How has having a child changed you?

Question

How have you adjusted to the change? Do you feel confident as a parent? Are you ok with your "new" life post-baby? Honest answers please!

I should add how do you think of yourself now, as a parent, and how has it affected your identity?

Answer 1

When I had my son, I was worried I would never be happy again because I was such an independant person and absolutely loved the freedom my husband and I had. At home I was scared I wouldn't know how to take care of him, but It really didn't take me long to figure things out and I was blown away by the love and the connection I felt with him even before he was born.
He died several years ago when he was 2, after a babysitter left him alone in the tub for a second and he drowned, and I can honestly say I never have and no doubt never will experience such profound grief. For the longest time I felt like my life had no purpose anymore, now that I was no longer a parent, which was odd since I had been so worried I would feel so tied down once I had a child. Now that i'm handling the grief and the guilt a little better, I look forward to being a parent again.

Answer 2

I don't have near as many close friends anymore and that is sad but I look at my family and the friends I do have and I couldn't be happier. I feel like I am a very confident parent. I don 't know everything but I know that I do everything to the best of my abilities and I do what I feel is best for my kids. My life post-baby is everything I have ever wanted. I can say with out a doubt if everything in my life was the same except for kids I would not be near as happy or confident as I am now. My kids are the best thing I have ever done!!

Answer 3

I think being a Parent for me started already in Pregnancy. At first, I did not feel very confident in my new and permanent role as a Mother, but I think it had a lot to do with the fact I had a bad First Birth. This is something I have now come to believe is the root cause of many Mothers being depressed and disoriented. Also, it is hard to be alone with one's child and think : " I am totally responsible for this Being on this Earth and I must keep it alive !!!!". But one finds one's ways after a while, although Children are reknown to resist habits. At least, I have learned about giving and lately, I am receiving much love from my Children. We compete as to whom loves the other more ! Well, I can party as a result of a few night drills I had to go through. Perhaps, Parenthood has made me a better person - more patient, more Humane.

Answer 4

Well I have four Kids. My first child I didnt think I could handle taking care of him. but as time went on it kinda got easier. But there will be ups and downs. you will get tired the first 4 to 5 months. but Its a blessing to have a child. Because the child is a part of you and when you wake up every morning and see your own creation it's the best gift you could ever have. I have adjusted very well with the change its hard but its life. I feel very confident as a parent, at first I didnt but there is help out there if you need it. Im fantastic.

Answer 5

I had my first child at 16 so I had to grow up fast but it didnt hurt me one bit. I finished school and graduated with my class.Worked 25 hours a week -mostly on weekends. I never got welfare but got lots of support and help from my parents. Now I have three kids ages 7, 5, and 2 and am finishing my degree at the university. I think haveing a child changed my whole life because I looked at everything differently after I had her. So even tho at the time it looked so bleak everything did work out and I am happy with my life, home school my kids, and work with the Girl Scouts. My husband works hard and I dont have to leave my children except to attend my classes which is only 16 hours a week.

Answer 6

You feel like it all fell in your lap at once even though you had plenty of time to prepare and plan, or at least I did. I don't think that any parent feels confident but you have to do what you think is best. I wouldn't change having my baby and I am ok w/ my post baby life, it just takes time to adjust and feel more comfortable.

Answer 7

I am more responsible. That's for sure. I stopped smoking weed when I was 3 months pregnant with my now 4.5 year old daughter. I don't drink to get drunk.
I decided to lose weight(a LOT of weight-over 100lbs)because I want to be a good example to both my kids on how to choose healthy foods and exercise(my son is 13.5 months old).
I am big on teaching words, games, and writing to my daughter. My 13.5 month old has already begun repeating 2 word sentences in context.
It is AMAZING watching my kids develope socially, emotionally, and acedemically.
I love being a mommy. I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world.

Answer 8

I drive sensibly (although I'm told that they like that I drive faster than daddy). The Disney radio station is always on in the car. I don't watch programs and movies that aren't suitable for the children. Intimacy often takes a back seat to sleepovers with the one year old.

Answer 9

im more patient. im more cautious and conscious of decision making. i cook and stay home alot more. having 2 children of my own in my life has changed my life drastically, but i wouldnt trade in being a mom for anything in the world.

i have found myself at times to wonder if i have the strength and know how to do this, but that is part of being a mom. i tend to worry more, but about totally different things like are they eating their lunch at school, did we get all their homework done, did their shoes match when they left this morning. i found worrying to be a normal thing for mothers, but we all worry about different things. i feel confident that my children make me happy and that i make them happy, that they are healthy, that the choices we make tend to be the right ones, that i am teaching them morals and manners, that i am being the best mom i could be for them. i know my children are my life.

there are 3 big differences though for me being a mom. the biggest for me is a feeling of completeness. i was happy when i got married, but i felt something was missing in my life. after having my 2 kids, i feel whole, like i was meant to have kids.
the second is love. there is no other kind of love you get from and for your kids. the best feeling is when your kids come from school and want to tell you all about it, or when they tell you they love you out of the blue, or when they come give you a hug and kiss just because. i loved my children the day i found out i was pregnant with each of them and love them more each day if that is possible.
the last for me is a joy, a different kind of joy i didnt have before. watching my children play sports, walks to the park, funny little sayings they have. its the little things that make me happy.
if i didnt have children, i wouldnt know these feeling. i wouldnt feel complete. i wouldnt have the joy and love of being a mom. sure it is hard work, but so well worth it.

Answer 10

Way more patient, Way more love for him and my husband. Totally love being a mom, hasn't changed our relationship as husband and wife, except make us closer. I love the new identity of Mom ADDED to that of wife, woman, daughter, sister -- it re-kickstarted my confidence and sense of FUN!