My friend (14) has been going out with a guy for about a year. I admit that he's funny and occasionally sweet. Unfortunately, he is just too much of a bad boy, and a bad boyfriend too.
He began smoking pot and cigarettes this summer, and also got arrested for minor arsen and resisting arrest. He is borderline cheating on my friend, focusing all his attention on his other friend, hugging and cuddling with her rather tan m friend.
My friend got mad at him for this and I encouraged her to break up with him. But he wrote her a note saying that he was a great boyfriend, he loved her, blah blah fluff he said to every girl, please dont break up with me. And she goes running back to him!
Now she ditches us for him, and walks away in the middle of the conversation so that they can makeout. This also scares me...I feel she might be pressured into sex, because he pressured her into making out.
What do I do? My friend needs to see the light and ditch him!
2007-03-21 18:07:51 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Also- her mom totally dissaproves of this, and believes they already broke up.
Her grades have also slipped since they began going out, she seems to think that if he gets in trouble (7 suspensions in 2 years!) and never does his work, its 'cool'.
It's not like this is the best she can get...she has several nice guys who would love to date her.
2007-03-21 18:10:13 · update #1
You cannot get her out of the world by yourself, you need Jesus-we all do. If you really want to help your friend then you will need to start going to a Christian church, put her name on prayer lists, let her meet guys who love the Lord-who are growing in love for God is love.
Your friend and many of us have gotten trapped in lust not in love because of living in the world (flesh lead versus being lead by the Spirit) and it is bigger than you or I, but nothing is too hard for God...If you truly care and want to do something, this is the real and only answer; seek God and you shall find Him.
That liar the devil, the deceiver, no longer can bring a worldly man, drugs, fear, worry, jealousy etc... in to destroy my life and steal my joy...No man without God will treat any women like a man who loves God for one serves God the other is the enemy of God... for the Word of God tells us that if we are not for Him, we are against Him and in order to know God, we need to read His letter He wrote to us (the Holy Bible).
Just look around at all the children whose childhood joy is ravished by worldly men, women, etc...Jesus is the healer and He can heal those things that hurt us when we were young and old...He died to do this for us; that is how much you are loved; anything less is just another lie from the deceiver; it is Written that God wishes none to perish...
I pray heavenly Father by your power and your Holy Spirit that you convict her heart in Jesus' precious name...
Now repeat this and mean it in your heart and later ask your friend to do the same:
Father, I am a sinner in need of a savior. Jesus I beleive you died on the cross for my sins and the Father rose You again three days later; come into my life, be the Lord of my life and my bestfriend and by your power and your Holy Sprit, guide me all the days of my life in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit; Amen...
And every angel rejoices...when just one comes home...
It is also written that it is wise to save souls...May God annoint you with the heart of an evangelist; first this friend, then another....They have the most awesome Youth groups these days going together all over the world.
Remember: couples who pray together stay together...
God puts before us blessings or cursings and we choose.
Praising the Lord for all He has done for me...for setting me free.
Sista C
2007-03-21 19:20:58 · answer #1 · answered by sista c 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Wow. This guy sounds like a real winner. There's not much you can do. If you stick your nose in, she'll only resent you and think you're trying to run her life. She's 14 so, odds are, this relationship will crash and burn. It's already crashing so, you only really need to wait for it to go down in flames.
You can't reason with her no matter what this guy is doing. She's not seeing reality at all and no one can make her do that. If you're truly concerned for her, have a talk with her mom but make sure her mom doesn't tell her where she got her info. If she finds out that you told on her, she'll never forgive you.
I know you want to help your friend so, I'm not going to say to mind your own business. You're actually being a really good friend but, you can't control other people's actions. Sometimes they have to totally mess up and lose everything to see what they're doing. I can assure you, this guy will end the relationship soon enough. Let nature run it's course but, as I said, if you're really concerned for her well being, talk to her mom but don't let it be known you talked to her or told her anything. Good luck hun.
2007-03-21 18:15:54 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your friend is her own person and this may be one of those life lessons she has to learn on her own. A couple of years from now you'll both look back at this situation and she'll say ' OMG! I cant believe I went out with... but he was so totally hott'. It sounds like she's trying new things and this may seem like dangerous ground... however you may just be feeling upset about being left behind by your best friend. Concentrate on your own life because no matter how much you try you wont ever be able to control your friends life.. youll just end up pushing her away or making her feel bad for doing things that are natural.. like having sex, 'making out', etc. If you talk to her like you are her mother shell block you out... what you can do is talk to her like a friend. If she is having sex make sure she knows how to do it safely and you can both read on it together. If she decides to fo drugs with her boyfriend let her know the risks... and make sure you know the facts and dont just tell her its wrong because your mom said so. This is your chance to bond as best friends.. not to make her feel like an outsider because she's going through things you dont quite understand yet. If you really think she is in some kind of physical danger then let her know youre worried and if necessary let someone else know like your own mom.. but only if you think there is any real danger.
2007-03-21 18:27:56 · answer #3 · answered by itsSCIENCE 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Why do not you depart a few expertise related to abuse in a position in which you realize she is going to discover it however he may not. Sometimes humans are too ashamed to confess they're in an abusive courting however desire out and do not know the way. Look up web pages, and if I knew a few I'd supply them to you, with numbers to name or seem up areas which are nearby that might support her out. It leaves the expertise nameless, however it is a minimum of a begin.
2016-09-05 11:39:55 · answer #4 · answered by pizzaro 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if he really is cheating on her than remind your friend he is and that he is just lying and not good enough for your friend. Tell your friend it is the best choice and to avoid getting hurt to dump him.but again it is your friends decision (even though it is the best choice to dump him because that her life and mom go better without him in her life)
2007-03-21 18:12:22 · answer #5 · answered by Lilyan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Email me her name and phone number I will call her mother myself and tell her about her daughter. fort_bragg_girl@yahoo.com
2007-03-21 18:14:58 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋