There is mutual interest and attraction between us but we're still getting to know each other and have not made any decisions on dating. Do you tell someone before you go out with them or after you decide to date? I want to be viewed as a woman and not a mom. My kids are teenagers and I don't bring guys home and sleep with them, much less pick up random guys.
2007-03-21 12:13:55 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Kudos to you for keeping him out of your kids life. You sound like a great mom.
I would tell him before it gets too serious and he gets his heart invested. He may not want to be a step dad. But your children are part of you and they make up who you are. He needs to know where your priorities are. If he is not willing to deal with children now, then even when he is serious with you, that won;t change. I would just let him know that you have children and let him know that they are your priority. Since you aren't bringing him to your house, he won't see you in Mom mode. Besides what are you going to do when one of your kids gets sick or something comes up and you have to cancel a date with him? that is not the time to tell him. And what if he saw you at the store or somewhere with your kids, he may feel a little betrayed.
You don't have to introduce him to your kids, just tell him that you have kids and that you are a package deal, but that you decide when it is right for them to meet them, not him, not the kids. I mean really do you want to fall in love with him, only to find out that he does not want step kids.
2007-03-21 12:40:14 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi! You should tell him from the beginning. There is nothing wrong with being a mother, don't be ashamed of that! If he can't accept you, then; is this really the type of guy that you want to date? You are a beautiful person, so do not sell yourself short for fear of rejection. And, by the way, I am also a mother of two. Hope this helps.
2007-03-21 12:19:21 · answer #2 · answered by jingzshit37 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Slip it in fairly soon. They are in their teens, the man you're dating wouldn't be responsible for raising them.
I would want to know by a second or third date. Any later and I would be turned off by them withholding the information.
My boyfriend told me he was divorced on our first date. Even though I was taken back, I was happy to know that he didn't hide something so important from me.
2007-03-21 12:19:00 · answer #3 · answered by Alice M. Ayres 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
if he's a good guy, he will take it like a man and accept it. if not, then you know he's an *** and you should be happy not to invest more time in him. you should have told him straight up, don't deny what you are! a real man wont be threatened by any kids. you have the right idea about not bringing men home, that's your childrens home too.
2007-03-21 12:19:01 · answer #4 · answered by kiss_me_cold_007 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tell him right off the bat. Don't hold it back, because it could make him uncomfortable if you tell him after you're dating, and you shouldn't treat your kids like an afterthought. He should see you as a woman, kids or no kids.
2007-03-21 12:18:55 · answer #5 · answered by Dee 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
if you have kids you have kids. my wife had kids when we met and almost never seen them, don't keep secrets
2007-03-21 12:19:41 · answer #6 · answered by cankorworm 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋