Blonde jokes!! (no offence blondes!!)?

Question

a blonde walks up to a store. she askes the man, "How much is that TV around the corner?"
He replies: "sry, i dont serve blondes."
Shocked, the blonde walks away and goes home. She comes back the next day, with brown hair now, and asked:"How much is that TV around the corner?"
And once again, he said he doesnt serve blondes.

She comes back the next day with RED hair. "How much is that TV around the corner?"
Again, "I serve no blondes!"
The blonde replies: "how on eath do u know im BLONDE!?"
The man says: "Miss, thats not a TV around the corner, its a MICORAVE!!!"

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A blonde is flying in an airplane to Dallas. She notices an empty seat wy ahead of her in FIRST CLASS. She decides to sit there. The stuardist walks up to her and says: " sorry miss, thats for first class only!"
The blonde replies: "i dont care. Im blonde. im beautiful. And im flyinf first class to Dallas."

Heres the rest of the joke:

"well, im gonna have to have a word with the piolots about this and..."
"i dont care. Im blonde. im beautiful. And im flyinf first class to Dallas."

She gets the captain. The captain says: "You will have police waiting 4 u at the end of this flight, if u dont move!!"
"i dont care. Im blonde. im beautiful. And im flyinf first class to Dallas."
The co-piolot walks up and whispers sumthing in her ear. She automatically walks up, and gets back to her seat. "how did u do that?" asked the piolot.
"I told her 1st class wasnt going to Dallas."


LOL

GOD DRUMMER...
IM BLONDE DONT MAKE FUN OF ME

Answer 1

I have heard the first one before....still kinda funny.

the second one ..............new but I don't think that it is funny.

Answer 2

Sign! SO many blonde jokes, so little time.

From a Blonde's diary:

I walked into a Blimpie's with a buy-one-get-one-free coupon for a sandwich. I handed it to the girl and she looked over at a little chalkboard that said "buy one-get one free". "They're already buy-one-get-one-free", she said, "so I guess they're both free". She handed me my free sandwiches and I walked out the door.
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One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when one of Them shouted, "Look at that dead bird!" Someone looked up at the sky and said, "Where?"
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While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, "Does the sun rise in the north?"When my brother explained that the sun rises in the east, and has For sometime, she shook her head and said, "Oh, I don't keep up with That stuff."
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I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center Was open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week." He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?" Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, "Uh, Pacific."
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My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk.
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My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount.
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I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area, so I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me, "has your plane arrived yet?"
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While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. "Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces."
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They walk among us, AND they reproduce!

Answer 3

Those were good, especially the second one. Here's a few more:

Q: How do blonde braincells die?
A: Alone.

A blonde decides to learn and try horse back riding unassisted without prior experience or lessons. She mounts the horse with great effort, and the tall, shiny horse springs into motion.

It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle. Out of shear terror, she grabs for the horse's mane but cannot seem to get a firm grip. She tries to throw her arms around the horse's neck, but she slides down the side of the horse anyway. The horse gallops along, seemingly oblivious to its slipping rider.

Finally, giving up her frail grip, she leaps away from the horse to try and throw herself to safety.

Unfortunately, her foot has become entangled in the stirrup. She is now at the mercy of the horse's pounding hooves as her head is struck against the ground again and again. As her head is battered against the ground, she is mere moments away from unconsciousness or even death when Frank, the Wal-Mart manager runs out to shut the horse off.

Answer 4

I am a blonde and even I know that you can't walk up to a store and be able to talk to the cashier. you got to open the damn door, walk in and go to the counter! :)) (Don't spend to much time on that one, you might hurt your head!)

Have a great night.
Kristy

Answer 5

lol
lmao
1st 1 is old
never heard the 2nd 1 though
lol

Answer 6

i have a blonde joke!

theres a blonde, brunette, and a red head. they are stranded in the desert, but are allowed to have one thing each. the brunette asks for water. "in case we get thirsty". the red head asks for food. "in case we get hungry". the blonde brings a CAR DOOR!!!!!!

"so we can roll down the window in case we get hot"

LOLz! xD yay for blonde jokes! i thought the horse one was especially funny. i'm gonna tell it to all my friends xD

Answer 7

HAHA tha 2nd 1 iz reel funni!

Answer 8

Um... yeah. Here you are telling blonde jokes and you can't eve spell pilots. "piolots". Yeah.... you shouldn't be talking. P.S. The second one sucked.

Answer 9

they were both great once i read the end of the second one, good job

Answer 10

OMIGOSH!! I tell the first all the time, but I've never heard the second one.... I LOVED IT!!