My daughter who lives with her mother wants to wed i week after she turns 18. And I don't know what I can do or say to talk her out of it. Please help
2007-03-22 16:28:47 · 18 answers · asked by JOHN 7 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I would like to commend you as a father for being concerned about your daughters welfare i am sure not many fathers would stand up regarding this.
I am a 20 year old female who got married three months ago. My husband is 31 so we have a big age gap but when i spoke to my parents regarding dating him they told me that they trust my judgment.I have a few questions for you to think about.
Is your daughter in a great relationship?
how long have they been together?
is he a great guy?
It May be hard but she will be an adult and we all make mistakes and we all learn from them you are able to express your feelings and opinions but in the long run she will do what she wants just be by herside.
2007-03-22 16:43:11 · answer #1 · answered by Nicki H 1 · 3⤊ 3⤋
There is probably nothing you can do.... She will be 18 and considered an adult and can make her own choices. I know people keep saying "oh thats too young" when back in the day(1900-1960) people were getting married as early as 15 16. My grandparents married at 18 and 19 and they were one of the most happiest couples alive. They have showed everyone that love does exist. So who are we to say they are not truly in love. I married my dh and I have been together since we were 18 and I still love him more than the first time I saw him. If your daughter is happy let her be happy. How do you expect her to learn if you try to hold her back? Goodluck and I hope you and your daughter work this out.
2007-03-22 17:50:34 · answer #2 · answered by mrs.russell 7 · 1⤊ 3⤋
I got married a month after I turned 18. And me and my husband dated for 2 1/2 years before we got married. Granted he is 6 1/2 years older than me. (we live in the south so this is not uncommon in our small town. Just to let you have a little hinesight about where were from) We started dating when I was 15 and he turned 22 like a week after we started dating. And we knew his family and they had a long talk and that he had to respect me cause I was still very young and to treat me as if I was his own daughter dating an older young man)But my Mom knew that if she didn't let me date him, that I would find a way to sneak around and do it anyway. But anyway, we just celebrated our 5th wedding anniversary last week. If she's in love let her do it, you can't stop her, all you can do it support her, love her, and be there for her, and pray about it. Good Luck I hope this helps!!!
2007-03-22 16:38:53 · answer #3 · answered by Mommyof2boys 3 · 3⤊ 2⤋
not much you can say but sit her down and tell her that you want her to make sure that's really what she wants. She has to make her own mistakes, not saying that it is because i don't know her, but it is her decision to make. i got married the first time when i was 18 right out of high school. i dated the guy for 3 years and found out after 5 and a half years of marriage that he was cheating on me the entire time with 3 other women. we got divorced and i regretted ever getting married so young. but, i have a best friend that got married at 18 and has been happily married for 12 years. so, it just depends on what they really want. although, i think if they are considering going to college they need to wait until after they graduate from college before getting married. good luck
2007-03-22 16:36:42 · answer #4 · answered by mrs garfield 5 · 4⤊ 2⤋
Hi John, I got married when I was 20 and haven't looked back. Some girls just know who Mr. wright is early on in life. I agree that most of them don't and this is probably the case with your daughter. Take her out to dinner one night and treat her as an adult. Ask her why she wants to get married, ask her how she feels about her future hubby, and ask her if she is getting married to move out of the house. Maybe she doesn't want to live with her mom any more. Tell her she can move in with you, explain that you just want her to experience a little bit of life as an adult on her own, to find herself before she dedicates her life to her hubby.
2007-03-22 19:02:43 · answer #5 · answered by curlytop 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Since she is going to be 18 she is considered an adult. If she wants to mess up her life, there isnt anything you can really do about it. Best thing to do is to stand by her and be by her when the relationship goes south.
2007-03-22 16:35:58 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 7⤊ 0⤋
Well she will be legal. Theres nothing you can do to stop her? Sometimes people have to make their own mistakes to learn. I got married at 19 and have been married over two years. Just because shes young does not mean it will not work if shes doing it for the right reasons.
2007-03-22 16:36:06 · answer #7 · answered by J&A 3 · 4⤊ 2⤋
this is one of the times you'll have to sit back and let her make her own mistake- fighting it wont change her mind but may also isolate her from you- if made in to a full blown dramatic mess(18 yr olds are prone too) she will make it a choice between you and him- which will all be to make a stand for her independence-and chose him-then if he lets her down,she wont feel comfortable coming too you. Better just play this one out quietly and deal with the blows as they come.
2007-03-22 16:39:24 · answer #8 · answered by cassiepiehoney 6 · 4⤊ 2⤋
Is it right? That her decision -- once she's 18 there's really not much you can do. She has to make her own decisions. Hopefully this will work out for her. If not, you just need to be there and support her (emotionally) when things start to go wrong.
2007-03-22 17:29:47 · answer #9 · answered by Vicky L 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
i got married when was 18 and now we have a 3 month old son. We couldn't be happier. You can try to advise your daughter but don't push your oppinion on her or she'll want to do it more out of spite for you. Say what you can but ultimately realize it's her decision now! hope it all works out
2007-03-22 16:47:26 · answer #10 · answered by blessed mommy 5 · 3⤊ 3⤋