I have been with my bf for 2.5months(i am21,hes24)I am his first GF in 2YRS.I could tell he REALLY liked me in the beginning.he took me to meet his parents and friends and invited me EVERWHERE.About a month ago,he started acting really distant and i started to not see him as much(like 1 time a week).Last weekend,he really opened up to me and told me how his ex cheated on him and how he wants to get his life together,then he goes out drinking all the time.I had a talk withhim on Monday about how I feel like he doesnt care about me now,and how i would like to see him more.he was understanding at first,but then said he wanted space,that hes scared and thinks we are moving too fast!also said that he does really care about me and he isnt going anywhere.He told me he would think about this and call me back.i havent talked to him since,and havent tried calling.I want to give him time to think about this,BUT how much more time should I give him?and why is he acting like this?
2007-03-22 04:20:09 · 12 answers · asked by sallyh 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
and if he cares so much why isnt he calling me???How long should i wait before i call him??
2007-03-22 04:27:01 · update #1
ANN S your an idiot.Ur some old cow who sit on the computer reading other ppls problems. I have a situation that i need help with, and new things are happening everyday,so i need new advice. GET A LIFE!!!
2007-03-22 06:08:03 · update #2
It sounds like he does like you, but he doesn't want to be in a relationship right now. I know that's hard to hear. I would give him until the middle of next week and then call him. Tell him to be honest and let you know if he doesn't want to be in a relationship with you. You need to know now. Why prolong your agony? Best of luck to you.
2007-03-22 04:26:00 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't take it personally. A lot of us go through a phase like this at some point in our lives. It's better he's doing this now than to do it 2.5 years from now. He's being honest and up front by telling you he needs his space. To hang out with friends and do "guy" things. He doesn't want the responsibility of having a serious relationship, at the moment, and that's fine. I know it hurts but you're going about it the right way by stepping aside and not having any contact. The last thing you want to do is appear pushy or whiney. That will really distance him from you.
You should move on too. Cry your heart out if you want, then pull yourself together and carry-on. Go out with your girlfriends and have a good time. Chances are someone else is going to come into your life but the only way you're going to meet him is to be out and about. Don't sit around feeling sad. You're young, your heart will mend, honestly.
I can just about guarantee you your paths will cross again. Maybe as a friends, maybe as boyfriend/girlfriend. Time will tell. In the meantime, enjoy your life, smile and be happy.
2007-03-22 12:09:11 · answer #2 · answered by princessnana143 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you're overreacting. Being cheated on is a very traumatizing thing for someone in a relationship. I know I've been cheated on, and I've cheated as well. The victim is scarred for life; I know I haven't been able to carry out a relationship without fearing that my girlfriend could possibly leave me for someone else.
This guy OBVIOUSLY is struggling to overcome his fear of being cheated on again. And you should give him all the time and space he needs, if you really care about him. Cuz when he's decided that he has recovered, you WILL see a change and you'll get to be with him more frequently.
Just wait it out right now; there's no reason to suspect that anything awkward is going on.
2007-03-22 11:27:10 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm in a similar situation right now...except we still speak. If I were you I would call him and ask him how he's doing. Don't bring up any of your issues...just ask him how he's been . When he asks you how you've been don't mention that you've been thinking about all that stuff. Maybe say that you've missed him a little. Guys are so complicated and annoying. He could also just be stringing you along. If he's an actor think twice about if you want to be with him. We have to remember that if that guy doesn't want to be with us, we will damn sure find someone who worships the ground we walk on and if it's not them then it's better for us.
2007-03-22 11:28:44 · answer #4 · answered by ForestGirl20 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
After reading your story Im sad for you, So Im sending you a cheer up hug ok ! Well, it would be real easy to say just let him go. Because I feel if a man want's to be with a women,he will know it ,and he will be with her.No if's and's or but's. Forgive me for being so blunt,but this guy has asked you to "go sit in the waiting room" while he figures out his feeling on life and you ! Does he think you don't have any feeling's and a life,there for just sit back and wait ? Hopefully you think more highly of yourself then that! I know Id'e rather have a man thet's secure with his feeling's. Would'nt you? Good Luck ! P.S. "Tie your wagon to the star's and never stop beleaving in yourself !
2007-03-22 14:07:24 · answer #5 · answered by lkayj4 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello, I think he is afraid and a bit lost. Give him time but don't wait forever, just as long as you feel confortable, then call him and try to talk about the problems one more time and if it doesn't work just let it go. It is sad but you can't fix people's mind and you have a life to live.Good luck!
2007-03-22 11:30:36 · answer #6 · answered by yolaba 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
DON"T CALL HIM!!! DON"T HAVE SEX WITH HIM!!!
I would guess this is his way of dumping you. By his actions he has found someone else but he doesn't have the balls to tell you. I would also question the GF 2 year thing also. He sounds like a player and that you are the one getting played. Sorry!
2007-03-22 11:34:39 · answer #7 · answered by Plantoneonme 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds really immature. And mean.
Cut him loose. Luckily you've only been dating for 2.5 months. So really, not much of a loss of anything.
Hopefully he can get his stuff together.
In the meantime, don't wait around for him to 'treat you better.'
2007-03-22 11:26:20 · answer #8 · answered by Mimi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing is to give his some more time and space, since he really seems to love you.
2007-03-22 11:25:47 · answer #9 · answered by Avner Eliyahu R 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just give him as much time as he needs if its meant to be with him then he will come around...remember that he was cheated on so that will always be on his mind so he feels fear cause hes having stronger feeling for you, don't worry hell come around for the better.
2007-03-22 11:30:39 · answer #10 · answered by Jorgio 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋