Ethical question: Where should your loyalties rest... what would you do?

Question

Let's say, hypothetically speaking, that your parent, child, spouse, or significant other confided in you with a confession to killing another person but insist they did so out of self-defense.

At this point, they are not a suspect, and probably won't be. Aside from you, no one knows.

If you report them, you will certainly protect yourself, but there's a good chance they will be convicted of murder and sent to prison.

Would you keep their secret? Do they have a right to expect that you will protect them unconditionally? Or do you have a greater responsibility to society... and to the family of the slain?

Answer 1

I would keep their secret. Yes, I know it's wrong. But when I love, I love unconditionally.

Answer 2

Murder is taboo in almost every society-even those existing without written laws. The human conscience recognizes that murder is wrong. Even though you love them, the only moral and right thing to do would be to turn them in. If it was a true case of self defense, it should be able to be proven. Obviously, they told because the burden was too heavy for them. They did not do you any favors by telling you, but added to your stress. Love shouldn't ignore everything-especially when it breaks laws and morals.

Answer 3

I believe that the question of what is moral is of greater importance in this scenario than what is ethical.

If you are a person who has 'talked the talk' and 'walked the walk' of right and justice for all, not just when it is convenient or when it will not have dire consequences for you ar a loved one, then the answer is quite apparent. Not necessarily simple or easy.

We all must be held accountable for our actions good and bad. After all, the victims family has the right to have closure and receive justice.

Because we love, because we are related or because it will affect me personally; is no excuse or justification for harboring or hiding the truth. No, they do not have the right to expect that they will be protected unconditionally.

Our loyalties should be with our loved one and because of that we should help provide them with a very good attorney and counseling to help them with their mental and emotional anguish that should be the inevitable result of such an act.

Above all, continue to love them and forgive them as God has forgiven us our many sins. However, God does not provide a means of escape from the repercussions of our decisions and mistakes or crimes.

Answer 4

You have a responsibility to society to encourage your loved one to confront the consequences of their actions and turn themselves in. If they are truly innocent as a result of ”self defense” then they will be found innocent. Furthermore, this person is obviously dishonest. Do you really want to associate with someone like that? What else are they hiding from you?

Answer 5

If it's self-defense (and I would be inclined to believe them), then I would back them 100% and keep the secret. There's not a thing wrong about it, IMO, as the act was completely justified.

Answer 6

I'd tell the police immediately. It is for a jury to decide if it was self defense or not. I would not want to be taken in as an accessory after the fact.

Answer 7

I would advise them to turn themselves in, the Judge will have a little mercy on them than if I turn them in. Besides if it is self-defense he/she may not get convicted. I cannot live a lie.

Answer 8

Even if you report them, if the police can't find evidence to convict him, they can't arrest him or try him in court. Then you would have spoiled your relationship with them. Not too good for you. However, if they are a serial killer, it's best to report them.

Answer 9

Right or wrong, my loyalty would be with my parent or child. Not sure about my spouse - we are divorced.