I know someone who's parents always seem to offer the "you can come home anytime" thing. Problem is their children are in their 30's, married, and have their own lives. Everytime something happens where it's rough awhile, they always say the option is to come and live at home for awhile. They always suggest things that don't help the situation...ie: Can't find a job, can't afford to go to school - yet they're saying go back to school?! Comparing this with families who don't ever do this - their kids are normal and don't have the problems the coddlers have. Don't parents see that it is detrimental to their adult children when they keep giving them a fall back? There will be a day when they're not there anymore, isn't better to prepare them for that? Do you find the majority today are coddlers to their adult children? My parents aren't coddlers, however, I know if I need their advice and ask them, they'll tell me what they think - but only if I ask them.
2007-03-22 04:20:20 · 3 answers · asked by daff73 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I think it's nice of the parents to have open doors for their kids.
My parents still do this for my sisters and me. It's been used twice. Once by one sister when she got divorced and had nowhere to go with her three children because she was a stay-at home mom, she and the kids stayed at my mom's place for about two months. Secondly, in September of 2001, my sister and her husband who lived in Las Vegas both got laid off because people stopped gambling. They both came to live with my parents for a few months while they got new jobs, during which time my dad had a stroke, and they stayed until my dad had recovered enough to be independent. I wouldn't call either of those events "coddling."
And about "saying go back to school!?!" keep in mind that no one can actually afford school (unless their employer pays it). Everyone goes in debt when they go to school. Question is how do you pay it back, with a good job or a menial job.
I think the key to your issue is not the parents but the kids. Parents should always love their kids unconditionally and give them what they need if it's within their means. When the adult children come home when they didn't really have to, that's when there's issues, but it's the child that has issues, not the parent.
2007-03-22 04:57:17 · answer #1 · answered by calliope320 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Parents are just being parents to their children. No matter how old you may become your parents are still going to embrace you with the best offers if you are in good or bad situations. Do not penalize parents b/c they love their children. It's the family love. Do you get it now?
2007-03-22 11:25:10 · answer #2 · answered by Christina 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
are you a parent yourself? guess not... you'll understand this feeling when you're a parent. you cannot compare your ideals to the way they love us- unconditional.
parents do this because we're a part of them literally--- respect their feelings and you will never face any difficulty in life. it's true, try it. they are all about love, can't you see--- and then you complain that no one loves you.
there you go an endless treasure of love and care. take care of it.
god bless all the parents around the world
2007-03-22 11:29:36 · answer #3 · answered by sana 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋