she's a christian, and i know it will upset her family and possibly her. we've been seeing each other only for about three weeks so far, but it looks like this might work out. when do you think is a good time to bring it up?
2007-03-22 18:10:55 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
ive managed to change the subject each time so far...
2007-03-22 18:13:51 · update #1
Dating helps us refine our search for a long term mate. If you want to waste a lot of time in your own life, then lie to the people you are (or want to be) closest to. I bring it up early in a relationship - a prospective mate's religion and spiritual outlook is crucial info for me.
Peace!
2007-03-22 18:14:31 · answer #1 · answered by carole 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Is this a serious question? I've never heard anyone make a statement like that before. Well three weeks is a little too soon to tell if a relationship might work out, especially since you are keeping something from her. Religion is a big deal to many people - it can often be a deal breaker. You need to discuss the issue with her and go from there. The sooner, the better before you get in too deep.
2007-03-22 18:17:40 · answer #2 · answered by Cambrianna S 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Don't change the subject. Don't avoid the questions.
I am an atheist married to a born-again christian. Religion has been discussed at an early stage in our relationship but we do not discuss it any more. Religion is not allowed in our house.
Now - the rest of our lives together are just what we both need. She has a character and a value as a human being, as a companion and partner and religion has NOTHING to do with that.
My advice to you is to be honest with her - NOW. Do not pretend. Do not attend church. Do not be a hypocrite.
If her religion is more important than a quality human relationship, then problems will arise. Her family are less important but, if they are good people, they will accept you for your character and not your rejection of a fairy tale.
Hey - there are millions of girls out there!
2007-03-22 18:25:25 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't cloud the relationship with a negative atmosphere!
Here, email this link to her and request that you have a talk:
http://dilbertblog.typepad.com/the_dilbert_blog/2006/11/atheists_the_ne.html
Also have your reasons ready. Here are a few:
If we are so complicated that a God had to create us, then isn't the creation of a god that much more complicated? I mean come on!!! (Logic 101)
“Question with boldness even the existence of a God; because, if there be one, he must more approve the homage of reason than that of blindfolded fear”
- Thomas Jefferson
People often use the term "Almighty" when describing God. The term almighty means "having unlimited power", yet this “almighty” needs our prayer? That is a gross contradiction. A God that kills first born children may be almighty, but it shows a serious emotional problem if he needs our justification. Something that is not a good description of a god.
2007-03-22 18:21:55 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Next time religion comes up and when the time is right, I suggest that you say "Well, I don't really believe in God." Best way to say it, worked for me.
If she gets upset, explain to her that it's no big deal and shouldn't affect your relationship.
If she's cool, it's cool.
If she's surprised and wonders why, tell her why you don't believe in God.
Make sure she knows you're an atheist, and do not try to change her views.
2007-03-22 18:24:05 · answer #5 · answered by juhsayngul 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just tell her you dont want religion mentioned at all,when the subject comes up,, It seems to be too hard for some christians to come to terms with people who cann't beleive in a supreme being.
2007-03-22 18:18:36 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Hate to say it but yeah, I would. If she's worth it, she'll stay, if she's not well there are plenty of good atheist women out there (take a look at how many intelligent girls are here).
2007-03-22 18:18:00 · answer #7 · answered by adphllps 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sooner than later because if you end up marrying her and then telling her that could turn out badly. If she doesn't accept that you are an atheist I don't think she is worth going out with.
2007-03-22 18:14:26 · answer #8 · answered by Wardog 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Do it now, before it's too late. Her family, if they are Christian, will probably shun and hate you. You won't want to live with that for the rest of your life.
2007-03-22 18:14:02 · answer #9 · answered by Some Dude 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
If she is a true christian, then she absolutly wont, coz it says in the bible that believers should not be married with unbelievers or something like that
2007-03-22 18:18:42 · answer #10 · answered by thenewhorzta 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋