to be honest i dont like this kind of guy who adores his family so much. i want to have a man who only adores me and put me on the top before anyone else. but i really love this man i'm dating. what should i do?
2007-03-20 21:21:05 · 13 answers · asked by cutie 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
you are selfish...
your............
going...............
to................
HELL.............................
MABE
OR NOT but sheesh cant some one love his family grow up
2007-03-20 21:24:22 · answer #1 · answered by Ace_Spade 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, people usually follow a pattern with their personality traits. A strong relationship and adoration of family members will also lead to strong feeling with the right person in their life.
If you have a man with a distant relationship with his family, the same may be true when it comes to you over time. There are exceptions to the rule, but for the most part psychologists are going to tell you that you should look for someone with a similar social pattern to your own...
Good luck with your man. If things don't work out, ensure that you look in the right places for your future relationship partners!
2007-03-21 19:43:34 · answer #2 · answered by Mark V 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If a guy doesn't adore his family he truly doesn't have much to offer you because at his core the people who's he spent his entite life hold no importance in his life. I understand you want to be the center of and the most important person in his life but having a close knit family means he's has a good foundation and sense of security. You're a bonus and hold a special place that's all your own. It's not a competition.
2007-03-21 04:24:25 · answer #3 · answered by Bonita Applebaum 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
perhaps you dont believe in family,ormothers?..for various reasons that might be valid ones..maybe one is you were not a valued family member and now you could be if they accept you into theirs..he does(believe in family and family values and there is nothing that beats a love for ones mother and mother for son). And if you respect him, then respect his family values. Maybe you can learn valuable lessons by dating someone such as he and see what it is to have a GREAT family of your own someday if that s your future intention.
Life is not about "ME' ...this is where most people'sproblems lie and start(and sometimes end) ..it's about giving and loving and loving is giving...not getting.
you may be selfish for valid reasons right now and maybe you're young in age and at heart, but you can learn to grow out of that by just giving a little of yourself to him, his mother and others..(by getting to know her, a mother, spending time with her, and asking things about her and family and share the kitchen with her, as in cooking or baking cookies,etc)
sometimes you only have to look at things from different perspectives and you will see many different things and different ways in life and about life and others.Also, if he is not living with mom and she is not trying to always run his life , then you got a good man there maybe. Watch how he interacts with family and friends and that will tell you much...
2007-03-21 04:39:20 · answer #4 · answered by Gary G 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with you, but at the same time my husband has had great ties with his family. I have learned that because he adores them (especially his mother,) so much, that has made me insecure about how I will stand up to her.
What I have learned was that because he has such high regards for his mother, he was more willing to treat me like he does her. My cooking, cleaning, etc maybe not what his mother did, but he respects his mother, so I have learned how to accept his respect for what I do.
It has taken a lot of time! :-) I was not used to a guy that respected women so much but after many discussions I learned that I had nothing to compete with his mother about, he loved us both; her for being his mother, and me, for being his wife and lover.
ps, he sounds like a great family oriented guy, I hope you see him as a keeper and can learn how to overcome the differences between how you were raised vs how he was raised as children.
2007-03-21 04:28:55 · answer #5 · answered by kaliroadrager 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well a man that is on good terms with ihs family and especially his mother, is usually a very reliable and honest person. Now offcourse we cant generalize and tell you that your man is exactly like that, but why dont you talk to hima bout it and ask him on what terms did he find this close relationship with his mother? were they always this close? and tell him that its not that you mind it, or disapprove of it, but its just that sometimes you feel sort of left out when he is around the two of you...Hope everything works out for you two...and let me know how it goes in the future...
*Blessed Be*
2007-03-21 04:28:10 · answer #6 · answered by BlueBoy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would adore a guy that loves his family that much. You need to understand that you aren't the only one in his life. You will lose him if you are selfish. Let him have his family because he will love you more for it.
2007-03-21 04:24:01 · answer #7 · answered by Alicia E 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe that a guy who loves esp his mother and sister knows what a woman is worth. He usually knows how to treat a woman right because he would not want his sister or mother to be mistreated. So i don't think u have anything to worry about . All will come in good time.
2007-03-21 04:37:29 · answer #8 · answered by missy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if he loves his family that is wonderful and if you start causing problems you have to know his family will win - On the other hand have you spoke to him about it and let him know you feel left out - Hopefully your honesty will bring some light on your relationship
2007-03-21 04:30:21 · answer #9 · answered by pattijohughes 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are selfish...
a guy who adores his family will definitely adores his love
2007-03-21 04:23:09 · answer #10 · answered by gaf 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think thats good.. it means his family is important to him, if you love him and think that he is the one then you should learn to love him and his family.. Get to know them and love them as your own..
2007-03-21 04:25:07 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋