Should I find another psychiatrist?

Question

Hi, I know I can never have a romanitc relationship with my doctor due to the doctor-patient rule of ethics but how can I continue on with my treatment. He is helping me to deal with my issues but I've fallen for him. I'm thinking maybe it's because he listens to my most intimate thoughts. I tell myself everyday not to think that way about him but I can't stop. I also know that this is not good for my therapy. Should I find another doctor even though we are just now starting to make some progress? Also should I tell him about my feelings and end my therapy with him or give him some lame excuse for not seeing him anymore and find another therapist?

Answer 1

I think you should be honest with him
That's all you can do
And ask for his advice on what to do afterwards, if you decide to end the therapy with him, at least he will be able to help you find another therapist just as good

Answer 2

If you’re a teen, remember that the teen years are the absolute worst time of your life. I'm surprised any of us survive it. You are struggling with so much stress, pressures, changes... Your body and mind are trying to cope but ... it's hard. The brain is a very complicated and delicate thing. It can get messed up and be unable to produce any or enough serotonin. This is called a chemical imbalance which is easily treated, very common and nothing to be ashamed of. It can cause depression, anxiety, panic, obsession, self harm/self hatred, suicidal thoughts, eating disorders, sleeping problems, aggression/rage, anger, phobias, fears, helplessness/hopelessness, hypochondria, ADHD, paranoia, OCD, headaches, lack of interest in things, lack of motivation/ focus and much more. Go to a dr. and ask for anti-depressants. Zoloft/Sertraline is a good one; most people thrive on it and it has no side effects. With antidepressants, you will be much better, happier, calmer, confident, safer and feel normal. What a difference it makes! Therapists are mostly a waste of time and money. They aren’t even allowed to prescribe appropriate meds to help you get better. Don’t stop taking the meds once you start to feel better. You need them, so stay on them. But meds can do only so much. God is the ONLY one who knows what you’re thinking, how you’ve struggled and what you’re going thru. He loves you passionately and wants to be your BFF. He has a super-deluxe custom-made plan for your life that’s beyond anything you ever dreamed of. BUT He waits for us to ask. Invite Him into your heart; ask Him to take over your life and your problems. Find a big, happy church, attend some groups and have fun. Talk with the pastor or youth pastor; he probably deals with this a lot and will have some good ideas. God loves you more than you can possibly imagine!! :)

Answer 3

Yes you should... If you can't make sense of it and rationalize it and understand that nothing will or should happen....other than a client patient relationship... Then you should consider moving on.

Apparently it happens to everyone eventually because it is natural to develop emotions and feelings for someone you see as a caregiver. This kind of situation is usually how the physician gages weather or not it is time for you to move on because it is all a part of a process and you SHOULD move on if you can't make sense of, to rationalize, or filter through your emotions. and see thins from a place of acceptance that nothing will happen... even if it were to happen... It is a form of abuse...

By doing so, you will realize that human beings can develop affectionate feeling toward anyone who nurtures and cares for them... But that doesn't always have to become a romantic tie. You don't have to sleep with someone or even be romantic with them, or know them very much at all... to forfill a need of one another.

You pay me... I help you. The buck stops there!

Even if you do move on and no one else ever does it for you like this current doctor... They cannot ethically reciprocate. To do so would mean that you would cause them to have to forfeit their license. Would you really do that to someone you profess to care for?

If your doctor sees you the same... You should stop seeing them anyway because it is unethical for them to attempt to reciprocate any show of affection.

You have got to see things in perspective and realize that just because you respect someone and like them and they make you feel good about yourself... They are doing it, because you HIRED them to do it.

Relationships are mutual. The doctor can't reciprocate and you should honestly consider starting on someone else if you are having these feelings and you can't properly filter them.

But the first rule of getting better mentally and emotionally is honesty.

Talk to your doctor about it objectively.. Realize that you are human... and know that this is rather common so you are not a freak. and give the doctor a chance to decide what is the best course of action. I know that it is embarassing and awkward. But like I said... Honesty with yourself and with others is always the first step toward actually showing that you are making an effort toward getting better.

Answer 4

My initial thought is to keep your Doctor, but don't tell him how you feel.

I'm a young attractive guy whose been in therapy and I've had a few very attractive and caring female Dr's who have made me FEEL similar to what you described.

What you need to understand is that your feelings are predicated on a non-judgemental situation. A doctor is paid to listen to their patients and offer them resolve in helping them improve their quality of life. They do not judge your behaviors based on their own moral principals.

Now, if you meet someone socially and they get to know you and accept you for who you are without judging your faults, naturally, you are going to feel some attraction towards them them. Why? Because when you care about someone, regardless of their faults, it shows that you are a selfless, caring and accepting. Those are qualities that we all look for when we get invovled with someone romantically.

Do you see the difference in what it's like to be selfless vs. being professional?

I think it's great that you're making progress and that you feel positively towards your Doctor. Continue to see your Doctor as long as you are feeling better about yourself. But if you're only feeling better because you are attracted to them and not concentrating on the therapy, the FEELINGS of euphoria are taking over andprevent you from focusing on your real problems.

We all want to meet someone that makes us feel special, but that's not what your Doctor is for. Use your positive feelings towards your Doctor to create an honest and open relationship in dealing with the issues you are facing.

If you tell your Doctor that you are attracted to them, they may or may not continue to see you. I advise that you put your romantic feelings aside and concentrate on yourself.

Hope this helps.

Answer 5

Have you acted on this or is this just a crush? If you just feel that way, moving to another doctor may not help because you end up doing the same over and over again. What you need to do is take a step back and realize that he/she is trying to help you. Don't wreck thier medical practice and act on your passions because you are not just hurting yourself but any one else they may help.

Answer 6

Yes, tell him why you are terminating treatment and have him get you another doctor. Your therapy will not be as effective around someone you have romantic feelings with.

Answer 7

This is a very common occurance. It is likely your doctor has dealt with similar situations before, or at least been trained to deal with situations like this. I would encourage you to discuss your feelings with your doctor and he can refer you to someone else. Maybe working with a female psychiatrist would better benefit you in the long run.
It is not in your best interest to continue this client/doctor relationship as it sounds like it is already hindering you.

Answer 8

Find another therapist and ask him to transfer your records. You do not owe him an explanation and he probably senses you ardor and will do as you wish and be relieved because of professional ethics.

Answer 9

It wouldn't hurt to tell him and see what he thinks. A romantic attachment is not uncommon and may not necessarily impede your progress. Tell him and ask if he thinks you should go elsewhere, even if it's embarrasing. Tell him if you're embarrased, too. His training should have covered that well.

Answer 10

Yes, you need to find another psychiatrist.
This time, get a female one.