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My boyfriend is such a loving and caring person. But sometimes he tends to forget about my feelings and says things to hurt me. But aferwards he always tells me hes sorry and is so sweet torwards me. He's a very jealous person and little things we talk about can start a fight so quick. I'm a very stubborn person and so is he and neither one of us ever wanna admit to being wrong. I tend to get upset over small things and lose my temper. I love him and want this to work out sooo bad. What can i do to make this work? Please help.

2007-03-20 10:42:31 · 18 answers · asked by I_love_him 1 in Family & Relationships Singles & Dating

18 answers

First off...you need to talk to him. When he hurts you, you need to tell him! You need to say how he made you feel.

Also, learn to grow a backbone. You know he loves you. You BOTH are going to say and do things to each other that you regret. That's part of a relationship.

1) Grow a back bone. In other words, know when to walk away to cool down.

2) COMMUNICATE! You BOTH have to learn how to admit to being wrong. That's what a relationship is!

2007-03-20 10:46:02 · answer #1 · answered by FaZizzle 7 · 0 0

You have to see the whole picture. Because you love him you want to see the best in him and have convinced yourself he is a loving and caring person but in truth he is not that person at all. Again...you have to see the whole picture, the whole person and not put more into those few and far between moments he is once again trying to make up for being a jerk and treating you badly.

Your boyfriend is not such a loving and caring person...he is immature, insecure, disrespectful and emotionally abusive.

If he was loving and caring he wouldn't be treating you that way and you wouldn't be in this situation asking what can you do to make it work.

There is nothing you can do. It is HIS PROBLEM. He has deep issues and it is his responsibility to fix him...not yours. If you stay with him unfortunately you will only just get more of what you have been getting which isn't love, respect and caring.

As Dr Phil says...you teach people how to treat you and the best predictor of future behavior is past behavior.

Best of luck.

2007-03-20 11:01:11 · answer #2 · answered by Intelfem7 2 · 0 0

I hate to say it but, eventually you're going to have to sit him down and talk to him. Start out with what you stated in your question and then put emphasis on the part where you say that both are you are stubborn and that you want to work this out. Also tell him that you guys need to find a way to work this kink out but that it's kind of hard when he gets so jealous and he's mean to you sometimes. And no worries, I also have a short temper, but one thing has to stay on the top of your head, apologize when you're actually wrong! I know it's really hard to do, but if you do it he'll probably start to realize that you do want to stay with him and maybe (just maybe) he'll start to be less jealous because he knows that you his partner and he doesn't have to worry about you being with some other guy. I hope my advice works for you!!!!!! best of luck!

2007-03-20 10:55:35 · answer #3 · answered by Ms.Kruznik92 1 · 0 0

It's not what you can do, but what you BOTH can do. You have to stop being stubborn and take being in the wrong like a grown up. It's perfectly okay to be wrong. Don't let small things get to you. That's exactly what they are: small, which means it's not a big deal. If he's being jealous you need to consult him about it. If he refuses to change, that goes to show how far he would go for the sake of your relationship, and that looks like a walk across the street from what you've said.

2007-03-20 10:47:52 · answer #4 · answered by Blanca 3 · 0 0

If you really want to make it work and you really love him, try to be more co-operative. Think before you say things or before you act. Don't get upset over small things, think a little before you lose your temper, just think it over: is it really an important thing you are being upset about? Will you find it really unimportant and stupid if you look back on it later? If you think you will, just don't bother, don't always concentrate on yourself . Try to work things out logically, you guys don't need to fight. Try to make a compromise, try to be less passionate about unimportant things. Your bf will probably notice this positive change and will be more willing to make a small change about things too. If he doesn't take the effort just talk to him about it. Don't be stubborn, if you want this relationship to work, take the first step! It's not that difficult, you can do it, especially if you love him. Good luck!

2007-03-20 10:52:31 · answer #5 · answered by Hellomynameis 3 · 0 0

Oh gheez. I'm in the same situation here with that. My bf is a jealous guy and can say things that can make the situation not very good. Basically, I was told that guys tend to do that stuff to make you jealous to see how much you really love them.

I'm not sure as to how he is hurting you with it... I mean basically my bf just asks me about who I'm with and if that person has a thing for me or not and if I did anything. Basically, the answer is always no.

You need to say something to him about it... What is he saying?

2007-03-20 10:50:22 · answer #6 · answered by Ashley 3 · 0 0

In a relationship there are exams and balances merely like the government. besides the fact that if, i think women human beings might desire to have the top hand and could be happy to be extra on top of issues. There are men obtainable that could be extra uncomplicated yet anyhow, in the journey that your boyfriend is mendacity to then you definitely confront him approximately it. He could be showering you with presents to conceal all his lies, this might nicely be a considerable pitfall for some ladies as they forget approximately honesty because of presents and finally end up being harm interior the top. with a bit of luck you could persist with your instinct and do what you sense is nice, you could unload him at any time so be happy to realize this, this is the reason ladies are extra effectual and likewise because of fact men quite often ask out the lady so the females in certainty say specific or no to having a relationship. reliable success

2016-11-27 01:24:33 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

There is nothing you can do to make it work, there are things that both of you can do together. In a real relationship there is no I, it take 2 two fight and two to make it work. It will never work as long as only one of you are trying. I know, for years I tried to make my relationship with my husband work but it never was quite right until he decide he would try as hard as I was and then and only then did our marriage truly flourish. Until you work together towards the same goal at the same time you will always struggle.

2007-03-20 10:49:19 · answer #8 · answered by Petra 5 · 0 0

You both just need to gain an understanding of what is acceptable to both of you and what is not. Please do not allow him to bring you down though. A lot of times people in abusive relationships try to blame themselves for the others faults and if this happens to be your case you deserve a lot better. If not just try talking it out. I know it seem hard but if it doesn't work out you will find someone else. Remember this saying " you will love like this again except when you do you will deny ever loving like this before"

2007-03-20 10:48:39 · answer #9 · answered by Mandie 4 · 0 0

you want to get your relationship with your boyfriend to work? well then you need to get some time alone to talk to him. i mean not talking about stupid things like the weather and stuff but im talking about things like how you 2 feel about eachother now. If he wants to work things out as well then he will be more than willing to talk to you... and if you say your boyfriend often hurts you then mabey it's because he doesn't love you? im not trying to sound harsh or anything ub tyou say he has a temper and is very jelous.. mabey it's best if you 2 ended it before you get in 2 deep and he really hurts you.. emotionaly and physically.

2007-03-20 10:46:14 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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