Am I wrong??

Question

I am changing my life to be more religious. Do you think it is wrong to expect a potentially boyfriend to be going down the same path that I choose for my spirituality or does that seem selfish? I mean in order to be on the same level we have to be going in the same direction right??

I am not saying that he has to change for ME but I guess what I am asking is. When I explain to him my beliefs and he is on a different level is it wrong for me to say if your not going the way I am going I am going with out you

Answer 1

If your spirituality is Christianity, the Bible does say that we are not to be unequally yoked with non-believers. However, ultimately if your spirituality is something other, then you must make that decision for yourself, you have to realize what the rest of your life will be like with one whose entire world view may run contrary to yours most times.

Answer 2

Yes it is wrong to expect it. He will change if he wants to but only if he wants to. You should never change who you are unless it's what you want. Think of it this way. You can't tell a drug addict or an alcoholic to change his ways or else because he/she will not. They will only do it if they do it for themselves. It's not the same thing but it does go along the same lines. It is selfish to expect someone to be who you want them to be. It makes for a very stressful and resentful relationship. You either love the person for who they are or not.

Answer 3

No. You can't expect anyone else to change just because you want to. It is up to him to make that decision. Especially since he isn't your boyfriend at this time.
Even if he was your husband, just because you change your beliefs doesn't mean he needs to as well. People can get along and compromise things when they have different religious beliefs.

Answer 4

You are wrong. You could be going in the same direction but on different levels. For example, I take the high road and you take the low road and I 'll get to Akron before you but when you get there later we can still have a party.

Answer 5

Yes, it would be wrong to expect that. Just because you are together doesn't mean he will change his beliefs because you do. According to the Bible, you shouldn't be "unequally yoked", meaning that if you are Christian, you shouldn't marry (or be with) a non believer. It's okay to hope that he will change, but he may not. It's his choice whether or not he wants to.

Answer 6

You can choose your path, but you can't expect others to join you. You might be better off finding a bf who is already on the path you have chosen, rather than trying to enforce your beliefs on others.

Answer 7

Yeah, I'd say you're wrong. It's unfair to expect someone close to match your spirituality. As long as you both tend to agree, you shouldn't have many problems in your relationship.

Unless you becoming more religious creeps him out much..

Answer 8

Amen to that! It says in the Bible that you should not be unevenly yoked. If you don't belive in the same spiritaul guidelines or expectations, a lot of strife can occur later on in your relationship. I expect my future husband and any men I date to be strong Christians. If you lets say Christian and then you marry a Buddist, your children are going to wonder "Why is daddy not comming to church?" it is going to cause confusion. If you love your boyfreind or spose enough, you definatly want to show them the right path to aid them spiritualy. Like two peices of metal sharpening eachother.
God bless you
God bless America!!!
K.K.

Answer 9

Your boyfriend will have to choose his own path. But you're within your rights to end the relationship if your paths are not sufficiently congruent.

Answer 10

No, I think it is right, I had to give up friends for the same reason. You still love them as God says, but it is not a good idea to stay with them. They can drag you down.