My boyfriend and I have been together for almost a year and a half. A few months ago, he began pushing a friendship for a couple girls at our school, that also knew his brother. He seems to spend unusual time with them, like he sat alone in the back of a car with them for a good hour. I also don't know how much time he spends with them, I work a lot and he is at his brother's house a lot, where these girls hang out. Since he's started forming a friendship with them, our relationship has been very rough. One of the girls has even tried to hook arms with him and lean on him. He's hugged them both, and it's unusual for him to hug other people, it took us a long time to be comfortable to hug each other, about a month after we started dating. Do I have a right to feel so jealous and insecure?
2007-03-22 03:47:46 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It's amazing how many women don't understand how guys think.
Let's be clear, there is only one reason a guy wants a girl for a friend...and it isn't to be just friends. Otherwise they are more trouble then they are worth. Your boyfriend is looking for your replacement....is that clear enough?
2007-03-22 03:53:02 · answer #1 · answered by Just a friend. 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have NOT seen your boyfriend involved with these girls in an intimate or otherwise suggestive activity, then you have no case. These girls might just be really assertive and outgoing; they could be going through some tough times right now and your boyfriend could just be offering his attention to them. He might just be trying to work on his people skills. You said how it was impossible for you guys to hug the first month or so of your relationship; maybe he's working on eliminating the nervousness.
You have a right to feel however you want about whatever situation; I personally don't think that you have a viable reason yet though. Jealousy is a problem that EVERY human being exhibits; it can often trick us into doing things that we later regret.
The simplest thing to do is this -- sit down and talk with him about it. It's obviously enough of a concern to you, and you deserve a solid answer. When your boyfriend gives you his answer, you should believe him. If he's telling the truth and not cheating on you with these girls, you'll save yourself so much trouble and embarrassment. If he's not, then you'll have HIS word to combat his actions when you catch him in the act.
2007-03-22 03:58:06 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have reason but what good does having those feelings do you?Listen,what you are seeing right before your eyes is how being in so called love can blind you if you let it.Always see a situation for what it really is not what others say or even what you want.The situation is shady and something will happen if not already.When your lover does things that make you feel uncomfortable and doesn't seem to get it then you need to get it and clear out.You must learn now what's right for you and what's not,What you will stand for and what will knock you down.Never love any man more than your self,you must demand respect or you move on to a man who will give you that.You alone will teach people and men how to treat you by how you respond to treatment.
2007-03-22 03:57:27 · answer #3 · answered by punkin 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you have full right to feel the way that you feel. To me its an absolute sign of disrespect for him to let her all on him like that... whether you are there or not. If he's hugging these women and it took him so long to hug you... thats a little strange... I would talk to him about it, and let him know that this behavior is unacceptable.
2007-03-22 03:53:55 · answer #4 · answered by Scared 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your boyfriend is being unwise and is setting the relationship up for failure. Your feelings are natural. He should not be developing these types of friendships with other women just like you shouldn't with other men. There will be a lot of people who will disagree with me but the reality is, it is a recipe for disaster.
Good luck. I think a talk with him is in order if you haven't already shared your feelings with him.
2007-03-22 03:57:45 · answer #5 · answered by Stefka 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Would you "be allowed" to have male friends that you hug and sit with in the back of a car for an hour?
If not, neither is he!
If so, then trust him like he'd trust you????
If you don't know, go make some friends!!
2007-03-22 03:53:56 · answer #6 · answered by canguroargentino 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i think you have a right but i think you should talk to him about it and see what he says and talk to though girls also see what happens talk to them and say that's my man and i would like it if you stop trying to hang all over him you know well i think you should still talk to him about it do it over dinner and a movie and at the end of your date when you are on your way home talk to him about it and if you want you can send me a massage on yahoo and tell me how everything want i think you should talk to some people about it you know well her is my e-mail address alishabessette@yahoo.com i well like to hear from you....
2007-03-22 03:56:42 · answer #7 · answered by alisha bessette 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
of course u do. u better be cautious. if all that ur saying is true, then he may be cheating on u. try to get him to sit and talk with u. remind him why u love him and why he loves u. if he tries to avoid u, then he's interested in these girls that u speak of.
2007-03-22 03:53:56 · answer #8 · answered by D.Money 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it is wrong..
You have every right in feeling jealous & insecure..
2007-03-22 03:54:16 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah you have the right to feel that way. i would be pissed! maybe ask him if he likes them in any other way... but if that happend to me i would tell him if he wants to be that close to them go ahead but im leaving... so if its rough for you two dont torture yourself... find someone that deserves you
2007-03-22 03:52:56 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋