well my gf broke up with me last march after we had been together for about 2 years. . . she started hanging out with this guy i knew from hs the next day and she knew i hated him and she proceeded to mess around with him like a week after we broke up which was really inconsiderate to me. The reason for the breakup was that she wanted to date around and she said she knew we would get back together sometime. Well it has been almost a year now and they have been together ever since(even though only officially for about 6-7 months) but anyways . . i tried to get her back for the first 2 months and it wasnt going anywhere so I went nc in june and i have been ever since. for the first 6 months she would try calling, texting,emailing . .anything to try to get me to talk to her. . even emailed me on our anniversary that said "today was 2 years" . . she would try to contact me on average every 1-3 weeks for 6 months. she even tried to get me to hang out with her . . continued below
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21 minutes ago
she even tried to gee me to come to her bday party when he was going to be there . .knowing that it would cause a fight . . .then there was a break from december till just a week ago when she sent me another email saying "just wondering if ur done hating me yet". .. i just dont get it . .. she seems happy from what I can tell . . she going on sb with her bf and everything . . why is she trying to contact me after 9 months of me not contacting her back? . . what does she want? What do u think is going on in her head?
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12 minutes ago
i can understand like the first couple months because maybe she wasnt sure about her new bf . . but it has been a year and she is still trying to contact me . . .wouldnt she get the hint when i havent responded in 9 months? If she was that happy then why would she still be doing this?
2007-03-21 08:49:14 · 9 answers · asked by osb2904 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
sounds like she is preying on your hatred/misery, or she feels guilty for what she has done...
2007-03-21 08:53:59 · answer #1 · answered by licydechorerra 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like she's not happy-- or a particularly good person. You, my friend, are an attempted victim of the Fallback Date ploy. Unfortunately for her, you are a smart guy. I'm so glad you've been staying out of contact with her!
In most situations when one half of a couple decides to "date other people," the relationship is getting stale or boring to them. They want to experience new personalities, physical attention styles, etc. In a healthy break-up situation, the breaker will leave the breakee alone. But with the Fallback Date ploy, the breaker will make it clear (usually through continued contact) that they are keeping their ex on the backburner as a backup plan should their new relationship fail.
Right now, your ex is probably regretting her actions. She most likely realized to begin with that her dating around might not work out, but she figured that since you still cared for her, you would take her back. Thankfully, you haven't. It's a sad fact, but women like her are usually only in a relationship for what they can get out of it.
If you had taken her back, chances are big that she would've broken your heart again-- not to mention her current boyfriend's heart. I know you don't like him, but you know how much a breakup can hurt; don't put him through the same pain.
2007-03-21 09:13:11 · answer #2 · answered by janeowyn180 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u don't really know how things are with those two. she doesn't sound happy; if she was, she wont feel the need to contact u. sounds like she is not getting what she needs from this guy and she is constantly thinking about u and hopes u will respond. she will not end that relationship b/c she is afraid of being alone. and if you do call, that will break the ice between the two of u and I guarantee she will pursue u with a vengeance. I am also sure she still calls you leaving u messages too.
2007-03-21 09:05:02 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
she nuts or just using him or trying to lead you on to make it seem like you have a chance (if she thinks you want her back of course, even though you have been ignoring her) i dont know the whole situation or you, but maybe try responding to an e-mail or something and saying that you have no interest and she should leave you alone, or keep ignoring her and see how much further she takes it (although as you say, 9 months has been a long time already)
2007-03-21 08:56:00 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
uhhh...geez, dude. Well if you want to know the truth it sounds like she is tryin real hard to play head games with you...she's doin it just so you will HAVE to ask yourself questions like this...I know from personal experience i have one doin it right now...i truly believe it is an issue of control...they feel if they keep contact and they keep your hopes up...without loving you back, then they have some sort of power over you and it makes them feel stronger and more independant. I say you're doin the right thing by not keeping contact, but if you have to then just probe a little before getting in too deep again...Stay focused Bro.
2007-03-21 08:58:07 · answer #5 · answered by Sire_D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's playing you and you have done the right thing in not talking to her for 9 months. She doesn't know what she wants and you'd be better off finding some one who does know what they want.
2007-03-21 08:57:07 · answer #6 · answered by heidi t 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
mayb she wants a big reaction or something
but just to inform u some girls r really twisted (not me)
mayb she wants u to feel jealous or somthing
but i would say go cut all ties with her and go out and have fun
2007-03-21 08:54:19 · answer #7 · answered by Sweet n' Sour 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe she still likes you and when you don't respond to her MSG it gets under her skin because you moved on she is not going to quit till you respond and give her what she wants
2007-03-21 08:57:17 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is crazy block her!
2007-03-21 08:53:52 · answer #9 · answered by ikillwhales 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋