of what the world wants of us. I know I'm babbling. If you ever want to talk you can email me.