I clicked with a coworker doing a business trip and we became close friends.He told me he had a girlfriend and that they just bought a house together but he wasnt happy and wanted out of their relationship.
Then he told me that he broke up with her but because of the financial situation, they were still living in the house (in seperate bedrooms) until they could sell the house.
We hooked up soon after and started a serious relationship. We were together for about 4 months and it was very special but alot of stress was involved because of his living situation.Basically alot of drama was involved and we ended up ending it and he said that as soon as he moved out he wanted to be with me.
Now I found out very recently that he's with his girlfriend again and I can't help but to feel betrayed.Now I don't even know if he was lying to me during our entire relationship and I don't want to know.
His girlfriend knows nothing about me. Since he lied and screwed me over, should I tell her????
2007-03-22 08:49:54 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
ALSO-he's the one who told me he was back with her and swore on his dead father's grave that he had been honest with me during the relationship.
But regardless, shouldn't she know?? She's 10 years older than me, divorced, and has a child from her past marriage.
I have love letters, emails, and Christmas cards he wrote me telling me how he's desperately in love with me and can't live without me. So I have proof if she would need it.
Doesnt she deserve to know so she can start a stable relationship and family???
2007-03-22 09:01:08 · update #1
ONE MORE THING-
I am over him so I dont appriciate people telling me how stupid I was for falling for him. I don't want him and have learned from MY mistake.
My question is does his 33 year old girlfriend with a child deserve to know...so please stick to answering that.
2007-03-22 09:11:49 · update #2
YES! I definitely think you should try to get some clarity...You deserve to know, she deserves to know, and that punk deserves to be kicked in the balls...
2007-03-22 08:55:02 · answer #1 · answered by emeia04 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hi
Back in the day I dealt with the same issues . Trust me when I say that your special guy never left the woman he was with . See this is the crap that they tell you that they are so unhappy , tired of their sh$t but still they are there .
At the same time loading you up with promises of romance and a future together . There is never a future when the guy / gal already has someone else .
Learn from your mistakes and move on I did . Never do that again to yourself because you deserve better than a part -time lover .
2007-03-22 16:08:28 · answer #2 · answered by Constance M 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOW!! That is complicated. Of course he was lying and if he wasn't why in the world would you establish a relationship with a man who purchased a house with a woman. He's just one step away from marriage. Come to think of it he could be engaged to her. I don't want to sound rude but you should've known better and if you didn't now you do. Guys are jerks in my opinion. I learned at a young age and I'm only 26 now. So now that you know just be more careful. Be glad that you had this experience because now you can learn and grow from it. Think about this: If you tell her she might just laugh in your face and say that you just want her man. It could also make their relationship stronger. Or yeah she could break up with him. But it seems to me that anytime you buy a house with someone it's serious and not a relationship that can be easily severed however she does deserve to know the truth before she marries this lying man.
Be strong
2007-03-22 16:04:54 · answer #3 · answered by Heaven26 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No don't even bother to tell her, let her deal with the same drama over and over. Just learn from experience and it just sounds like he played you. I feel like that what a guy did to me, we were together for a year and he wanted to move so bad. (he was renting a room when i met him) We moved together after 12 months and he did absolutely nothing. He was just looking for a free ride. (i made more than him but at the time it didn't matter cause i was in love) But now I see and I will never make that mistake twice. Just ignore him because he will get what's coming to him for treating the both of you like that.
2007-03-22 16:00:37 · answer #4 · answered by misscancer10 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's hard to say. It really depends on if he was telling the truth about their relationship or not. If they were truly separated when you and jerk-face were together, then technically you have no business telling her.
However, I get the feeling that he was lying to you. If he was lying about his relationship with his girlfriend, then she absolutely has a right to know. She'll be hurt and angry (even with you), but you may spare her heartache in the future.
I guess I would tell her either way, but you're definitely going to make more enemies than friends doing so. And if you still work with this guy, things are going to get very complicated and awkward.
2007-03-22 15:56:41 · answer #5 · answered by Miranda 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First off, you should have never involved yourself in a relationship with him until he got this living arrangement with his girlfriend settled no matter what excuses he gave you. You should have told him, "ok, I understand, call me once you are first finished with the issues you are having with your girlfriend". This way you would not have taken a chance on him lieing to you which he probably did or he would not have still been with her. Be glad you found out or for it is obvious he is a guy who cannot be trusted to be loyal.
2007-03-22 15:56:55 · answer #6 · answered by pictureshygirl 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
NO, you should not be the one to tell her. No matter what she's going to hate you for it. There's a chance that he was broken up with her during the time that you two dated and unless you know for sure that he actually cheated on her with you i wouldn't be the one to spill that.
If i was you i'd have a little chat with the guy. Find out wtf happened and why he's back with the ex. Then decide if you wanna destroy his life lol. Odds are he's just a guy that went back to his ex cuz it was stability and it had nothing to do with you.
2007-03-22 15:56:28 · answer #7 · answered by Dawnwalker 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you fell prey to a booty call! you knew he had a woman all the time. you knew he was going home to her. he just wanted to **** you. you let him. now he doesn't want you any more so you are brittle. shame on you for letting him do it but it's just that-- you let him do it! leave it alone and go on with your life. there will be others like you down the road. just grin and bear it. what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. once bitten, twice shy. he'll get his later on. as long as he didn't infect you with anything, let him go completely because right now, he's still all in your system. move on with your life and don't fall for the banana in the tailpipe so to speak!
2007-03-22 15:58:52 · answer #8 · answered by d. w 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, it's not the girlfriends fault, but it does sound like he lied to you. He never broke up with his girlfriend. Is he still a coworker? I would confront him and let him know what you know. Let him talk himself out of that one! Good Luck!
2007-03-22 15:55:15 · answer #9 · answered by treasureyourself 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She is dating an asshole. Most likely she knows it and wouldn't break up with him, even if she knew. I would write her a letter and let her decide for herself. If she is a sane person, and truly didn't know, you are doing her a huge favor.
2007-03-22 15:57:08 · answer #10 · answered by MT Hammer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋