So we got a call the other day that my husband's Grandmother is on her way out (really soon). I plan on attending the wake & funeral with my husband. I am not close with his side of the family so I always feel uncomfortable talking to them about anything (especially someone's death).
I need some kind words to pass along to his step-mom at the wake (it's his step grandmother that is dying). They're not really religious (and neither are we) so I don't really feel comfortable mentioning God or heaven at all. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.
**Serious answers only please**
2007-03-21 14:03:17 · 7 answers · asked by Laura C 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
It's always hard to find the right thing to say.
when I have had a loss, I always hated when people said they 'were sorry' it made me feel like saying 'it will be ok' or think they were at fault somehow. I would just let her know that you are there and if there is anything you can do to help during this time that you are there, and maybe relate a story that you remember of her. It always makes people feel better to remember happier times. Another favorite is 'she has touched so many lives, she live in memory forever' or a version of that.
2007-03-21 14:19:50 · answer #1 · answered by dana j 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just try and be there to listen to her and comfort her...and keep reassuring her that u are there for her if she (or the family) needs anything and when nothing else works a Hug and a shoulder to cry on always works sometimes its not our words but our actions that bring the most comfort. Good Luck!
2007-03-21 14:17:17 · answer #2 · answered by naynayjo 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just say sorry for your loss & she is no longer in pain!!
When my step dad passed away that's what everyone said to us (he had throat cancer for 18 months & towards the end he was on methadone & fentenyl patches) The only one of his family to really comfort me was his baby brother (even the brother I used to call uncle ignored my family)! everyone shook our hands & said it's ok but his baby brother actually let me cry in his arms & said that he was no longer in pain & he was in peace!! That helped alot! His baby brother is the only one who cared. I know the family didn't like my mom or sister since they were mad that my step dad divorced his 1st wife & years later married my mom but he was also the black sheep of the family. His family was real uppity & talked down to us even the brother we used to be close to but not anymore. They actually acted like they were happy he was gone!! They didn't help us pay for the funeral (his twin & baby brother only gave us $) or get him flowers. We payed for everything (His twin & baby brother didn't want to be shunned for helping so we kept it quiet)!! To this day I can't believe that I cried on his baby brothers shoulder I absolutely HATE crying in public!! I was ok till the funeral when they handed my mom his flag (he was a vietnam veteran) & played taps I finally broke down!! Whe he went into the war instead of running to canada he became the black sheep then when he divorced his 1st wife they didn't talk to him!! We only met his family twice at his mother's funeral (where I mistakenly called a sister by the wrong name & got slapped for it (I was 15 & not good w/ names)! The first time was when I was 4-5 & we were living w him & his 2 sisters & brother told us that we had to leave because he didn't have permission for us to live with him. We had been evicted because the landlord sold the house with out our knowledge & never told us. We would have been on the street if not for him!! We were only there for 2 weeks when I looked up & saw three heads at the top of the heads & screamed!! That night be took what we had & went to a hotel & he never saw his family till his mother's wake. He couldn't even stand his family he said they were out for the all mighty dollar & nothing else!!
I hope this helps!!
2007-03-21 16:58:56 · answer #3 · answered by Missy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You suggested you adore her and you permit out her. now and lower back tears merely are available at distinctive cases. You cant stress them, there is not something incorrect. there is not any precise/incorrect thank you to grieve. each and every thing will fall back into place, you will see. God bless you and your babies.
2016-11-27 20:52:44 · answer #4 · answered by slagle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just say the memories will still be alive and sorry for your lost and i will be there when or if u need to and just keep her in your heart forever and shell always be with u watching over u
2007-03-21 14:16:37 · answer #5 · answered by dvcgurl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would say at least shes not in pain your not mentioning god but you are saying shes not suffering maybe also that is natural to die and it will be ok
2007-03-21 14:27:16 · answer #6 · answered by donielle 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Take her hand, or put your hand on her arm and say "I am so sorry for you loss". That's it.
2007-03-21 14:14:20 · answer #7 · answered by Dee 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋