My 10 year old daughter has two very close friends. Lately there has been so much drama between them it is driving me crazy! She always seems to be caught in the middle of freuds between the other two girls. Yesterday she was at one of the girls house and the mother totally went off yelling at my daughter and the other girl because this womans daughter got her feelings hurt about something. My daughter came home in tears. Needless to say I was livid that this mom yelled at my child and didnt include her own daughter in the tirade. Later the mom called me to try and smoothe things over but I told her that my daughter wont be coming over there for awhile and her daughter wont be coming to my house that I feel that the girls need a break for now. I dont have a problem with the other girl and I intend to let my daughter still play with her. Now my daughter feels uncomfortable and is very upset about the situation has this happened to anyone else ?
2007-03-20 22:42:32 · 10 answers · asked by mom of twins 6 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
I totally agree about letting them work it out themselves but when another mom yells at my child it really hits a nerve with me. Please give suggestions on what has worked for you and your daughters..Thanks.
2007-03-20 22:53:14 · update #1
Angie..with the cowboy hat. I am GLAD that you are not my mother I feel sorry for your daughter. It is NEVER ok to yell at someone else's kid, talk yes but yell no.
2007-03-21 08:47:15 · update #2
Ahh, I had this problem last year with my daughter.
Parents should not get involved-girls at that need to start working it out themselves. It is poor example( the other mom)
to set for your child.
You did the right thing. Your daughter should take a break and let things cool down. If she feels uncomfortable going to the other childs house in the future, don't let her.
Just encourage her to try and focus on other friends right now-maybe have some other girls come over.
I took my daughter out of the situation-called other moms, set up things with other girls. As a result, she got alot more self confidence. Just as long as you keep telling her not to get involved in their fights and focus on other things and girls who make her feel good. she doesn't need that negativity at such a young age.
Good luck
2007-03-21 02:49:08 · answer #1 · answered by Willow 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can't say you are right for getting upset over your child being yelled at, You weren't there you really don't know what happened. Being a mother of a ten year old girl my self have dealt with the exact same issues.
Little Girls are Mean. lol.
My daughter has been on both the receiving end and the giving end. I have to trust that the child's parents will handle a situation the way it should be handled.
You didn't go into detail but unless she was called horrible names or cussed at or hit I don't see any thing to get mad about.
You are showing your daughter that she doesn't have to listen to any one, that her mommy will come to her rescue if she gets yelled at. If you don't want some one else to correct your child then you really should keep her home.
2007-03-21 15:37:16 · answer #2 · answered by angie 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
This has happened to me over the past week!!!! Honestly I think you have done the right thing. normally when my 11yr old and her best friend fight I don't get involved as it is between them and they normally sort it out within a couple of days but last week my daughter came home in tears because her friend and her mother were saying in a very loud voice so that my daughter and her other friends heard that my daughter was not a very good friend and the mother said that she was disgusted by her behaviour and all because my child was talking to another girl.
I confronted the mother and told her that in no way was she to ever speak about or to my child like that again.
I don't think this will get any better but all you can do is be there for your daughter and support her when she argues with friends.
2007-03-21 09:00:15 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Two's company, three's a crowd. This is so common with girls. The worst thing you can do is to get involved and try and influence your daughter away from one of the other kids.
Not only does this encourage the feud between the children but it also sets you agains the other mother.
My experience tells me that these things are usually just a storm in a tea-cup and they are all best of friends the following day, only to fall out over something equally as trivial the next.
2007-03-21 05:51:48 · answer #4 · answered by Colin_Waft 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
As a parent of a 10 year old who also works in a school, I can assure you this type of behavior is quite common, especially with girls this age. It is very difficult for kids this age to be in groups of 3 - one of my "mom friends" will not allow only one child to come to her house, as she has two kids close in age - there always has to be 4 kids. It appears as though when there are three, two seem to pair up and gang up on the third, always resulting in hurt feelings. It is probably wise to separate the 3 girls for a while, and see if things blow over. Unfortunately, this is usually only the beginning for girls - the drama tends to continue and increase as they get older. Good luck!
2007-03-21 12:19:45 · answer #5 · answered by tech_girl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My 11 year old has dealt with this very situation and it has provides many oppotunities for discussion about being a responsible Christian. We often relate parables to the situation and allow my daughter to figure out the approach herself. Mostly, I encourage her to understand that friendships are ever evolving and use the example of her siblings to prove the point. If another mom were ever to yell at my daughter, that would be the end of that friendship if I could not resolve the problem because I expect adults in my children's lives to act accordingly and to set good examples.
2007-03-21 06:00:58 · answer #6 · answered by mysti_gal11 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I'm glad to see that you hate it when your child is yelled at. You did the right.
When I was at a friends house numerous times, the mom of my friend would spend hours yelling at my mother, about everything that was 'wrong with me'. Then, my mom would yell at me, instead of realizing that the other mom just had a different point of view of the way a child should act.
2007-03-21 08:28:25 · answer #7 · answered by selena620 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this has happened to me before..we eventually worked it out but it was kinda hard. you have to talk to the mother about not yelling at your kid and then but the 2 kids together for awhile...sooner or later they will talk and put it all behind them
2007-03-21 15:40:36 · answer #8 · answered by louis 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
kids will be kids..you as a parent you can't interfere-all the time-even though you want to ,sometimes that's the hardest part about being a parent-trust me they will all be friends by next week..
2007-03-21 05:49:20 · answer #9 · answered by American breed 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes . it won't stop there too ! it's part of growing up and doesn't stop once they think they've grown . just teach her to be strong and that will help her in the long run
2007-03-21 05:46:43 · answer #10 · answered by asphyxia 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋