I have a little girl who is 2 and a half right now. She has been living with her mother for all of her life mainly because I have been stationed in Japan. Well I am due to come back to the U.S. in September, and I would like to start setting up a case to get some custody of my little angel. Her mother currently lives with HER mother, she owes money to the courts for traffic stuff, and she has been using my child support money to pay that off, she pulled my daughter out of day-care because she cannot afford it anymore, and she blames me for her problems everytime we talk to each other. Basically I am tired of hearing it, and I don't think now is the best time for her to be trying to raise our daughter. I have tried to talk to her about willingly letting our daughter live with me for a time, but now it seems I'll have to go the road I don't want to go down. So what do I do to make sure I can get some sort of custody?
2007-03-21
10:40:34
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8 answers
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asked by
Allan R
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in
Family & Relationships
➔ Family
It doesn't matter that you are in the Military and where stationed else where, she can not keep your child from you. I would go to the courts and show them that you have been paying child support and you would like JOINT Custody of your daughter. Because your daughter is little and not of school age yet apply for shared living arrangements, which is 3 and a half days a week, if you are living relatively close to each other this will work (same town).
The courts no longer base their choice of parents on the sex of the parent, they are very capable of deciding the best interest of the child.
It is in the best interest of your child for the mother and you to come to some agreement, and with joint custody she can not make any choices like medical educational etc without your permission and nor can you.
Good luck God Bless. Oh yes I am a female and I know the court System and Joint is the most common arrangement now adays
2007-03-21 12:04:45
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answer #1
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answered by Marla D 3
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First off it goes without saying that you need a lawyer
Then you have to consider what arguments there will be and something to prove against them. Do not tell your ex what you are up to no matter how much she pisses you off.
Second make sure you keep your pay stubs that show you have been paying your child support.
Third buy a little tape recorder and a notebook. Keep track of your conversations date, time, length and what was said.
The tape recorder is just in case things turn sour. This proves you have regular or attempted communication with your child.
Fourth print out any email from your ex or from you.
Fifth make sure you are gainfully employed. Have a CLEAN, SAFE and properly stocked home prefferably in a decent neighborhood. Make sure that you are properly insured (health for your child and yourself, auto, home or renters).
Make sure your car is clean and serviceable.
Show that you can provide proper child care while you are at work.
You have to prove that your ducks are in a row. So having a will that indicates who you would want to take care of your child is a good idea as well as the distribution of your assets. Also make sure you have a copy of a monthly budget. A few savings account stubs showing some kind emergancy fund would be in order as well. This all shows fiscal responsibility which effects all areas of your daily life.
This advice will make the difference in a custody battle to get your daugther away from her mother. So dont skip a step.
This is quite a little bit of work but when it comes down to custody you have to dazzle the judge with how responsible you are versus your ex.
2007-03-21 11:16:06
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answer #2
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answered by redrogue60 2
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Why is the court system dominated by females? I really don't find that to be true. If it is your opinion, then one thing you could do is hire a female attorney. Your chances for getting custody of a different s*x child vary from state to state, but usually the court sides with the mother in the case of raising a minor child. Has your wife abused your daughter, has she shown anger and hostility towards her? Unless you can prove abuse or neglect you have a very weak case. The best you can get out of this is visitation for right now. Don't worry you'll be paying heavily for support for the next 16 years so get something out of it such a visitation 3x a week. Good luck.
2007-03-21 10:51:36
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answer #3
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answered by green3ch 6
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it sounds bad, but use those things against her. Not to sound bad, but make sure that the court sees that you are more stable. Get your own living arrangements (NOT with a roommate or girlfriend)..... you already have stable job history, and use the fact that your daughter's been yanked out of daycare due to costs, and they have no PERMANENT independent house to live in! Granted, the courts are more favorable to mothers, but in the circumstances of stability in a 2 year old's life, they need it! Fight for custody, and be sure to have a backup plan with your attorney (YOU NEED AN ATTORNEY. DO NOT ATTEMPT THIS ON YOUR OWN) on what visitation rights you DO want, if they leave custody with the mother. Things like every other weekend, maybe a day during the week until she goes to school, longer periods of time for summer months.............. go for the most, and you will be sure to get something you can live with. But be sure to get an attorney and check references, and how many cases he's worked that have worked out in his client's favor...........good luck!
2007-03-21 10:50:26
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answer #4
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answered by it'sjustme79 3
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First of all you will want to show that you are in a stable condition to take custody of your child or even joint custody.
Get a apt/house for you and your child to live in that is steady and permanent for a certain length of time.
Check out daycares and find one that you feel is suitable for your child and suits her best interest. If you dont want to go with a daycare, and want a family member/friend to watch your child make sure they have good references or are certified.
Make sure you can prove you are in good health and can provide a stable environment for your daughter.
Get a lawyer that specializes in custody battles. Most lawyers have free consultations that you can talk to them and share your concerns and what you want. Go with the lawyer that you feel most confident in and that is willing to go the distance for you and your child. good luck.
2007-03-21 11:19:00
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answer #5
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answered by hopefloats 3
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might wanna have some sources for the information, i will believe you reason females nevertheless win the toddlers the final public of the courts circumstances. yet...i think of....it sort of feels that way because of the fact nicely who might confess, ***** and make it regularly happening that 'i gained me da bebes?" nicely females, once you notice a father get the toddlers that's genuine hush hush, i recommend even on television those lawsuits that's many times the dumbass deadbeat father who hoed around, spouse beater, baby molester, the likes...consistently seems the case. yet with circumstances that i've got seen the place the father gets it reason the mum is foul is like...boring or some thing. reason i say it is reason my mom worked at a courthouse and she or he had thousands of comments to tell approximately divorces n what no longer. exceptionally exciting stuff. individually they ought to heavily survey the features of the two mom and father in the previous picking who will obtain the baby, that total supply it to the mum besides the actuality that that's blatantly obtrusive the father deservers the baby or the baby is HAPPIER with the father is so damn unfair. Ain't my fault i grow to be born a guy and don't wade with the aid of exertions like females do, i are not getting the place they think of they love their baby extra effective than the father, hell there is fathers that love their toddlers WAAAY extra effective than any mom ought to.
2016-10-02 12:56:58
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answer #6
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answered by Anonymous
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You need a lawyer plan and simple
2007-03-21 10:43:29
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answer #7
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answered by Anonymous
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BY PROVING YOU ARE THE BETTER PARENT
2007-03-21 10:44:20
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answer #8
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answered by Heather 4
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