What do I do? I've decided not to tell her how I feel, It won't change anything, I think?

Question

My mom said when she was younger, there were boys she just didn't want to talk to anymore for no reason, just like the girl I fell in love with and can't seem to let go. She also said this boy told her how he felt about her and she still didn't want to talk to him. So I'm not going to tell this girl how I feel about her because I it won't work. It's just that today I saw her talking, touching and playing with other boys and even though it don't mean nothing except she likes them in a slightly-more-than-friends but-still-not-boyfriend kind of way, it still gets to me because I'm not one of the boys she's flirting with. I can't get her off my mind. I saw her sneak at least 2 looks in my direction though (and it's one of several times I've caught her on separate occasions). I keep asking myself "She never liked you like you liked her, she told you she doesn't want to talk to you anymore, why don't you just forget her? The answer keeps coming back, "Because I miss her and I love her."

Two sides of me are telling me to try because I love her and the other is saying there must be a good reason for my benefit she's gone and let her stay gone. What happened between us was I've liked her since I was 15 and she was 15, when we met, and 4 months into the year 2006 (we were both 16) we talked but after that I did something by mistake, she got mad at me, and I gave her space. When I tried to talk to her she said she didn't want to talk to me anymore. I've tried to move on but I feel like I need her friendship back. Could I have given her too much space (a month and a half), to where she'd think I must not care since I didn't try my hardest to get her back, and that's why she said she doesn't want to talk to me anymore. By the way, when I talked to her online after that about it, she always responded when I said something. Sometimes it seems like she may want to talk to me, and maybe if I just start a casual conversation (instead of saying how I feel) it could work out.

I have the strangest feeling (or delusion, or soon to be dashed hope) that she may want to talk to me if I just be myself to her and act confident and unafraid she won't talk to me, you know, almost like I don't care. She always looks at me from a distance but looks at me then turns away (sometimes) when we're up close. But if I say hi most of the time she'll say hi back. We haven't talked for 11 months as of today because I been to scared to just approach her directly. We were only friends before, and that's all I want back. I think I should call her but what if someone else calls or she doesn't answer? What if I IM her and she doesn't answer? I really want to try just walking up to her but how can I when she's always with a girlfriend, unless it's one that likes me then I should just go for it?

I didn't cheat, I'm not even a cheater, and we weren't dating, it was she said she was falling in love with someone else and I told a friend assuming he wouldn't say nothing and he said something about it around her and she got mad at me.

Answer 1

Take a deep breathe and stop freaking yourself out. I think you hould do your best to reconnect with her. Just talk for long enough and all the world's problems can be fixed. Don't just sit and wait and 'give her space'. Space is like a day, maybe a week, not 11 months. Don't immediately tell her how you feel, just let he know who you still are, and learn who she is. Let it go where it leads, and stop worrying about it and hanging back. But don't pretend like you could care less. Good luck!

Answer 2

Ok well by her always looking at you and flirting with other guys in front of you she is trying to make you jealous. I'm guessing that the mistake you made was cheat on her if this was the case then she feels like the trust was broken and she wants you to see how it feels when she is with someone else. Also the longer you let it go without really talking she is going to think you really don't care. But the one thing that was good was that in a way you kind of ignored her...girls love that and hate it all at the same time its something in us that draws us in more its hard to explain but it is true....what i would do even though it sounds really corny is i would write down everything that you want like to be friends again and just everything you are really feeling whether it sounds stupid or emotional whatever and then email it to her or leave it for her somewhere this way you can tell her exactly how you feel without having to deal with her friends or whoever else is around. Last i would put in it that being friends with her is more important then anything else because you would rather have her in your life as a friend then nothing at all....Hope this helps good luck!!!

Answer 3

why not just actually call her or IM her and be honest with her and tell her how u feel tell her why u did what u did and that ur sorry and u want to have her back as a friend honesty goes along way with girls

Answer 4

just because that happen to your mom when she was young does not mean that it will happen to you. take the risk. ask her out. you know that you want to. you will never forgive your self if you don't so go ahead and do it. ask her.

Answer 5

woooow dat iz 2 much reading