i have lowself confidence.i feel ashamed to be overweight and my parents make it worse.wat can i do?

Question

im only 14 and im 180pounds!my dad calls me fat whenever the subject comes up!!!he makes me feel so fat and unwanted that i might as well die.i think hes ashamed and embarresed to have a fat daughter.so wat i do now is only wear hoodies to hide my pot belly every single day!is there anything out there to live for?just somebody let know if there is?!

Answer 1

Do you have any idea how many millions of girls have been told they were "the fat one" or "the ugly one" when they were young but then amazed everyone with their beauty and success at their 10-year reunion?

There is always time to begin eating healthier and/or exercising more, and that does a lot for a person's body shape. At some point you may want to change your lifestyle in pursuit of feeling better in your own skin and your own clothes. Right now though, you need someone who'll listen. This is just random online advice, so if you feel worse and worse, tell your parents to find you a therapist since they can't seem to be there for you right now. If they don't make the calls for you, find a way to call on your own.

Answer 2

Oh, there's MANY things to live for! You will see soon. By the way, it is your parents who most likely caused your lack of self confidence. They do that so they can control you, or because they just don't understand much. When you grow up more, you'll probably turn to drugs and become some kind of drug addict, because it helps the pain go away, which was caused by your parents to begin with. (You will realize that after about 25 years of being a drug addict. Once you realize the cause of the drug addiction, then you stop-but only then).

Realize, start now, that this is YOUR life, not your parents life, and that YOU are a person, not some doll-like child. Don't let them get you down. If they do, and they will, then pick yourself back up. And take a good long look in the mirror and say "Do I like this person? And How am I gonna change what I don't like?". There are answers to your problems. They may not come easy, but they are there. Look for them. Do what is needed.

Answer 3

Well to start off, ur dad was probably one of those serverly fat kids who was picked on all the time at school, u have to ignore what he says. and embrase urself for the person that u are!
wear watever u want and stop hiding, be proud for who u r, and dont let urself be bullied by him!

Answer 4

Accountability- By Hiromi Kurihara

The word “ACCOUNTABILITY” is usually used when we say things like, “Be accountable for this, resign!”

In addition, when we ask people to “be accountable”, it almost seems as if we are blaming them. Therefore, we need to fully understand the phrase ‘accountability’ so that we will not misunderstand it.

Accountability actually means that we take responsibility for all the experiences that we experience in our lives, because they are a result of our own choice. This may sound really simple to comprehend but in order to fully understand it, one needs a high level of maturity.

When we meet problems, we tend to move into the victim role. When this happens, we will very quickly be overwhelmed by negative emotions and feel a sense of helplessness.

The victim mindset refers to the mindset where one feels that if the people around him/her do not change, they will be unable to enjoy happiness. Victims also often hope that people will change because they feel they are already helpless.

Of course, it is possible to have unpleasant experiences because of other people’s actions and words. However, when we keep thinking that we are a victim, it is as if we want the other person will feel guilty so badly that we hurt ourselves and let the red blood flow on their doorstep.

In our minds, we just want to tell the other person, “It is all your fault, you made me like this!” However, despite doing that, the incident that caused the wound has still not healed and thus we are unable to grow, unable to heal and unable to change because of this.

We can choose to become victims because of other people’s actions and words and become unhappy for the rest of our lives. But we can also admit that we have the power to choose to avoid this hurt, or the ability to minimize the hurt and view this just as an invaluable experience.

In addition, we can also expand our horizons and look into the choices that our sub conscious mind, unconscious mind and group consciousness has made so that we can look deeper and understand the things that are happening to us.

A psychologist Ronger fainted for no reason when he was young. When he was in semi conciousness, he heard a voice in his heart that said, “Then I wouldn’t have to go to school.”

After that, when he found out that his parents used all their wealth to try to treat his unknown illness, he was very shocked.

There was one night where he felt he was going to faint. He read and studied in full concentration for one whole night to fight with the desire to faint. Since then, his strange illness did not recur.

It seems that the moral of the story is that Ronger found that his subconscious mind made a choice and mused up his courage to make a new choice. But in actual fact, this is not the case. The real moral of this story is that we should never view ourselves as small, helpless beings. We should always remember that we have the ability to create something big.

A lot of people think that if we choose not to play the victim role and blame other people, it means we have to blame ourselves instead. But in actual fact, this is not true. The real essence of not seeing ourselves as a victim is never to see ourselves as small and insignificant and always remember that we have the ability to create something big.

When we are accountable and responsible, we can rebuild hope and trust. Trust that our experiences now and in future will all happen because of the choices that we make.

The Power Of Choice
The most valuable power that mankind has is the Power of Choice. In our life, we are constantly faced with the possibility of making a choice.

We can choose what to eat, what to wear, what to learn, what to do and who to live with. Even if we are sick or poor, even if the choices seem scarce, we can still choose our own attitudes towards these events.

Forgiveness, love, letting go (of attachment), enjoyment, gratitude, trust, acceptance are all choices that no one can take away from you. When you decide to make a beautiful choice, no matter what situation you are in right now, you can achieve a victorious life ahead.

Even if no one is looking at you, you can humbly and proudly live the life that you want.

Jewish psychiatrist Wekedor Frank was sent to a concentration camp during World War 2 and miraculously survived death. He felt that his mental strength was stretched to the extreme during this period and thus decided use this as research material.

When he was in concentration camp, he was badly tortured and not treated like a human being. He also had little hope for survival and did not know when his life would end. Most people deduced that he would be like other people they know- he would either go insane and drop in the abyss of misery.

Frank however did not lose respect for life because of this. He constantly seeked a balance by loving himself and caring for other people. He is proof that there are still a lot of other people who still choose ‘the choice of living’ and continue to live an exciting and colourful life on this earth.

Rather than feeling depressed and giving up on themselves, these people surprisingly achieve growth and were able to live and outstanding life and show off their potential.

Frank’s story tells us that even if you are an unknown, even if no one cares if you are alive or dead… until you die, everyone has the power of choice.

Of course, it is a lot easier to become a victim. If we do not constantly strive to be awakened we would fall into this trap easily and give up our power of choice. Please stop right where you are right now, change your directions and make a new choice using your power of choice.