We've known eachother for about 4 maybe 5 years. Dated but we broke up because his ex had a child. He loves this baby dearly but hates the mother of the child. How would he go along getting full custody or even just a test to see if it is really his. He does not have the money to pay for the paternity test so...what are other ways. He cannot live with out this child and i cannot live without him.
2007-03-22 10:25:30 · 10 answers · asked by Madison 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
So why aren't you with him? Will you only be with him if he is not the father? Or can you not tolerate the idea of him having visitation? I truly don't see what your hang up is? Perhaps you believe that once you have a baby somewhere in the world, you're not allowed to be with anyone else?
The other possibility is he is saying he doesn't want to commit to a relationship until things are settled, in which case he is stringing you along.
2007-03-22 10:43:30 · answer #1 · answered by nursesr4evr 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Without a little more information, this is hard to answer....but I would start with seeing an attorney for a free consultation. If she is openly claiming that the child is his, then he can mostly likely file for visitation or joint custody...is he paying child support or does he see the child at all? The courts will most of the time request paternity tests if there is any question. I would at least speak to an attorney to get a ball park figure on what it would cost and where to start and go from there...at least you know then what you have to save and work towards and if the two of you love each other and work together, God will provide a way!
2007-03-22 17:49:37 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only way to certainly find out the paternity is to take the test and the cost will be well worth it. I'm sure that arrangements could be made. You file a petition with the court to obtain full custody. Now, let me tell you that it won't be easy and can be very expensive. If you can prove that she's not a fit mother and can't take care of the child then you have a shot, but if she takes care of the child and makes sure that all needs are met.. you'll be fighting a loosing battle and any lawyer will just be taking your money. If its' just a matter of him being intolerable to her (the mother).. then he's just out of luck... she'll always be a part of his life even if just involving the child. I wish you the best of luck. I know what I am talking about.
2007-03-22 17:49:31 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, if he is not on the birth certificate then a paternity test would be needed, no question. He needs to figure out a way to pay for it. Secondly, most child support courts don't automatically refute custody. He would have to hire an attorney for custody rights. And the only way to get full custody is if the mother were to be preoven unfit. Or went to jail for something horrible. Hope things go okay.
2007-03-22 18:29:08 · answer #4 · answered by spicy_salsa69 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It matters what state youy are in. There are many different factors. The main thing is established place where the kid lives. Once you live in a state for 6 months, that becomes the legal residence, where court for legal custody has to be held. When a child is born, at birth or two weeks later a paternity paper is signed saying that the mother acknowledges that this man is the father and the father signs it. it would say it on the birth certificate. Now lets pretend he wasnt around for birth. In Alaska, you can go to a lawyer or represent yourself. Not having a significant amount amount of money would prevent him from getting a attorney. There are classes that you can take that will teach you how to create legal documents to the court and will teach you the proces that you will have to proced, how to present evidence, ect. Hopw it helps
2007-03-22 18:18:23 · answer #5 · answered by Rebecca P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Without a paternity test you are basically out of luck unless perhaps he can get his hands on a copy of the birth certificate and see if he is listed as the father. Unfortunately that is not official evidence because a mother can list anyone on the birth certficate. Concerning custody it is unfortunate but mothers almost always win against fathers. I agree it is unfair but the law is what it is. He will have to take her to court which will cost a ton of money and have to prove he is the better parent. All things being equal, she will likely win. Disliking the other parent unless there is evidence of drugs or sexual abuse will not do the trick.
2007-03-22 18:41:18 · answer #6 · answered by Tina L 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He will need to file for full custody with the courts which could be very difficult if he is not even sure if its his. He will also need a lawyer and to possibly pay for a paternity test if he wants to be successful.
2007-03-22 17:47:25 · answer #7 · answered by fly guy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first of all commend the guy for stepping up to take care of his child not too many guys now a day that would do that 2nd talk to him and let him know that he can still be a good father w/out being with the mother
2007-03-22 17:41:13 · answer #8 · answered by sentrysharpshooter 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
call your family doctor - they may have a way to process a need for the test to be done. in order to get full custody, he would have to prove that it is his. try calling the child support department in your area - i am sure they have methods to assist in this.
2007-03-22 18:33:28 · answer #9 · answered by litlbigdg 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If the mother is unstable meaning unable to care for it then he gets custody or you can try court.
2007-03-22 18:12:45 · answer #10 · answered by courtney m 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋