a broken heart?

Question

how can i get over my broken heart..i feel totally destroyed inside..am trying to get out and about a bit difficult as i have children at home..i have joined a dance class 1 evening a week but feel so lonely..any other advice you can give me as i don,t have many friends to talk too..

Answer 1

In another question, you said that you are slim and attractive so why not post some pictures on your 360 profile (partially obscure your face if your wish to remain anonymous). You will undoubtedly get some admiring emails that may serve as a short term distraction until life improves.

Answer 2

I find it the best to just call up a friend I haven't hung out with in a long time because of my relationship (i was distracted by him i didn't have time for my friends). I just broke it off with my boyfriend of 13 months last saturday. I was so hurt. But it's important to keep yourself busy. I noticed that when I am sitting at home alone or have nothing to do. I suddenly think of him and start crying.

Be a busy bee! You said you have children? Take them out for an ice cream or do something with them. Call a baby sitter and go out with friends. You don't need to talk to them about what happened. Just have fun. It's good you have dance classes once a week. Would be good to add more activites. Maybe start a hobby at home. Keep yourself busy. I started sewing and reading my books I bought a long time ago but never had time to read them.

The only thing that will heal a broken heart completely is time.

Answer 3

I think the truth here is that there is no proven way to get over heartbreak, at least none that I've found.
Time does help and you've already taken some good steps toward healing.
The fact that you're taking dance lessons will help to energize you and that too will make you feel somewhat better. For instance, feel better, look better.
Like yourself and know that when you give your heart, you've given your all.
You said you don't have many friends. That could be the key to helping to heal your broken heart and a good step to finding new love, make some new friends! You can do it! : )
I've always heard that the best way to forget someone is 'someone new'.
I know it doesn't lessen the hurt but it's still good medicine.
Good luck to you and I wish you only the best.

Answer 4

If your children are young enough, get them out to the park, enjoy watching them have fun, forget about your problems for a while.

If either they are too young or too old to play in the park, put the younger ones in a pram/buggy or send them to their friends if they are older and get out.

I found going to the park for a walk made me feel so much better, as i went through a similar thing not long ago. It gives you time to think about what is going on in your life and also people watching can be quite fun, i used to sit and try and imagine what other peoples lives are like, what their jobs might be etc....

Do whatever takes your mind off your problems, just done sit around the house feeling sorry for yourself or you could sink into a depression which would not be good for either yourself or your children. Make sure they are first priority in your life!

Good Luck!

Answer 5

hi there,everyone knows what your goin through cause everyones been in a situation thats similar at some point in there lives.the best thing to do is not go lookin for a replacement right away.concentrate on yourself and more importantly your kids.it takes time to heal a broken heart ,but it does still heal.get more involved with your kids because some of there friends parents will be in a similar situation to you,looking for a friend.only listen to upbeat music by the way no sad songs!and be positive things will get better .good luck and all the best.

Answer 6

the dance class is only a good idea if there are women there that are free, you like, and like you back. usually you make an instant connection with someone, so you would know by now. also, try and go out with guy friends from work, strengthen the bonds, as having buddies to go out with for a beer are great as they will set you up with women, provide support, and give you an escape from yourself. an active social life is key to finding new love.

Answer 7

Maybe concentrate on your children and spend as much time as possible with them. Cook them special meals, take them to the cinema, adventure park. What I am trying to do is to keep your mind busy so that you don't dwell on your relationship and concentrate yourself on people that you love. Do you maybe have enough money to take a break somewhere with the kids, that could do you the world of good just to get away from it all and re-evaluate your life.

Answer 8

Sorry for you darl.
It is easy for us all to say what you should or shouldn't
do - but the only thing is to ride along with it.
You WILL get through this. Focus on your children.
They need their mom so you have to be strong.
(A haircut worked for me!!lol) By coming on here
you are in contact with the outside world. So you are
not alone. Good Luck. (And keep up the dancing - you
are brave to be out and trying - well done to you!)

Answer 9

Hi, sorry you are going thru such a bad time, i went through this myself some time ago, and i know this wont help right now but you will get over it. try not to dwell on what has happened to much, get yourself out as much as you can, talk to anyoen you can but about other things going on in your life, not the past.

Hope you feel better

feel free to email me [e-mail]

Answer 10

Relationship breakdown
The breakdown of any relationship can be devastating especially when one of the partners may not have felt that there was anything wrong with the relationship and it has come as a total shock when their partner announces they are leaving. In some situations a person can feel so hurt, betrayed, that they feel they cannot go on living. The reality is that life does have to go on but it is important that you allow yourself time and space to grieve for the loss of your relationship. Too many people rush into another relationship without having come to terms with the loss of the previous relationship. Often people may feel frightened of being alone but rushing into a relationship before you are ready may only lead to further heartache for you.

A loss of a relationship can also mean a loss of confidence, especially if your partner has left you for someone else. Just as a person can fall in love, a person can fall out of love and/or fall in love with someone else. It may be hard to accept but if you still have love feelings for your partner would you really want him/her to stay with you if ultimately they were unhappy and maybe they can find a chance of being happy with someone else and you can also have a chance of finding happiness and fulfilment in another relationship.

If your partner has recently left and it has dented your confidence then try and use the time to build your confidence and self esteem up. Try not to look at it that it must have been something wrong about you, or you were not attractive enough or run yourself down as too many people do. Recognise that the reason for the breakdown may have been nothing to do with you but more to do with where your partner was at and maybe how they had changed.

Try to take something positive from what you may see as a totally negative situation. If you had a number of happy years with your partner then tell yourself that that is something which you had which perhaps other people haven't had. Some people go throughout their life never knowing what it feels like to be in a happy, loving relationship. If you are having difficulty in letting go of your ex partner it may help to write a letter about how you feel about the ending of the relationship. This can be therapeutic and prevent you from bottling things up inside which can lead to depression. Some people may write a letter and then destroy it or some may choose to send it to their ex partner. You need to do whatever you feel will help you to let go of the previous relationship and move on with your life. Try to see it as a new beginning.

Try not to constantly dwell on the past and what may or may not have happened if you had done things differently. You did what you felt was right at the time - everyone can look back in hindsight and think how they may have acted differently - however, you cannot change the past, - but you can take that insight with you into future relationships and do things differently in future relationships. Try not to feel bitter and vengeful against your ex partner - this will only end up destroying you and will not help you to move on.

You may feel isolated as sometimes when partners break up they may find that their friends tend to take sides and may not be so friendly towards you. Use this time to take stock of your life and how you can make a new life for yourself. Many people take the opportunity to spend time on making themselves feel good, a new hairdo, new clothes, taking up new interests and hobbies where you can meet new people, make new friendships, boost your confidence. Life does have to go on and try to see it as a new beginning in your life with new challenges. It is natural you may find difficulty in trusting potential partners which is why it is so important not to rush into a new relationship when you are vulnerable. Take time to get to really know someone first and give the person time to really get to know you.