As the eldest one of the family...even after my marriage...helped all my youngest brothers and sisters.....helped them for higher studies ..their marriages...the welfare of their children....failed to take care of my family....Now when I need their help for the sake of my family..all r not responding ..not even cared to visit me..The mistake I done is that I spent most of my husband's money for my brother's and sister's.welfare..than my family....So now nobody is there to take care about my family...Now I'm 60 years...only my husband -retd.engineer is with me..we live on the pension...not depending on anybody.....
2007-03-22 04:48:48 · 10 answers · asked by Lalithambika S 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
according to a sanskrit shloka,the tree which is easily cut is the tree which stands straiht and is plain without any curves.you are that tree.you have always tried your level best to help everyone but all them are highly materialistic.don't worry have faith in god.you fulfilled your duty towards everyone.now he will fulfill his duty towards you.
"BHAGWAN KE GHAR MAIN DER HAI;ANDHER NAHI"
2007-03-22 05:05:53 · answer #1 · answered by NAZREEN 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"Oh how soon we forget" is the kind of attitude it seems that your friends and family have for you. But you don't stop there. God will take care of you and bless you. He never forgets, he sees every sincere gift.
Why do people do this? Because they don't want anyone to remember when they were dirty, hungry, poor, unhealthy. They want to have amnesia and hope that you will have amnesia with them.
What to do, what to do, what to do...
Seriously what I would do, is get on the phone if I needed help. If I needed to go to the store I would call up my brother or sister. "Hey, can you take me to the store? Or can you go to the store for me" Let them tell me that don't have time... I'd read them like a book.
Oh, you don't have time? Let's see when you were sick did I not make time to care for you? When you needed money for school did I not take care of you?
Then I would end the conversation like this. Well, I hope you never need a single crumb while you are alive on this Earth. And you just wait. Hopefully they will come around and call you to at least check up on you. As soon as they stop seeing you at the holidays because you are too busy with the new friends, true friends that you will meet, your family and old friends will wonder what happened. And they will realize their own selfishness.
I wish you well.
2007-03-22 05:06:39 · answer #2 · answered by Nique T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is really a sad thing to happen. You'd want to doubt the saying, "it is better to give than to receive", is really worth it.
You know what, I fear that this may happen to my parents when they grow old. My Dad (an engineer too) works and earns really good money. Most of my Mom's relatives (and friends) come to us for help a lot. She's very helpful, generous and could be a ****** like that. Those people she helped sometimes take advantage of her too. Already, her sister and that sister's daughter who used to live in our house (ate OUR food, used MY car, borrowed OUR parents' money, slept in OUR room) who became slightly better off after living in our house (for like a couple of months) do not even call her anymore; and worse, bad mouth her to our other relatives. They are such ingrates!
I guess you can't force people to be more thankful to you, or make them feel like they owe you something in the favor bank. It's just something that they are, or are not. If they treat people who help them that way, then the comforts they enjoy will be short-lived. Just be content in the feeling that you have extended a hand to them and that somewhere, help will come to you when you least expect it. That is how being a selfless giver works.
Anyway, my Mommy believes that everytime she helps others, God will repay her a hundredfold. I am a religious person and I adhere to the law of karma, but I think that giving too much could be self-detrimental at a certain extent. I adviced my Mom to keep some to themselves too, because I'd like them to grow old enjoying the fruits of their labour. Good thing my Dad also keeps some of his earnings in another account so they could save for their retirement. In your case, you still have pension fund to finance you so you will not go hungry. If it is moral support/companionsip you are looking for, turn to friends who are there to love you as well. Try meeting new people at the church, or a common interest group that will (hopefully) not mooch off you.
Smile, God loves you and will not let you down. Pray. =)
2007-03-22 06:18:52 · answer #3 · answered by Tammy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Regretfully, that is the way things often work out. I guess the best advice I can give you is be glad that you were able to do what you did through the years to help out your family and if they are not willing to help you out now, then shame on them. You will make it without them, you sound like a strong person.,
2007-03-22 04:56:37 · answer #4 · answered by don n 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
certainly, I actually have a similar venture with my sister and her little ones, although I even have come to the thought this is not the babies to blame as much as this is the mothers and fathers fault. For us, my sister merely does not maximum magnificent undesirable behaviour and it has gotten to the element that the babies do not understand something yet undesirable habit. We had a bbq final year with swimming and the full bit, her 3 boys fought one yet another the full time, broke the pool pump (value me 500 money to interchange) and went directly to thieve issues from my daughters room, terrorize my cat and at supper work together in a nutrition combat. After that them being at my homestead has been minimum and the homestead regulations have been defined so as that they understand in the event that they harm a single rule they're sent homestead. This works nicely while the babies are with out their mom yet enter her into the equation and that they are back to being monsters, so as that they are actually now not invited to applications at my homestead or perhaps though it could sound rude my applications bypass plenty smoother now and we as a kinfolk can certainly delight in them. So my suggestion, even although they're kinfolk they teach finished loss of appreciate for you and your place so until that adjustments do not invite them. in step with hazard being discluded will replace them yet do not save your arms crossed because of fact it hasn't replaced something for my sister and her little ones and that i don't sense undesirable approximately keeping my homestead and my issues, and neither must you. reliable success.
2016-11-27 22:16:02 · answer #5 · answered by shawn 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm interesting. It sounds like this family unfortuntately are very selfish. I wouldn't keep in contact with them and if they do get ahold of you keep them at arm's length. Don't offer anything and if they ask for something; let them know you and your spouse are not in any kind of condition to continue any "help" whatever that may be. It's a shame they've turend their backs on you, but remember what comes around goes around.
2007-03-22 04:56:53 · answer #6 · answered by suzlaa1971 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is there anyway you can take your bro and sis to court and sue?
Not a very careing or loveing family it sounds to me. never there for you, but you were for them.
Try court and sueing them! What would it hurt? They don't give a crap about you, so why not try and get the help back from the purse strings!!
2007-03-22 04:55:23 · answer #7 · answered by peggin_beast 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Think positive and you will certainly get the positive response from your brothers and sisters. Try to see from their perspective to realise their problem in seeing you.
2007-03-22 05:36:11 · answer #8 · answered by ars32 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The worst people to lend money to is family.. Hope it gets better...
2007-03-22 05:21:53 · answer #9 · answered by Its me!!! :) 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should accept your mistakesn express in front of them
2007-03-22 05:03:12 · answer #10 · answered by shihari b 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋