I am engaged to a very wonderful man, I have shared the past year with him, no big fights, just absolute happiness. The thing is, my best friend came to me and told me that he was in love with me. Before I got with my fiance, I wanted to date my best friend, and I thought I could be in love with him. Each guy has good qualities. What should I do?
2007-03-20 17:58:35 · 16 answers · asked by invisiblekisses2000 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Thanks for all your guys advice so far. Someone mentioned that I hadn't mentioned the fact that I loved my fiance, not a very good writer. I love him with all of my heart, I'd do anything for him. I've also known my best friend for 4 years, and the biggest thing that kept me from dating him before, was that I was against some of the things he does, and his parents have never accepted me as just a friend to him, so how could they accept me as more than a friend? I know who I love, just difficult having someone you really care about confess something that big to you. Thanks again everyone.
2007-03-20 18:13:44 · update #1
Stay with your fiance, you know him more and you are really in love with him. You are just shocked from your best friends confession, but please dont mistake this for more than it is.
2007-03-20 18:01:02 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to list on paper the pro's and con's of both men and you have to decide which man you think you are most compatible with. You also have to follow your heart and honestly answer yourself what do you really want? what will make you really happy? Which man can give you all you want even if its just love. With love, you can get through the hard times and the worst of times. Without love you can have anything because it has no meaning. What will mean the world to you and keep you happy even when everything is so bad? Will he walk away or will he stick by you forever no matter what? Think about it, its the most important decision you will ever make, so make sure you love each other and will stick to each other through no matter what and then you know who you should be with because your heart will tell you the rest. Take care Heather
2007-03-21 01:06:57 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
is your fiance your true love? you thought that you could be in love with your best friend. Make a list about the good things and bad things (you like or dislike) from those two guys. Make comparison and ask yourself if you can accept the bad things of that person and live with it for the rest of your life. Also the last question you have to ask to your self is: can you live without that person? (your fiance or your bestfriend)
hope this will help.
2007-03-21 01:08:22 · answer #3 · answered by Keke 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just like in the movies huh? No doubt this is a difficult situation you are in, but luckily you are not forever binded just yet with your finace. It's easier said than done, but if you have strong feelings for your bf and I mean it in a romantic sense where you picture your life and having kids with him, you should take some time apart from your fiance. He may want to call the whole thing off, but one thing is for sure he does not deserve betrayal or lies. You didnt mention that you loved him. You just said that he was wonderful. There has to be love not just because the person is nice and friendly. Make a list of feelings for both of them and see who outweighs who. Then take the next step in talking to either one.
2007-03-21 01:10:04 · answer #4 · answered by angelcake2301 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did you date your best friend? If you haven't and are considering breaking your engagement to try a relationship with your best friend then be prepared you could end up with neither or you could end up with your soul mate.
I have always told my son a great relationship starts with friendship, it is the solid foundation for any marriage.
I married my best friend and we've been together for almost 19 years.
This is really an answer only you can search your heart and soul for.
2007-03-21 01:06:01 · answer #5 · answered by Believe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your best friend is selfish. He sees your happy with someone and now he decides to say something. If he really was your best friend he would be happy for you too. And a man that has a girl as a best friend is just too much of a pussy to tell the girl he wants to sleep with her in the first place.
2007-03-21 01:04:54 · answer #6 · answered by GamberMan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
are you havint second thoughts about marrying this wonderful man because of the what if.. why didn't you go out with your best friend before? why did you get with this guy instead of your best friend when he asked you? if you truely loved him you would have gone out with him back then... and you spent all this time with your fiance... if you love the man you are with now, stay with him... and keep your best friend a friend... I wouldnt' venture out and explore possable lost love... you are feeling like you should have taken that chance back then because you areu about to get married and it's a big deal... =) I still vote stay with you fiance...and keep the best friend a friend.....
2007-03-21 01:03:26 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOu WANTED to DATE your best firend you THOUGHT you could be in love with him?? All past tense.. how do you feel NOW.. if you have ANY feelings for your best firnd NOW is the time to figure it out.. if you are truly IN LOVE with your fiancee.. then this will be a no brainer for you. if you have to struggle with yourself to find an answer.. you have a problem to resove before the wedding plans go any further
2007-03-21 01:03:05 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG okey i was in the EXACT same situation..me an my bestfriend liked eacother on and off for about 3 years and ya i wanted to get with him before all my ex bf;s...and even wen i was with one of my ex's he told me to leave him so that we can date,,,right now im in a relationship an so is he...an he tol me he loves me and i jus thought to myself the guy im with now is the best thing thas ever happen to me and i wouldnt trade that for anything..so jus remeber if you and your friend were suppose to be together you would have already...everything happens for a reason...and as for me im SOO glad i didnt go out wit my bestfriend beacuse i woulda missed the chance to be with my bf now and i love him soo much...goodluck with your wedding
2007-03-21 01:06:27 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends on your moral code,what do you consider to be the right thing to do?Also consider if you can live with your decision for the rest of your life?Who do you really love?
2007-03-21 01:06:11 · answer #10 · answered by Robert C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋