when you've already started falling for someone?
2007-03-21 02:45:55 · 13 answers · asked by fabulous_girl83 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
A Guarded heart can not experience fully. Let it go, live , love , but most of all , learn. We need bad experiences in life too, or we wouldn't know what good is. But the guarded, caged heart , never learns.
2007-03-21 02:51:25 · answer #1 · answered by EGOman 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is soooo hard to do. All I can say is to keep the relationship light. Don't give away your feelings, yet. Don't tell him you love him even though you are over flowing with what feels like love. Take things very slowly, especially physically. Remember, we don't have to say things just because we feel them. Timing is everything.
Relationships have phases. The first is that overwhelming desire to be with them 24/7, you think about them 24/7 and it can be overwhelming. Your feelings are so strong you think it must be love. But WARNING: You are in danger of being very hurt if you express your feelings during this time. Besides, they may just be surface feelings at this point. Also, expressing your feelings now will freak him out a little, even if he has expressed his. Guys will say anything at this point because either 1)he is in lust or 2)because he wants to be physical and he will say what you want to hear 3) or he feels it just like you do but it is surface at this point. If you confess your undying love then he may start backing off. Let him keep wondering and don't let him get too comfortable.
The next phase you start seeing them a little more clearly and things might start bugging you. You might start have a some differences. This is when you learn if you can work through those differneces, or if you even want to.
Then once you get past that phase you settle into a comfortable, easy bonded relationship that is very deep. If you get this far, that is when you can be more sure that the relationship is solid and less likely to fall apart. This is the time to express your heartfelt feelings.
Just be patient and take it verrrrrry slowly.
2007-03-21 10:17:38 · answer #2 · answered by Hope 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you choose to fall for them, where you take your thoughts, which lead to desires (again, what happens is all choice) and then actions. Nothing happens without decision.
I personally made some moves to keep myself from getting into any relationships, even though I had some PRIME choices of really beautiful at heart and marriageable girls I could have dated. I've chosen not to date for the hope of fulfilling a higher calling in my life. It is all choice, my friend.
To "guard you heart", as you put it, you must establish what are your PRIORITIES and VALUES in life that true love and relationships will NOT get in the way of. E.g. "I will not murder for love", or, "I will not get a tattoo if that's what's required to get the girl I like, because I have values that are above that." For me, it's a dedication to God.
Cheers and BE IN CONTROL, because you ought to decide your future and impact the world how you want to and not be led simply by desires, lusts and passing passions.
Gman.
2007-03-21 09:54:27 · answer #3 · answered by gman 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You pretend? I'm not sure, still trying to figure this one out- I've fallen for someone I can't have. Have you ever heard this song, "You've got to give a little, take a little, and let your poor heart break a little, that's the story of, that's the glory of love". Cheesy but true...
2007-03-21 09:52:12 · answer #4 · answered by Ruby L 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Compare them to what you really think should be in your lover.
Count the many negatives they have that will result in your not wanting them ever!
Say things to make them angry and SEE their true colours!
Ask about why thye could never get along with their previous lovers and watch the reaction! If they are silent,...it's secrets time, and STAY AWAY from them!
If they go on about the faults of their previous lovers,..STAY AWAY< for they will find YOUR faults and drop you too!
If they speak about THEIR mistakes, and THEIR faults that broke-up their loves, then maybe they're telling the truth and you should shelve this idea of not wanting to give your precious heart to them!
Think about these points ONE more time!
2007-03-21 10:01:15 · answer #5 · answered by cullentoons 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you have already started falling... uh oh... but if you THink you NEED to guard your heart you shouldnt be with this person to begin with. You need to trust someone if you are going to open up to them
2007-03-21 09:48:51 · answer #6 · answered by sweetiecem 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
good one! i'm not very good at it though but i've learned that once you get to kissing and being close, your heart seems to forget it's being guarded, so stay as friends for a while and be around others when you are together
2007-03-21 09:49:06 · answer #7 · answered by forget_me_not 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just put up a wall and keep the person arms length away from your heart.
2007-03-21 09:52:55 · answer #8 · answered by Steph1490 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's normal to feal you need to protect yourself , you are human . Now all i can tell you is that you have to just have fun and go with it . you never know if your gonna get hurt unless you let yourself go and "fall in love"
2007-03-21 09:48:53 · answer #9 · answered by Agent 217 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
try thinkin more with your head than your heart. but the surest way to guard your heart is by lettin it be totaly free.
2007-03-21 09:51:10 · answer #10 · answered by nkemnonchalant 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋