My father committed suicide after killing my step mother......?

Question

I want to know if I and the family pray for his forgiveness with he be forgiven? What if before he did this if he prayed and asked Gods forgiveness? What is you thought on this. He's been gone 21 years........ I am just now dealing with the hatred that I felt towards him for doing what he did........... I have forgiving him but has God.

I was once told you can't pray some one into heaven. what do you think. My father had mental problems and was told he needed to seek help which he never did. Do you think that God knows he wasn't in his right mind..... that he didn't do this just because he thought "you no I think i'll go kill her and myself nothing better to do" He was mentaly desturbed.

I left my computer and got to thinking. I did not tell you how sorry I am for the death of my stepmother. That I do pray that her family is doing ok and has forgiven my father. I know it must be hard for one to forgive a murderer but it is possible. I pray that she is in heaven and that she too has forgiven my father.

Answer 1

The Bible says God's ways are higher than our ways, and his thoughts higher than our thoughts.

I don't think we can understand how he thinks or judges others or things

He is a just and good God

I do not think that he judges or has the thoughts that we have, because we are mortal man and he is not

He does not think the way we do, I do not think that he judges the mentally handicapped as he does others who are not

He deals in and with according to our ability, so you see, that cannot be so

I think he is forgiven and is in heaven and your stepmother, they were not wicked or evil people, just weak, so that is another story

So many think they know and can judge for God,

I think God is fair and just and good, and his ways past finding out,

Forgive him and you will find forgiveness for yourself, in that you will find peace

I know my uncle, married to my blood aunt, committed suicide and it was a horrible thing for his family
Also a very good and dear friend did the same.

I do not think the God I serve would do anything but love and forgive them even more so than others

Let go of this and you will free yourself

May God tenderly watch over you
and care for you

Answer 2

The idea of, or belief in, intercessory prayers in behalf of departed souls living (and perhaps suffering) in some spiritual realm conflicts with the Scriptural teaching that the dead are not conscious of anything. (Ecclesiastes 9:5, 10)

Although self-inflicted death is never justified, never righteous, the apostle Paul did hold out a beautiful hope for even some unrighteous ones. As he told a Roman court of law: “I have hope toward God . . . that there is going to be a resurrection of both the righteous and the unrighteous.”—Acts 24:15.

Only God can fully understand the role of mental sickness, extreme stress, even genetic defects, in a “suicidal crisis,” which, the National Observer noted, “is not a lifetime characteristic [but] often a matter only of minutes or of hours.”—See Ecclesiastes 7:7. Granted, one who takes his own life deprives himself of the opportunity to repent of his self-murder. But who can say whether one driven to suicide might have had a change of heart had his fatal attempt failed? Some notorious murderers have, in fact, changed and earned God’s forgiveness during their lifetime.—2 Kings 21:16; 2 Chronicles 33:12, 13. As far as the one who rashly took his own life is concerned, we humans cannot judge as to whether he will get a resurrection or not. God alone searches ‘all hearts and every inclination of the thoughts.’ (1 Chronicles 28:9)

But we may be confident that ‘the Judge of all the earth is going to do what is loving, just, and right!’—Genesis 18:25.

Answer 3

Oh, hon, my heart goes out to you. What an awful situation to have to deal with. Its the toughest one, because you have all these unresolved questions you want to ask and can't. First, though, if you've found forgiveness in your heart that's a wonderful thing and obviously you've seen God's mind in the matter. To love the unloveable and to forgive the unforgiveable is the true definition of God. And as for how God feels about your father's actions. . . well, murder is a sin in God's eyes. But many other things are also, including fornication, adultery, lying, stealing . .. but these are things we see everyday, and we tolerate and find understanding for. There's a scripture in 1 Cor 6:9-11 that talks about people who lived these things, yet became Christians and were "washed clean" - these things were washed away so they weren't visible anymore. If those things were, so would something like murder, either of self or other people. In Romans, it says the wages sin (the missing of the mark of perfection) is death. Your father paid that price. So did you stepmother. So does every other human who has walked this planet. Romans also states that "he who has died has been aquitted from his sin." Death cancels out anything we could do in this life; when we miss the mark of perfection the punishment we receive is death. But that scripture goes on to say the "gift God gives is everlasting life." Honey, your willingness to forgive is evidence of your faith and your love for God. Don't worry about your father. As far as God is concerned, he knows the circumstances of your father's actions and forgives. Your father will get a resurrection as promised in the Bible in John 5:28, 29, and that resurrection is of the "righteous and the unrighteous". He knows your father's heart. And he knows yours, too. To forgive, to understand, is to know God's heart. :)

Answer 4

Wow. Well first off I give you credit for forgiving him because he left you with a lot to deal with for the rest of your life for his actions of killing.But in some case I see why you forgive him because seriously you can not let that bother you for the rest of your life. It's not worth it. You will be so much happier if you put that behind you exect it for what it was and move on. I believe that if you forgive him in your heart, God has too. God has helped you to forgive. I know some people might have their own opinions on whether there is a GOD and blah blah blah because their prayers were not answered to their liking...we all have had that but there was a reason that they were not answered. I strongly believe in the fact that "EVERYHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON". As bad as things my seem at times. Good luck and stay strong. I support you for forgiving because I know how tough that must be for you. I am praying for you and your family. Take care

Answer 5

I believe if your father was a christian during his lifetime, God has forgiven all of his sins. Just because he sinned before he died doesn't mean he's going to hell. I don't believe God will disregard out commitment to him if we sinned before we've had a chance to say our nightly prayer. Also, I do believe that God will take into consideration, his state of mind. If he did truely repent before he died, I'm sure he made it to heaven.
The bible tells a story of a man who went out and kept hiring new workers throughout the day. The workers who started early in the morning expected that they would be paid more than those who began late in the afternoon. But the man of the vineyard paid each man the same, just as he had said he would. The parable teaches that no matter when you give your life to God, he will give you the same reward as everyone else who have given their life to him.
As for you, I would call the suicide hotline (1-800 SUICIDE), they might be able to refer you to some support group or sometimes inexpensive therapist that might help you get through this if that's something you're up for. Or it might help to just talk about it.

Answer 6

I am sorry for your loss.

You can rest assured that your father did what he did because it was part of the lessons he was meant to learn in this life. God will not punish him, but support him in his next lifetime so he may continue learning, just as we all do.

Even if your beliefs don't include reincarnation, consider this: You say you have forgiven your father, and most people consider forgiveness a trait associated with high morals. Wouldn't you expect God to have at least as high morals as you do? If you believe forgiving him is the right thing to do, and you have done so, doesn't it make sense to assume that God would also do the right thing? Why would a loving God give us a system of morals and then not follow it himself?

In other words, hopefully you believe in a God that follows his own moral standards. Otherwise, he would be inferior to his creations, which I'm sure you don't believe.

Answer 7

First I must explain that I am an atheist, so I can't help with your question about God forgiving your father. In my opinion your father ceased to exist when his brain quit functioning.

I think the more important questions have to do with you and how you plan to lead the rest of your life. While you got half your DNA from your father you are not him. You are a unique individual and you have free will as to how you spend your life. You might not be able to find any lessons in examining your father's life except to serve as a warning. Every day we make decisions and those decisions lead us down a path. The path we take will determine what decisions we have available to us in the future. Obviously your father went down a path that lead him to a conclusion that he had nothing to live for.

You need to make sure that is not the path you take. Establish goals for yourself. Look for role models. Have a vision of how you want to live, what kind of person you want to be. Develop a plan for making that vision a reality and start taking action to make that happen.

Good luck to you.

Answer 8

The God that I know is a God of Love, compassion and forgiveness. If your father was mentally ill, it was his mental illness that caused this tragedy. God will have mercy on him. It is hard to forgive such a deep hurt as this, and it is good that you are getting help to do so. It will allow you to go on with your life.

I think that the people in heaven or purgatory pray for us. I think that when they have done something in this life that has harmed us they are made aware of the impact that it had on our life. And because God is helping them to heal and teaching them to love as He loves, they will pray for us. The result of their prayers is that people and circumstances come into our life that help us to heal.

God bless.

Answer 9

this is something that is only known between his heart and God

am sad to hear that things made him feel that there was no other way out ..... am sure your sadness and burden has been great ....
but know that your own healing from this does come from your forgiveness of his actions but still love him as your earthly father

you can pray that another can be reached by God but you cannot pray for another persons forgiveness and them be forgiven for thisdue to your prayer- is a personal matter - just as the sealing of your eternal destiny determined between your heart and God - the Word states the acceptance or rejection of Christ is what seals eternal fate

he may have prayed before and of course it did not affect the outcome but can only hope that he found peace with God then since could not find it in life before ending both their lives

this is the thing we as humans must learn - our choices generally do not affect only us - they have rollover affects to those about us, our families and others dependent upon the choice

two things are certain - death and eternity - so very important that our hearts are right with God at all times

God is right where He has always been - waiting with outstretched arms ...... if there is distance between you and Him - He is not the one who moved.

I pray that you find the peace you seem to be searching for!!

Answer 10

The older I get the more I know I just can't grasp the love and compassion of God. If you find it in your heart to forgive him,and God dosen't that means that God is not as loving of forgiving than you.No way! I don't know how He works it all out,but He does.This may sound silly but it helps me...just pray and thank God for fixing it all,even though you don''t know how he is doing it. It helps me alot.