She was losing her house 9 years ago and of course I didnt have the heart to let her go homeless so I let her move in with us. She is STILL here! NINE years later! She is a kind person but has an obnoxious personality and just drive me NUTS!!!!!!!
I want her to go but dont have the heart to say "You know.... you it's about time for you to go." LOL
2007-03-21 07:50:16 · 14 answers · asked by Kel Kel 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Well first of all, you should have a long talk with your husband about the situation if you haven't already. Find out how he feels before you say something to his mother. Trust me on this one men are very protective of there mothers. No matter what they say about there moms it's a different story when they hear someone else say something about there mom! So walk softly on this situation, you don't want to cause any bad feeling with you and your husband over his mother. But I agree with that she does need to be relocated. Just make sure you and your husband are in agreement on it. Maybe turn it around to not that she is driving you nuts but that she doesn't have the privacy or life she deserves living in your home. Maybe she'll realize you are right and it will make things alot easier if she is looking forward to a new independent lifestyle. Either way good luck with the situation! Mother-in-laws can be the start of alot of trouble in a relationship.
2007-03-21 09:09:32 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
OK, this is a real issue with a mom. I don't mean to insult but I would go nuts if I had to live with any of my adult children unless I was taking my last breaths and even then I think they'd have to tie me down. Not to mention dig up half their yard because I garden.
See if you can get her interested in things outside the house including looking at some small apartments. If she's disabled but, able to live on her own, just see if she's interested in looking for something really close to the house.
2007-03-21 16:19:19 · answer #2 · answered by GoodQuestion 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel for you. At this point there may no longer be a way to rid yourself of her without causing any anomosity.
I would start by discussing this with your husband. Let him know how you feel and make sure you dont do it in a pointing finger way like "your mother is -". Say it something like "I really crave the time when it was just you and me, do you think your other siblings can share the responsibility of providing a home for your mom now since we have been doing it for 9 years?"
What ever you decide keep in mind that you are doing it for you and your husband. Also always agree that you are in this together. He can not go to his mom and say "My wife thinks -" when discussing this with his mom or anyone else for that matter, it needs to be both of you not just you.
Best,
G
2007-03-21 15:30:00 · answer #3 · answered by Georgina 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give the gift of relocation find her a place to live pay the deposit and the first months lease then give here big hug
and tell her (we will stop by) after you are all settled, then collect your own house key, take a vacation to reacquaint
your self with your husband just some one on one time for the two of you. Know phones you do get the picture.
2007-03-21 15:08:13 · answer #4 · answered by Tennessee Mom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Funny thing I got 1 of those only mine lives 6 blocks away & still thinks she runs things.If you dont tell her she will eventually ruin your relationship.
mother in laws are a huge part of problems in a relationship.Maye your hubbyshould step up & be a man & tell mama to move out...good luck
2007-03-21 15:22:53 · answer #5 · answered by in desperate need of help 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try looking for a new place for her to move into. Tell here you came across it and thought it was perfect for her. If you act as if it is her interest rather than yours it will not seem as much like you are pushing her out. I know how you must feel,not wanting to insult her. Good luck.
2007-03-21 15:04:37 · answer #6 · answered by Confused 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
on your own, look for a place for her then one day, somehow happen by it while driving with her and say"hey what a cute place. it's perfect for you. why don't we take a look?" no doubt she'll say something about not being in the market for one right now and then tell her " well its here and you were going to get one anyway. the timing is perfect with spring coming" remind her of all the things she has that she could decorate with too. i know, sounds far fetched but it could happen.
2007-03-21 15:04:46 · answer #7 · answered by racer 51 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
This is how it is! You NEED to tell her that this is your home and your space! You must tell her that her behavior will not be tolerated!! Like a child you must lay "ground rules" down and make her follow them. If your husband does not want to do anything, you must! It WILL eventually hurt you relationship if you don't something! You will feel like a *****, but it WILL be worth it!! STAY STRONG!
2007-03-21 14:58:11 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Harry B.- SHAME ON YOU.......(although, I couldn't help but smile).
Just be frank with her and let her know she needs to find her own life. It's not up to you and your husband to house her this long.
Make her get a social life, and maybe she'll get out on her own!
2007-03-21 15:03:30 · answer #9 · answered by Boo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Close your eyes, I guarantee you won't see her. LOL. This is something your husband needs to discuss with his mother. You need your privacy as a couple and after 9 years of sacrificing, you deserve it!
2007-03-21 14:54:10 · answer #10 · answered by rangerbaldwin 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋