my mom is all ready plaining me to live with her?

Question

I'm 16 and i love me mom but she talking about me living with her.. shes a single mom(father past away) and I'm the youngest and my bro and sis don't really talk to her much. i know it must be a scary thing to think about being alone, but is it wrong for me to want to live alone when i get older, of course i would visit my mom but i don't think i would last long in the same house, i told her we could be neighbors but that's not good enough.. what should i say..

Answer 1

Ya gotta understand that it is your choice. Its good to see it that she understands this. When you turn 18, its legal for you to move out.

Answer 2

No house should have 2 women in it, she'll always and forever have the physcological edge over you, playing the 'parent' card. You'll always be the 'daughter', you'll never fully realise who you are if you don't get out on your own someday. Don't worry 16 is young, just have a personal 3 or 4 year plan, to move out but do not ever tell her your plan- she will sabotage it. She is only using your for company but she is not thinking what is best for you. We don't give birth to people so we'll have friends, so we'll 'never be lonely'. We give birth to individuals, who have their own lives to live, and beware of the 'guilt' role she'll hand you. You can love anybody, from a distance. When you really love another person you set them free, we give our children roots, and then wings.

Answer 3

I wouldn't go overboard worrying TOO much about it yet. It may be best since the two of you don't see eye to eye, to put off that conversation until you've decided where you're going. College, an apartment, to stay with her and go to a local college.

You're only 16 so what you decide now, may not be the same way you feel when you're 19. So don't discuss it too much with her about it now. You'll jut end up having more arguments/discussions when you'll have to do it all over again after you make up your mind on what you're doing.

When the time comes, you'll have to sit down with her and let her know that you love her, she'll always be your mom, you can still be close even if you want to start your own adult life Every daughter or son has their own life, moves away, goes to college, gets married, has kids, but nothing can break a parent/child bond as long as you don't let it be broken. She'll have empty nest syndrome, i'm sure. But she can't expect you to stay with her forever. Deep down she knows this, but doesn't want to admit it yet. That's why it's better not to discuss it until you're 100% sure of what you're doing with your life.

I have 4 kids and can tell you, they're only 7, 3, 2, and 1. And i'm already getting sad thinking about how when you have children, you're guarenteed to end up with a broken heart. You're every day one day closer to them leaving and starting their own family with their own kids. But I know that's the way it works, and all I can do is raise them well, make sure you're a tight knit family, so we'll always spend time together, I can babysit their kids, I want to make it where they're not running from me, but towards a future that i'll be a big part of. Maybe you can say that to her, you're not leaving her, you're starting a life that she will be in.

But don't make definite plans now, you've got time. You'll save both of you from tension and stress and possibly fighting since she doesn't want to let you go yet. And be happy you have a caring, loving mom! She'll realize eventually she can't keep you with her forever, but she'll adjust.

Answer 4

youve just got to explain to her that while you love her alot, you will need your own little corner of the world.Tell her you will be sure to come visit often and call and see how shes doing.She may not except it right now, but when the time comes youve just got to go.When she sees you arent throwing her away simply because you dont live with her she will come around.You can set aside one day to just do something with her or maybe ask her to help you decorate your new place, that will make her feel like shes still taking part in your life.